


Mine

by XxstrifexX



Series: Yandere Series [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blow Job, Drama, Fluff and Angst, Implied Sexual Abuse, M/M, Psychological Drama, Smut, Some Humor, Sorry Not Sorry, Switching, Yandere!Levi, Yaoi, ereri, mild violence, riren - Freeform, yandere with plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-06
Updated: 2014-05-18
Packaged: 2017-12-25 20:00:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 64,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/957040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XxstrifexX/pseuds/XxstrifexX
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You’ll love only me, you’ll grant any wish I make, and you’ll give yourself to me the way I will continue to give myself to you. Live for me like I live for you. I love you Eren, more than you would ever know. Now tell me the same, tell me you’ll love only me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Oh my god I don't even....... This was supposed to be simple and well..... 20 pages happened 
> 
> Therefore The first chapter will be Plot and back story 
> 
> The second chapter will be straight crazy Yandere!Levi/Eren goodness..... 
> 
> With this first chapter I've opened up quite a few possibilities in turning this one into a series ~ I'll entertain that idea more after I get some Idol worship chapters and another To Exist chapter up depending on whether or not this is shit 
> 
>  
> 
> honestly 8000 words.... I can't proof this... I don't know if this is good or not but well you guys be the judge let me know what ya think (⊙﹏⊙✿)

There’s a frost nipping at his toes and stinging his fingertips. No matter how hard he digs his hands into his chilled body, he can’t keep the warmth in his hands. His knees are drawn to his chest, scraps of newspaper and cardboard under his ass, trying to prevent the cold pavement from freezing his rump, arms wrapped so tightly around himself it hurts. His clothing’s far too thin to prevent the cold air from seeping in to kiss his goose pimpled skin. 

He should go home, he knows this, knows that despite the waft of alcohol and filth, it’s warm there. At the very least, he wouldn’t freeze to death, but the idea of his keeper, he wouldn’t dare call him a father, willed him to take the risk. A couple more hours and the man would be laid out. He could sneak in then, quiet and perhaps even hide before he woke. 

There is a convenient little access to a crawl space, tucked away in the back of his closet. The previous owners more than likely cut out the section of wall to get to plumbing, he however, dubbed it his safe haven. He was lucky he was tinier than most, it wasn’t the most comfortable place to hide, and of course it was dirty, but his father didn’t know about it. He filled his closet the best he could to distract attention from the two by two square cut into the closet’s side wall, and so far it had been a sanctuary if things went south. 

Once home, if his father woke, he could easily make his retreat. Making it seem like he never came home the night before. It wouldn’t be the first time he had fooled that man into thinking he wasn’t there. Anything so he could escape his hands, his fist, his… 

He didn’t finish the thought, a strange noise, from his suppressed whimper, low in his throat, reached his ears. It only served to upset him, beside himself with embarrassment. He’s alerted to the sound of someone passing by, or at least, he hopes they will walk past the alley. But his luck was always as fresh as a week old dog shit.

His breath stills as he hears foot falls growing louder, and he pushes himself further against the brick wall of the tiny alley, praying the bags of garbage hid him well enough so he couldn’t be seen. 

You never knew who would stumble through these narrow passages, nor would one want to find out. He was young, but he wasn’t stupid. At only fifteen, he was well versed in the grotesque nature of mankind. The way they thought, processed, desired and craved, especially when there was no one to judge their actions. Unbridled thoughts becoming realized, much in the way people hid behind technology.

Anyone could be anything, say anything, without much consequence. Anonymity, was a frightening steroid for those repressed by society. It wasn’t always a problem, most of the time it was innocent curiosity, but in turn it could just as well be brutal, vicious, and unrelenting. 

The footsteps stop short a few feet away, and he holds his breath. He hears a cooing, something being set down, whispered mournful words, heartbroken and rushed, and he feels his heart drop from his chest at the sound of a small gargled giggle. He hears the rustling of fabric before feet make their way hurriedly out of the alley. 

Then he hears it. Hears the small sniffle slowly transform into a pitched wail. He doesn’t waste time in jumping up, his bones creak and pop at the force of movement after being still for so long. He ignores the ache, stumbling over his numb feet. He looks to the end of the alley to find it empty, whoever was there, gone. He turns to face the bundle in a makeshift box, his heart nearly shattering at the cruelty of it all. 

It’s not that this doesn’t happen. These things do happen, too much to justify in this area, despite the poverty and depravity that ran ramped. He carefully bends down, lifting the bundle at arm’s length in front of his eyes. The small, hand knitted blanket falls over the babies shoulder, the child ceasing its tears, wet wide eyes lock onto his own. In the poor light he can’t make out the exact color, but he thinks they’re hazel or golden brown. The boys tears forgotten, he smiles with his tongue out, innocent and unaware of his own abandonment.

A tiny hand tries to clasp itself around his thumbs, when proving fruitless the child chuckles and slaps at them playfully before scratching at them. Tears are still wet on the baby’s plump pink cheeks, his toothy grin moist from either snot or drool, perhaps even a combination of both, and despite how disgusting the little soiled shit is, he can’t help but think he’s cute. 

He’s found children a couple times before, but never this young. He’d brought the police more than a fair share of toddlers, lost or abandoned, only to have them thrown into new families or homes. Some ended up better than others, but most he didn’t have the slightest what became of them. It was enough to know they were warm and feed, whether that meant adoption or a group home.

He even tried to turn himself in, but once they found his father all his truths were a child’s elaborate lies and the beating he would be subjected to make those frail attempts few and far between, before completely becoming nonexistent. 

He pulls the baby closer, balancing himself so he can use his worn sleeve to wipe away some of the nasty shit the kid secreted off the baby’s face. The infant makes an odd ‘gah-eeeaa’ like sound, similar to a grunt, face twisting akin to annoyance before relaxing his scrunched up features. Reaching out to hold his own chilled cheeks. 

The touch is warm, soft, and the thin nails bite a little uncomfortably at his skin but he welcomes it with a barely there smile twitching at his lips. The boy coos at him, an impossibly wide smile of gums and giggles. There’s something different about this one. Maybe it’s just the night, maybe it’s just his vulnerability as of late, or perhaps he’s at a point where he needs to have a real reason to live, a purpose. To become the hope for this child without a future. He knows he’s making an impossibly irresponsible decision, but his mind dismisses the thought of changing it.

“It’s Levi you little shit machine.” 

“Breeeleee,” the infant responds and Levi’s smile is more than just a tiny twitch. 

“Not bad, we’ll work on it.” 

(*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノ

It proves more difficult than he could have ever imagined to keep the boy safe. Levi hides the boy in his usual hiding place in his home, but that leaves himself vulnerable. His old man is rarely ever at home, but when he is he makes his presence known. Levi lost count of the welts and bruises littered over himself, it’s miraculous that the man hadn’t found out about the boy so far. Though in retrospect, you have to be coherent to put two and two together. He was glad they lived in an apartment, at least this way he could pass off any tell-tale sounds as the neighbors. 

It had only been a couple weeks since he found the brat. More often than not, to be safer, he took the child out of the home and to the local stores to sit in the food courts and lobbies. The brat proved useful in receiving small handouts from strangers that would pass by but stop to fawn over the little tike. He had to lie when they asked how old the child was, he really didn’t know, but he had settled to the response of just under a year. He would usually end up telling them a lie and say they were waiting for their parents to finish shopping, or finish working. It was enough to dismiss the more suspicious ones.

Though he could go without the praise of being such a good older brother, and he certainly could go without the jaw gritting irritation at how they interacted with his “little brother”, but that aside the food and drinks were nice so he, begrudged or not, accepted them as politely as he could manage. 

He would return late in the evening when the shops closed. It was too cold to stay outside, and though he knew he could tolerate it, he refused to put his little shit minion in danger. Taking care of him, outside of just hiding him, proved to be more than a chore. He made make shift diapers, which made him feel unbelievably guilty. He had to wash them in the sink, with little more than dish soap. It was appalling for him to have to scrub them by hand, but he couldn’t risk his father seeing shit and piss covered cloth in their wash. 

Baby food provided much easier to steal, or obtain, than diapers, so he kept a little stash under his bed. Sometimes he could convince customers at the stores to buy it for him with a made up story. 

‘I lost the money mom gave me to buy my brother food,’ he would say pitifully. 

Even though it nearly killed him to have to do so, if it was for the little rug rat he would tolerate it.

Though the pressing need to be free of his guardian’s grasp and move to a safer more conducive environment for the kid, was at the fore front of his mind. The big question was how exactly to go about it? He was a year too young to get a job, unless he could find something under the table, but even then he didn’t have anyone to watch the kid, so that was out. If he could find someone to watch him, perhaps a day care? 

Which would be perfect if he had some cash. The real conundrum was getting cash so he could get a job to make cash, and there was no guarantee he could even find the work he needed right away. 

He didn’t really have any material possessions he could pawn, neither did his father. Though, his father’s wallet was another thing all together. He was sure he didn’t carry large sums of money, but it was possible he could pinch a few bucks here and there and get what he needed. He knew the man collected unemployment and child support, which was usually deposited directly into his account. Every time the man went out he pulled some cash. Thankfully, his favorite bar to frequent was cash only, the only problem lie in the inconsistency of his nights out at said bar.

Flawed as it was, Levi did as he so hap hazardously planned. Over the next couple weeks, he waited till his old man was out cold before locating his wallet and pocketing a few bills. It went well in the beginning, thee,oh so responsible, parent too hung-over in the mornings to remember how much he had spent the nights before. 

But his luck was bound to run out, after all, it always did.

The same day he secured an interview with a local shop owner for the following day, shit hit the fan. He only need a couple more dollars, just a couple more to have enough for the day care to watch the brat for him. He was as careful as always, heel to toe as he distributed his weight as carefully as possible. The second he reached the wallet, the very instant his hand felt the worn cool leather material, a vice grip nearly crushed his wrist and his eyes turned on his old man with shock. 

It all happened to quickly after that. He struggled, guarded against what hits he could, making sure to protect his head if nothing else. It wasn’t until he was dragged to his room that his throat seized. He knew what would happen, and he forced himself not to look at the closet, praying he could keep silent enough not to stir the younger. A word of praise for his compliance as his wrists were bound by a belt, his stomach knotting in response. 

He wanted to spit, curse, yell, but this wasn’t new, but it hadn’t come to this in such a long time. Levi’s eyes squeezed shut as he tried to think of anything else other than the hands tearing at his clothing and the sickening man breathing heavy from alcohol and what he chose not to put a name on. The only thought prominent on his mind, circled and repeated, ‘your own child. Doing this to your own child.’ 

Try as he might he couldn’t bare the pain that ripped him raw. The scream that tore through his throat just as agonizing as the pain that tore at him below. 

Soon following, his heart froze in his chest. Not at the man on top of him, no. No, it was the shrill scream of the child he hid. It was the moment his ‘father’ stopped, perplexed at the too familiar sound. It was when the male shoved himself off Levi and stalked closer to the noise that he felt a rush through his body, a strength he never knew he had. His mind supplying him only one command, Protect him. 

His father didn’t even manage to get his hand on the door knob before he launched himself at the man. He looped his arms over his head and took his bound wrists against the man’s throat, shoving his foot into the back of his head when he felt back against the floor. It was a strange angle but Levi pulled back on his arms and pushed forward with his foot as hard as he could, using his other leg to help push against his shoulder.

He watched the man convulse and try to pull at the belted wrists at his neck, but Levi only leant backwards to put more force into it. 

He wasn’t sure when the man stopped. The fifteen year old only hearing the blood pumping in his ears and the fast heavy gasps of air from his own lungs. He didn’t know how much time he stayed like that after he asphyxiated the older man. It was only after the ringing in his ears died down that he heard the boy’s cries and rushed to him, the adrenaline allowing him a reprieve from the pain. 

Once he reached him, once he pulled the baby in his arms and let his body sink against the wall, he relaxed with a choked sort of chuckle. The boy that lay, now silent and content, on his chest threading his little fingers into his bare skin. Levi sighed, told the kid he was ok, they would be ok, and despite knowing full well he was neck deep in shit and then some, he actually felt like it might just turn out fine. 

(*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノ

Disposing of the body wasn’t easy. He couldn’t dump it. He was using the man’s credit and debit cards till he managed to make his own money. Thankfully, he had some time left before the renewal of unemployment and food stamps, and a couple years’ worth of support checks. Only problem being, if someone found the man glass eyed and pant less, there was really no way he could explain it, and he would easily lose the money, lose his freedom, lose the kid, and he couldn’t allow that. 

He was no Jeffery Dahmr, but he’d be lying if he said the man didn’t give him ideas on how to go about this. The details are completely unnecessary, it’s just simpler to summarize that the man was reduced to resemble ground beef. Who would question throwing away bad meat? 

The aftermath, the trauma of it, because no one in their right mind could possibly stomach what he had to do without some type of mental scarring, he cleaned. He bleached and scrubbed and wiped down every surface within reach. Levi didn’t stop until the apartment was bare, white, sparkling. It was only when the boy, free to crawl to his hearts’ content, whined for his attention that he stopped. 

Levi picked him up and smiled softly. The only creature alive able to draw out such a rare expression from him. The boy grabbed his noise and cooed a broken rendition of his name. 

“Ah,” Levi mumbled, “I guess it’s about time you go by a name other than brat, huh, you little shit?”

The boy only giggled, batting his hand at Levi’s nose playfully. Levi in response squinting his eyes and chuckling back. 

“Well aren’t you just vicious,” he scrunched up his nose and wiggled it against the small hand.  
“How about Eren.”  
The boy giggled and squirmed and Levi took that as an affirmative, not that the kid really had a choice. Saint, he believed it meant, if he remembered correctly. It was true that Eren suited the boy. And Eren to him was indeed a saint. Innocent, untainted and pure, unlike him. Unlike Levi, Eren hadn’t had to face the harshness of the world. Too young to know pain, resentment, fear. 

As far as Levi was concerned he would never allow Eren to be exposed to such things. All he needed now in this world was Eren, and Levi would provide Eren with all he needed. A possessiveness gripped hold of his heart, the desire to protect him driving this feeling home. Eren was his, and he was Eren’s. He kissed his forehead gently, tilting his head slightly to the side, laughing softly when Eren mimicked him as well. 

“I won't let anyone hurt you.”

(*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノ

Eren grows up fairly quickly. Levi’s grateful the days of diapers are done with. Over the past five years he managed to do well for them. As soon as he was able, he stopped taking Eren to the day care center. One incident with another younger child was enough of a warning for Levi that he could not handle Eren being bullied, even by another toddler. 

He got the phone call a few weeks prior, apparently Eren wanted to share a toy and a young boy, whose language was little more than shit foaming through his teeth, shoved Eren away and told him to play elsewhere. Eren not understanding the conflict stood there confused. The other boy called him a few names, in that ever so refined language of his, and threw the toy at Eren. Eren, full of tears, grabbed the toy and threw it back as hard as he could. The staff ended up pulling the two apart in the end. 

Once the child’s mother and himself were called in and informed of the incident Levi’s blood boiled. It took all his will not the kick the little bastard straight into his mother’s, ungracefully aging, face. 

They’re young, she told him, and kids’ behave that way. Though, twenty or not and probably no less than ten years this mother’s junior, he told her what he thought was the more likely theory. Needless to say, telling a woman, in front of the staff no less, that the most useful part of her son’s personality was the shit stain she left on her oversized drawers, didn’t fly over so well. 

He didn’t mind pulling Eren from the day care, he actually preferred it. After the money started to run out, Levi had already taken the necessary steps in securing a job. He bought a computer, not brand new, some chump didn’t know how to repair a simple error, so he posted it on craigslist for cheap thinking it was broken. He obviously didn’t know much about computers at first, but shortly after his father’s untimely death, he dove into as many tutorials and books as he could. 

Youtube really was a wonder. He spent hours reading over how to write code, memorized the syntax, then moved on to learn the math, physics, and science behind it all. He managed to freelance work at a small company while Eren was being watched at the day care. But now he had enough money and knowledge to move his office back home. 

The prospect of staying home with Levi all day had overwhelmed the brat. Despite knowing better to keep things clean and tidy, Eren jumped up and down on their bed the following morning, excitedly giggling and playing with Levi’s face. 

They spent that morning carefree. Levi grumbling out of his interrupted sleep and rising abruptly, arms raised out in front of him, locked and wrists limp. Eren let out a gasp of surprise, whispering his name to ask if he was ok. Levi just groaned and shifted his cool grey orbs to Eren’s bright eyes.

“Hungry.”

The one word was moaned as Levi pretended to stumble forward to grab Eren in his arms, the boy squeaking with laughter as Levi grabbed hold of him and pretended to chomp on his tummy.

“Ah ha No, No Leevi, you can’t eat my tummy!”

Levi stopped and look up at the boy blinking, “No?”

“Noooooo siiiiilly!”

He paused as if in thought, “…. Well, what about… your feet!”

Eren burst out laughing as Levi pulled his lips over his teeth and made more munching noises as he gently and playfully chewed on his feet.

 

“Leeeeeeeeeeevi you can’t,” he huffed between his laughter having to stop ever so often, “You have to eat cereal! Ha ha you can’t eat meeeeeee.”

Levi stopped again and raised a brow releasing Eren’s heel from his mouth, “Huh, that so?”

“Yeaaaaaaah!”

“Are you sure, because your feet are tasty.”

“Leeeeeevi,” the boy whined, smile still evident on his face. 

“Alright, alright,” he set the boy down on the bed and ruffled his hair. Eren just scrunched his shoulders and bowed with weight of the hand in his hair, smile wider than ever.

(*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノ

Five more years pass in the blink of an eye. They have a new home now. It’s spacious, new, and cleaner than he could ever get the apartment they grew up in, no matter how much copious amounts of bleach he had at his disposal. 

Eren’s ten now, and rambunctious as ever, and just as curious. Levi chose to home school Eren, obtaining all the necessary permissions. He spends less and less time at his own computer, having developed an OS (operating system) that was fairly successful on the market. Whenever he had some time to himself, usually the times Eren watched TV or went to sleep, he would make a couple apps and sell those as well. At this point in their lives they were never in any need, and had he not found Eren the way he did, he probably would’ve never gotten to this position in life on his own. 

Eren gave him a continuously growing sense of purpose. He was happy in his new life with Eren, and he was happier that Eren himself was happy just being with him. Eren never called him dad, thank heavens, his heart couldn’t take that. Though on few occasions he did call him big brother. For the most part Levi tolerated this, in a sense he supposed he was like a big brother. He was over protective, and he supported the brat in everything he could, more so even. He never had a sibling himself, thus nothing to compare Eren and himself too, but he supposed it was close enough if not more ideal than typical siblings. 

“Leevi?”  
“Are you ever going to pronounce that correctly?” 

Eren’s eyes scrunched up in mirth, “But I like calling you Leevi, Leevi!”

The boy tugged on his shirt and sighed, “I want a bath.”

Levi scoffed and batted away Eren’s hand, though not in a very convincing manner to actually dismiss him, “You know where the tub is.”

“I want a bath with big brother!” 

“Aren’t you getting a little too old for this,” he teased but he honestly hated that it was the truth. Eren was getting older, growing up, and he was only growing older. Eren admittedly was a very complacent child, though he did have his moments of frustration, but they were just as endearing, albeit after the fact, as his obedience.

“I’ll never be too old to take a bath with you,” Eren pouted, actually offended at the notion. 

Levi resigned himself, he wouldn’t mind a hot bath really. He ruffled Eren’s hair as he passed, making note that he would need to trim the unruly brown locks soon. 

“One could only hope,” he waved his hand backwards, “Hurry up, I won’t wait for you.”

“Coming,” Eren shouted excitedly, bounding past him to the bathroom. 

Once in the tub, much to his annoyance and oddly enough relief, Eren asked him to clean his hair and wash him off. He was grateful that he could still take this time to lavish the kid with attention. He always loved splashing in the tub with Eren when he was younger. So much so, he didn’t mind having to mop the floors from all the water that escaped the tub, and he loved taking the time to clean him thoroughly. It gave him a sense of pride to wipe off any offensive dirt or grime clinging to Eren. It comforted him immensely, there was nothing more to it than what he assumed was his awful development of OCD. 

The thought that in a couple years this too would be deemed inappropriate caused him to frown as he continued to wash the boy’s arms and back. It wasn’t that there was anything behind their baths. They weren’t blood related but that didn’t make a difference in terms of their relationship. He was the care taker and Eren was the child in his care. Nothing more, nothing less. He would never subject Eren to anything, he himself, was forced to experience early on in life. Would never even dream of it. It was just a shame that society would deem such an innocent activity as inappropriate when the age gap conflicted. 

Even now, at ten and twenty five, he was sure people would find it strange, but they were both comfortable. Levi simply decided he would continue as they were until Eren grew uncomfortable with it. 

They sometimes bathed together, like they were now. They shared a bed, it was a king sized mattress, that damn near took up his whole room, but Eren insisted he wouldn’t sleep without Levi, so the man felt obligated to buy a bigger mattress to fit the two of them plus room to toss and turn. It wasn’t often that they argued, but when they did the space was appreciated, not that it mattered by morning. No matter how upset Eren was with him, he would always wake up with the brat curled to his stomach.

“Leevi,” Eren said softly, sitting in front of Levi Indian style in the tub with his hands on his ankles, head and neck arched backwards while the other male scrubbed suds into his hair. Levi prompted him to continue with a low ‘hmm’.

“Promise we can always be like this.”

“I promise,” it was soft, firm, and without hesitation, because he truly hoped that nothing would ever change between them. Could never fathom the two of them growing apart in anyway. 

A warm smile spread across Eren’s still slightly plump cheeks, “Love you Leevi.”

Levi’s hands only stuttered for a second as his own uncharacteristic smile wormed its way on his lips, “You too brat.”

(*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノ

Five more years, five more years and Eren turned fifteen, things began to change. It was subtle at first, nervous gestures, outbursts or not matching his gaze altogether. Curiosity had sparked in the young boy, innocent in nature, but not in the reality of it. Levi woke, half out of his sleep in the middle of the night and went stiff. It wasn’t abnormal to have Eren still latch onto him when they slept, but it was an entirely different matter when the boys’ fingers wandered over his bare chest, tracing the outlines of muscle. It wasn’t until the fingers moved to his hip that he had finally spoken up. Eren freezing as he apologized with some lame excuse before laying his hand flat on Levi’s stomach and wishing him a good night’s sleep. 

They didn’t breach that topic the next day. At least, not until the night he woke up to the rather disturbing sounds of Eren, at the other end of the bed, pleasuring himself. It crossed a line then, it crossed it the moment he came with Levi’s name husky on his breath. Silently sneaking his way to the bathroom, trying not to wake Levi up, unaware that the male was very much awake, back facing the boy but eyes wide staring at the digital screen of his alarm clock. 

Levi was disturbed at what he just over heard and more so disgusted with himself at the reaction it evoked in him. 

It wasn’t long after that Levi would find himself sleeping on the couch at times, unable to handle the hormonal teen. Their relationship became a bit strained, but he tried to keep it as normal as possible. Bathing together was an absolute no no at this point, he honestly didn’t feel comfortable even changing in front of him anymore. 

Ever since that night it was easy to see the lingering stare of Eren’s green eyes examining him. Becoming hyper sensitive to noticing how Eren would find any excuse to linger closer to him. Touching his arm when he spoke, letting his head rest in his lap while Levi was reading, and physical contact was met at every opportunity, the brunette made sure of that. While Levi would have accepted that before as a quirk of their relationship, now the normality of it was gone. He hated that it came to this, and that things were warped and couldn’t revert back. 

He missed the toddler he hid from his tormentor all those years ago. Missed the joy of watching Eren take his first steps, feed himself for the first time, talk for the first time, say he loved him for the first time. He missed all the little mannerisms and things in between. Most of all he missed when they were still innocent, and when he didn’t think of them beyond that innocence. He truly wished he remained ignorant of the whole situation. If nothing else, if he could have any wish at all in this fucked up scenario, it would be not to realize that Eren’s suggestiveness wasn’t getting the better of him. 

“We need to talk.” 

That short phrase would set off a series of events that would forever change the dynamics between the two. 

The conversation was awkward. It was tip toed then abruptly shoved, and Eren did what any normal adolescent teen would do, he rebelled. 

“It was never a problem before,” Eren shouted with flushed cheeks and knotted shoulders, “stop treating me like a kid!” 

“You are a kid Eren, and don’t be stupid, you know damn well why it’s a problem now,” he schooled his rising temper into an authoritative tone trying not to let this blow to out of proportion.

“What’s wrong with it,” Eren cried, angry tears gathering in his eyes, daring to step forward and grab hold of Levi’s shirt. The fabric bunched between his clenched fingers. 

“You’re ‘fifteen’,” he annunciates Eren’s age, his hands twitching at his sides, wanting to do nothing more than comfort the brat in front of him. 

“So fucking what?!”

“Eren,” his voice dropped a level. He watched the boy flinch at the tone causing a grimace to work its way across his face. 

“I love you.”

Eren’s voice, hardly above a whisper, meek and delicate caught his ear. He kept repeating that damned phrase, over and over again, and each time Levi felt his heart squeezed more and more. He didn’t want this for Eren. He didn’t want the boy to ever feel hurt or hopeless, never wanted him to cry or feel at a loss, and he certainly never wanted himself to be the cause of it. He wanted to protect Eren with his life, with everything he had; whatever he had left and then some, but a boy so young. He couldn’t do what Eren was asking, what Eren didn’t realize he was asking for. He couldn’t, no matter what effect those words now had on him. 

“Leevi,” the boy looked up pitifully and Levi swallowed the knot in his throat.

He beckoned for Eren to come closer, wrapping his arms around him, pressing his cheek against Eren’s. He had grown so tall over the years, and Levi knew he would soon tower over him. It was embarrassing enough that he was already shorter than the kid, honestly having to tilt Eren’s head forward a bit just to rest cheek to cheek, but he was his, freakishly tall or not. 

“You don’t understand what you’re asking of me,” Levi said this carefully and adding before Eren could interject, “You’re all I have Eren, I love you, you know that. If you just used that noggin of yours you’d realize I’d do anything for you.”

“Then why can’t…”

“Anything Eren,” Levi interrupted, offering a squeeze of his arms to punctuate the point, “But not that. I won’t take that away from you.” 

Honestly, he was sure Eren didn’t understand the implication. He knew, upset as he was, that things were not going in his favor and for now it would be best to drop the topic. Eren trusted Levi, knew that everything Levi did was for him, and there were reasons for each of his decisions. Frustrating or not, he knew better to question them, but he wasn’t perfect and he wanted, knew he wanted, whatever this feeling was. 

Not what he felt when he was younger, no longer did he want to consider Levi his big brother. His fondness of the older male changed at some point, not that he could pin point when. From simple admiration to a longing adoration, all he had known was Levi and all he wanted was Levi. 

Time flew past the two, both stepping on eggs shells around each other. Wanting to remain close but trying to keep an appropriate distance. Eren soon moved into the spare room, and asked Levi if he could attend a public school. 

He wasn’t thrilled at the idea. He didn’t like the possibility of ending up with Eren drifting further apart from him, but given the circumstances he didn’t know what other choice he had. He frightened himself with the thought that he didn’t want Eren to leave his sight. He didn’t want Eren to look to anyone else, wanted to solely own the boys attention, Eren was all he needed and he wanted Eren to feel that way about him. However, with the complication of Eren’s attraction to him, it could end up dangerous on his part. He couldn’t leave to chance the possibility of his feelings for Eren becoming any more complex than they already were. 

School could help Eren, would help him as well. At least that was his hope, and yet again he found the case to be exactly opposite. 

A year went by then two. Eren gained two close friends over that time, Armin and Mikasa. Levi was happy to know they were very protective of Eren. If nothing else he had that solace. Though the closer the three became, the more they pried into their lifestyle, the more they dug under his skin, the more he had to admit to himself this foreign festering in the pit of his gut was jealousy. 

Eren, of course, complained that he wasn’t nice enough to his friends, and he was right to complain. Levi really had no reason, at least no logical reason for the way he was acting. But no matter how hard he tried to remain civil, he still perpetually frowned, still clipped his sentences short and often responded with little more than a grunt of affirmation. He could tell the girl didn’t like him, always putting a mock show of respect. He had noticed on more than several occasions, due to how thin the walls were in the home, that she would sometimes question himself to Eren. 

Each time Eren would only laugh and tell her how she had nothing to worry about. That, for him, Levi was his most important person and they would do anything for each other. He would brag about his ‘Leevi’ till Mikasa or Armin would change the subject for him in favor of not having to hear him ramble on for hours on the topic. 

He felt an overwhelming sense of pride in those moments, despite Eren using his little nickname with his friends. It almost buried the raging thought to toss the teens out of his house so he could have Eren all to himself again, almost, or perhaps it made it worse. 

(*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノノ゛☆ (*゜▽゜ノ

Levi lowered himself in the tub of hot water with a loud sigh. Eren should be returning from school shortly, it was almost summer and he felt unbelievably grateful for it. The time Eren spent away left an empty void to open up in his being. He hated not having the brunette home, and it alarmed him just how dependent he realized he was on Eren being there with him. 

He honestly considered, more times than he cared to admit, pulling Eren out of school to be home schooled again. Sharing hours of the day together, whether it was spent academically or not meant the world to him. Eren’s presence alone soothed him and set his mind at ease. He needed that peace, he wondered if he could somehow talk Eren into it, and when the topic of college came up, he wondered if he could then to convince Eren to take online courses from home. 

He was growing, and he was curious. He god damned well made it obvious that his curiousness was healthy. It was hard enough not having the boy next to him at night, the difficulty he had lately in finding sleep evident enough by the dark circles forming under his eyes, but he couldn’t fathom Eren being gone. 

Morbid thoughts of locking Eren away, somehow keeping him enclosed in this small space with himself for the rest of his life, made him shiver. Even more so when he actually considered doing just that. The ideas were prominent, more than ever before. Similar to the day he decided to take Eren home with him, or when he stole the life away from the man he had called his father to protect the brat, his state of mind whispered dangerously to him that it would be ok as long as it was to protect Eren; they needed each other and all they needed were one another. The more these gray areas expanded the less he felt he would be doing any wrong. Eren loved him after all.

Perhaps, Levi rested his head back against the cold porcelain tub, covering his face with his hands, “I need to protect him from myself,” he finished the thought aloud. 

He heard the sound of the front door opening and closing in the other room, along with the clink of keys against the counter. Footsteps edged closer to the bathroom door, along with the shuffling of paper; more than likely the mail. 

“Leevi,” the door edged open and Eren stepped in eyeing the mail envelopes in his hands, “a couple bills came in, and my grades too.” 

“You know where to put the bills, tell me your grades,” Levi dropped his hands in the water and stared up at the ceiling. He debated on telling Eren to leave, but he was honesty to drained to put up a fight. 

When he didn’t hear the sound of the paper tearing and furrowed his brow and looked to the side, “What are you waitin…”

Eren pulled off his shirt, envelops neatly stacked and placed on the edge of the sink. He tossed the article in the laundry basket before tugging off his belt and slipping out of his pants. Levi caught himself staring at the movements. The muscles on Eren’s body developed quite nicely, no baby fat left at all. He would be eighteen soon, give or take a month or so, and over these years Eren had filled out to be an attractive and well-built young man. He wasn’t bulky, his chin wasn’t completely squared, but he had a strong jaw line and compact muscle, he still held a boyish charm to him but he could easily pass for someone older. 

Levi felt his cheeks warm at the prevailing thoughts invading his mind and forced himself to look up at Eren’s face, “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I had gym today. I could use a bath,” he stated simply stripping himself of his boxers and moving towards the tub. 

“Eren.” 

“It’s fine, just like before ok? I wont…”

He didn’t need to finish, but Levi himself was more worried about what he would or wouldn’t do. Despite this he scouted back in the tub, in favor of having Eren submerge his lower half away from his eyes, who at the moment, were fighting a losing battle. 

Levi scoffed as the boy had to sit with his knees pulled to his chest to fit in front of him.

“You really are too big for this you know,” Levi said this and couldn’t hide the crestfallen tone in his voice. 

Whether on habit or not, even with his remark, he grabbed the sponge and began cleaning Eren’s back moving to his arms. The boy let out a contented sigh as he let his head fall back.

Levi swallowed as he glanced over Eren’s slightly parted lips and relaxed features. He really was handsome, more so by the day, and it bothered him to no end that he took note of that. It was one thing to refer to him as handsome, it was another to physically be bothered by that attractiveness. When Eren leaned further back and asked for Levi to clean his hair, it gave him a clear shot of his extended neck and throat. 

The raven bit hard on the inside of his lip to reprimand himself for the urge to bite down on the soft area of flesh. It couldn’t kill the epiphany of, if he left a mark, if he claimed that throat for all to see, they would know Eren was taken. They would know that he was his, and his alone. 

That single awareness turned his throat dry as his mind supplied him with the possibilities. If he bit down and sucked the skin of, not just his neck, but his arms, his back, his torso, his chest, his legs, it excited him, pitiful as he felt, knowing that when Eren would change in his gym class the evidence left behind would deter any pursuers. Would know that one look would declare every inch of Eren’s was taken, every part of him his. 

These notions troubled him, and he grew more distraught by his own enthusiasm. He shouldn’t think like this, he shouldn’t, he raised Eren, he watched him grow, this wasn’t his intention, it wasn’t what he thought he wanted for them. It wasn’t right, it wasn’t right. 

“Get out.”

Eren’s brow furrowed and didn’t move until he heard the command once more in a strained voice. The second time Eren sat up carefully and twisted his hips and head toward Levi, utter confusion written in his features. 

“Why whats….” 

Eren clamped his mouth shut as he scanned over how tense Levi was. His brows were tightly drawn together, his grey eyes focusing on the tiled wall, his cheeks were flushed and his lip caught between his teeth. Eren was at a loss until Levi, realizing Eren was analyzing him, briskly moving to cover himself, throwing a harsher command for Eren to leave him in the process. 

Eren’s own cheeks burned as he put two and two together. If Levi thought he was leaving now he was damn well bloody wrong. Instead, Eren turned in the tub, his knees facing Levi in the limited space. He grabbed each of Levi’s wrists to pull them apart which earned him a harsh glare. Levi himself hardly amused.

“Brat I wont…” 

Eren leaned his weight on his wrists and leaned forward to place a kiss on Levi’s neck. The raven raised his shoulders and shrugged his head to prevent the kiss. 

“Its Ok.”

“No, no its not. Eren this isn’t Ok. How things are right now is not Ok.”

“Levi why can’t you just..”

“Just what Eren,” Levi fumed as he reversed the hold on his wrists and forced Eren back in the tub, his weight shifting on top of him which only made matters worse in his current condition. He was too vulnerable, his emotions too raw, it wasn’t supposed to be like this. Eren was just a kid, he was his, his only reason for living, but he was still just a kid. Any man at 32, especially one who raised said brat, would never dream of anything beyond a platonic relationship. There was something wrong with him, he knew, but he couldn’t keep up his own façade. 

“It’s fine if its mutual isn’t it? I’m seventeen now,” Eren shot desperately, uncomfortable in his position but breath heating up at the proximity of their bodies, “I love you! I love you more than a brother, more than a parent, I want more than those measly titles. You feel it too don’t you? Don’t you love me the same way?”

He was falling into depravity he knew. He couldn’t deny himself, couldn’t deny Eren, he was failing at the thing he wanted to protect Eren from the most, his own yearning. 

Without thinking he dove on Eren’s neck, using taste, a sense he denied himself so many times over this past two years. He marked him, appreciating the new sounds that aroused from Eren’s throat. Mesmerized by the soft whine and unfamiliar touch of Eren gripping his back, nails biting into his skin. He nipped at his collar bone and left the skin bruised there as well for good measure. 

He was grounded when Eren threw his hips into his, stopping what he had begun he placed a hand at the back of Eren’s head and placed their foreheads together in a way that allowed him to stare directly into his eyes. 

“You are mine,” Levi clarified, glancing at Eren expectantly. 

“I was always yours.”

Always his, would always be his. He translated this to Eren and so much more, spilled out every dirty desire of claiming him for his own. Every word elicited Eren’s promises to him, reiterating every one of Levi’s wishes, word for word. The possessiveness he felt, the need that stung him, the emptiness of not having Eren with him at all times. His obsession took Eren back, but he was happy, happy that Levi wanted him all to himself. 

Levi pulled the boy into his lap and held him close, speaking into the side of his neck as he continued.

“If this happens. If I allow this, Eren you are mine. Only mine. You’ll love only me, you’ll grant any wish I make, and you’ll give yourself to me the way I will continue to give myself to you. Live for me like I live for you. I love you Eren, more than you would ever know. Now tell me the same, tell me you’ll love only me.”

“I’ll only love you Leevi,” Eren wrapped his arms around Levi just the same, pressing as close as their bodies would allow as he wound his hands into Levi’s hair. 

“Tell me you’re mine.”

“I’m yours. I’ll always be yours. I love you, I love you.”

Levi knew he was done for, those words and phrases did things to his psyche that he would never be able to undo. Holding Eren in his arms he mused that fate had a funny way of working out, maybe this was meant to happen all along, and from this point on there was nothing left to hold him back.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright... after much debating on my part I decided I really - like - the idea of using yandere!Levi's character and I really want to play around with these two/their relationship/developments and/or lapses in sanity etc. so on so forth..... so ..... I'm scraping the two shot idea..... I won't promise how many chapters this will end up being -- I'm not going to drag it out too much I just have a few directions I would like to go with this and well.... We'll see. 
> 
> I hope this works out -- I hope you guys like it -- I hope you guys also have tissues ( or tampons ) to shove up your noses because... well.... this is like pretty much smutty.....

Levi drummed his finger over the top of his coffee cup. The black liquid steaming against the palm of his hand. He didn’t bother to move it, ignoring the way it heated his skin uncomfortably, too distracted by the loud tick of the clock and the prevalent thoughts floating in his head. He stayed like this, hunched forward with his opposite hand holding up his head, hair pushed back with his palm on his forehead, fingers digging into his scalp and elbow bent on the table, since Eren left this morning. Only moving to refill his cup or take a leak. The darkness under his eyes had only gotten worse as of late. He only had stress and himself to blame. 

He had been reflecting on the barrage of thoughts he’d been, and currently was having about Eren. The seventeen year old, being as stubborn as he was, had been pushing Levi to his worst. The raven, now more than ever, wanted Eren all to himself. He never imagined the feeling growing to be so much stronger than before. He should have assumed this would happen, if he accepted the teen’s advances. Which was one of many reasons to avoid falling into these desires in the first place. But now, as things were, he couldn’t make them stop. His lips pulled into a tight, thin line, holding the inside corners of his lip between his teeth. Eyes slid to the clock on the wall, it was already nearing six o’clock. 

This was Eren’s last day in public school. The boy was reluctant to agree to home schooling again, but had none the less, he had obliged. It was one of the many conditions Levi laid out for him, and he choose to accept. Eren choose to accept all the selfish requests he made that night. Transitioning their relationship in this manner, he knew all too well, would not just alter his unstable mindset but serve an entrée of repercussions for the both of them. 

Even so, he couldn’t stop himself. When he thought about it, after establishing where Eren and he lie, it seemed inevitable; something akin to fate. When it came to Eren, from the time he took him in till now, he would do anything and everything within his power and beyond it to appease him. This type of devotion he had given time and time again, continued to and wished to dote on till his last breath, could be nothing other than love. The physical aspect, something that hadn’t developed until much later, and something that still left him both thrilled and uneasy, was veering into unfamiliar aspect of their love for one another. It was fresh, exciting, and downright frightening.

All these thoughts aside, he wanted Eren home. Now. From the clock, his eyes wandered to the keys sitting on the table. The urge to hop into his car and drag the brunette home was compelling. He winced as he bit down harder on the inside of his lip to quell the thought. Pulling his mug to take a sip of bitter caffeine, he tilted his head back but his eyes remained on the keys all the same. Placing the cup down, he scowled, and turned sideways in his chair. Crossing his legs and hanging his arm over the back of the chair he glared once more at the clock. 

Two minutes. Two fucking minutes passed. That was it, two measly minutes. 

He set to cleaning the already spotless space. If for nothing else it kept him busy, time would go by much faster, and Eren would be home sooner. By seven thirty, and no word for Eren, he felt his blood chilling. Eren wasn’t home, something was wrong. He should have called him the second he didn’t come back from school, at three. He refrained, only because he knew how unreasonable he was being to take Eren away from his friends, and figured the boy would want to spend some more time with them today. But what if he hadn’t stayed to idle about with friends? What if he was on his way home and something happened?

He cursed his negligence, he should have never let the boy leave his sight. If something were to happen to Eren. If anything were to happen to him…. Panic, one he hadn’t felt for years. The kind of panic he felt what seemed a lifetime ago, when his father nearly discovered the baby he hid away, gripped at his heart. The adrenaline, surging through his body, nearly churned his stomach to expel what little contents it held. Someone could have hurt him. He could be hurt. Eren could be hurt. 

At this moment, jumping to conclusions didn’t seem as ridiculous, rather, each scenario felt all too real. He could have been hit by a car, he could have gotten in a fight, he was a good looking boy, he could have… Someone could have…

He crossed into the bedroom and picked his phone off the charger, searching the device’s inbox for any messages. Nothing. Not a damn thing. He quickly hit send twice, throwing the phone to his ear before it even rang and unconsciously held his breath. By the second ring, he crossed back into the kitchen and snatched his keys off the table. Not bothering with a jacket he threw open the door. The fourth ring, still nothing. 

The cold air bit his skin, the winter chill settled in despite the lack of snow. He took a quick glance about, it was far too dark, even with the outdoor light dimly illuminating the driveway and front stoop. On the sixth ring, he waited before moving to his car. A bated breath as he hit the end button and rushed over. 

Cursing, he unlocked the door to his small Honda civic, slipping into the car, he attempted shut the door, turn the vehicle on, and click his belt all at once. Managing the door and turning the key in the ignition, he abandoned the belt, throwing his hand on the wheel he was about to pull the car into reverse when his cell phone went off. 

He didn’t waste the time to glance to see who it was, instead, quickly sliding his thumb over the screen, he pulled the phone to his ear. 

“Hello?” 

The tone was rushed, anxiety etched over the way he managed to speed up and elongate the single word all at once.

“Leevi? What’s wrong, are you alright?” 

Eren’s voice did so many things to him in a sequential rush of hyper accelerated emotions, which all seemed to slam into him all at once. Worry, that had given way to dread, subsided to relief, then immediately shifted to rage.

“Where are you,” the tone was low, dark, spoken through nearly clenched teeth. 

There was a pause, as if Eren was trying to assess the situation before answering. 

“I’m walking home now,” he said slowly, “I’m with Armin and Mikasa. We’re almost there. We’re close.” 

“Get here.”

He hung up on the boy when he heard Mikasa in the background, asking if everything was alright, along with an echo of Armin mirroring the question. He probably startled the boy on the phone, they’ve fought, but he’d never used such a tone with him before. 

Roughly turning the car off, he tore the keys from the ignition and slammed the car door on his way out. He stopped at the end of the driveway, hands shoved deep in his pockets as he scratched harshly at his thighs. He was fuming, the knot in his throat had dropped to his stomach. He tried taking a few calming breaths, but it did nothing for him. Instead, without any clue as to how long, he stood next to the sidewalk, waiting. 

When Eren saw him standing there without a jacket, he sprinted away from his friends. The concern on his face did little to help Levi’s frustration with the boy. Once he was within reach, Levi grabbed the front of Eren’s jacket and jerked him forward, bringing him at eye level. 

“Where were you?” 

Eren swallowed, brows knitted in confusion. 

“Leevi… your hands,” Eren reached his own to clasp the hand curled in his jacket. His opposite reaching to cup the fist at Levi’s side, “You’re freezing, how long have you been outside?” 

His voice was soft, Levi’s ears strained to hear it. Perhaps, Eren only meant to speak to himself, not trying to direct the words into an actual question. By this time, Armin and Mikasa were rushing over, alarmed and unsure of what was about to transpire. They both were weary of Levi, for whatever reason, and seeing the older man rip Eren towards him like a rag doll was certainly disarming. 

Levi brought Eren a little closer, barely an inch from his face. A million questions popped in his head, each one a demand of what, where, whens and why’s. It was pointless to ask, however, Eren was here. Eren was back and that’s all that mattered. His skin tingled with the numbing cold and he felt exhausted all of a sudden. It must have been the stress ironing itself out. 

Rather than chew the kid out, he shook his hand loose, “Get inside.”

“What’s going on,” the girls voice interrupted, a surge of protection stirring at Levi’s behavior. She was put off, sure, but Levi was in no mood to deal with her or the blonde for that matter. 

Levi’s head lifted slightly with a tilt, almost in way of challenge. This girl had no right to question his authority over Eren. The shadow’s hung over his eyes, menacing in the golden light of the street lamps above. 

“What’s going on? You were just leaving, and Eren is turning in for the night. Understood?”

The girl’s expression darkened. The blonde, Armin, grabbed her arm and softly hushed her; asking her to calm down. 

“It’s good to see one of you has more than just shit floating in those skulls of yours. Eren, inside. Now.”

Eren apologized quickly, telling his friends a few comforting words that Levi didn’t bother to listen to before running up to follow him back into the home. Once in the safety of their home, once Eren’s feet broke through the threshold and shut the door behind him, nervous and unsure of how Levi would reaction, he spun on him. 

Eren gasped when arms surrounded his, pinning them at his sides as Levi held him a bit too tightly. The crown of his head and the angle of his shoulders were all Eren could see in the awkward hold. He didn’t know what to say, what words would sooth him. So instead, he decided on resting his cheek against Levi’s head. It was awkward, the pull at the back of his neck from being stretched so far, uncomfortable, but he bore with it. 

“I’m sorry, I should have contacted you.”

“You damn right should have,” he growled out, voice raw.

He wasn’t expecting Levi to move as quickly as he did. In a blink of an eye, or at least what felt like it, Levi’s hands situated themselves under his jaw and digging into his hip. The squeeze he gave both areas forced a wince out of Eren. Searching Levi’s pinched gaze he waited for him to speak, not wanting to upset him anymore than he already had. Levi had never reacted this badly before. He must have really shook him up. Eren felt both prideful and guilty at that. Ashamed, really, at how proud and excited he was that Levi fretted over him this much. 

“I can’t lose you.” 

Eren shivered, the desperation behind those words saying volumes that the one sentence did not. He remained unsure of how to respond. Eren was never good with words. The delicate nature of this moment making him hesitate in uttering a single syllable. Licking his lips and swallowing, his eye lids drooped. It seemed inappropriate given the circumstance, but he couldn’t help himself. The way Levi held his chin and hip, painful as it were, aroused him. 

Whenever Levi became possessive, whenever he pinned him with his domination and absolute authority, he loved him most. Knowing he was the only one who could make Levi like this, his ‘Leevi’, no one else’s. It was both frightening and exhilarating, to mean so much to someone. To mean so much to the one person who had taken him in, raised him, taught him. In retrospect, most would be perturbed by the idea of the same man, related or not, nearly twice his age, watching him take his first steps and years later being the same one who would take his first real kiss. But for Eren, Levi was his world, he loved him, without any doubt, more than he could ever love another. 

Eren spoke Levi’s name in a whisper. He brought his hand up to gently pull Levi’s to slide from his jaw to the side of his skull. Moving in, he placed a kiss on the man’s lips. They parted ever so slightly in surprise, though it only took one more small movement of Eren’s against his for him to respond. 

Feverishly, Levi drove forward, Eren, losing balance, falling back against the door behind him. Their lips moving in tandem, Levi’s grip on his hip squeezing down to elicit another gasp, allowing him to rove over Eren’s tongue and confines of his mouth. Eren moaned at the bitter taste accompanied with Levi’s tongue. He never cared for black coffee, but for whatever reason, he found himself reconsidering it was all that bad. 

Levi’s hand dropped from his jaw to pull down the zipper of Eren’s jacket. More than ever he wanted to make Eren his, but he wanted to punish him all the same. He pulled the zipper down, tugging off the material and letting it fall, his hand settling on Eren’s jeans. Levi's lips found Eren’s pulse, smug at the rapid beating of his heart as he kicked off his shoes and jeans. 

Left in boxers and his long sleeve, Levi slid his hands up the sides of Eren’s thighs to his hips, taking his time to circle his hands, under the cotton fabric, around the small of his back to grab a handful of his backside. In an unexpected motion, he pulled Eren up to sit him against his hips, bringing his hands to guide thighs to wrap around his torso. Eren’s head fell back with a small noise from his throat, the thin material of his boxers doing little to mask the friction against his groin from the motion. 

Levi nipped at the faded marks on Eren’s collar bone, lapping at each area after he left a new set of uneven red and purple broken blood vessels. He led them further into the main room, making sure to kick off his own shoes before doing so. He laid Eren down on the sofa, supporting his weight as he did, not once allowing them to separate. Knee on the couch between his thighs, Levi left a particularly angry mark on the center column of Eren’s neck. Hiding his moan behind an unsteady breath as Eren cried out at the harsh suck. 

Lapping at the inflicted area, Levi kissed it gently before moving to support his weight on his elbow. He laid in such a way that he could brush back brown bangs with the same hand. Their faces not but a hairs breath away, Levi’s grey eyes locked with heavy green. 

“You should see your expression right now,” Levi teased as he moved to nip his ear. Tongue brushing the shell, Eren turned his head to the side to allow Levi to spoil him further. Levi happily obliged. Lips and teeth teasing the juncture between the back of Eren’s ear and neck and its surroundings. 

“You little shit,” he whispered husky in his ear, the warmth from his breath falling over the wet skin causing a chill. 

Levi’s whisper was dripping with aggravation, still disbelieving that he allowed himself to let this kid convince him to give in. Though he knew it was wrong, knew it was strange and improper for a man of his age, for a man with the relationship he had with Eren, to do something like this, to even think it, let alone act. But Eren was his, he wanted to be his, he wants him be his, a piece of his mind called out. Irresponsibility be damned. It was useless to battle himself over this again and again, the result was always the same. When it came to Eren, he knew, he couldn’t completely control himself. 

Eren was at a loss of what exactly to do with his hands, he simply settled on roaming them over Levi’s firm stomach and chest. At times stopping to knead the muscles underneath with small circular motions, and for the times that Levi’s attention caused his responses to drift, he dug his fingers into the pliant flesh. 

“Look what you’re doing to me,” Levi pulled Eren’s hand to brush against the growing bulge, satisfied at the bright blush that accompanies it. He releases his hand just as quickly, not wanting Eren to feel obligated in touching him. 

No, the goal was to torment the kid a little, get him worked up as a bit of pay back for not coming home sooner. He would physically count down every reason why Eren should ‘want’ to stay home with him. Convince him, as Levi himself was convinced, that no one else was needed in their lives to make it perfect. Physically, mentally, emotionally, they only needed each other. 

Levi sat back and instructed Eren to sit up as he began pulling the shirt above his head. With a chuckle, Levi stopped short of pulling the article of clothing off. Leaving Eren’s arms pinned upward and eyes hidden behind the collar of, the now, inside out shirt. 

Eren pouted, which only caused the adoring smirk to grow on his lips. He carefully adjusted his head to the side and gently blew, Eren turned his head at the source but he moved before their lips could meet. Again, Levi moved to the side, this time the tip of his tongue barely touching the corner of Eren’s lip. With a wiggle of his lips Eren turned again and was rewarded with a half kiss, before Levi shifted once more. 

The whine kept him playing at the cat and mouse game for a couple more minutes. He was having far too much fun with seeing a needy, pouting brat, trying desperately to capture his lips with his own. With a huff, Eren cried out Levi’s name in a breathless wail. Both their patience with teasing spent, Levi held Eren at his wrists and finally connected their lips. 

Eren hastily shrugged off his shirt the second Levi released his wrists, the older males fingers tracing his faintly defined chest. Fingers, barely touching, feathered across his nipples. The brunette blush is bright, embarrassed by the sounds escaping his lips, even more so when they only serve to make Levi even more eager to continue. 

The idea of how taboo this would be just a few weeks ago stirs in their thoughts. As they divulge in every inch of skin their hands, mouths and bodies could possibly cover, naturally, moving seamlessly, knowing exactly where to touch, the thought of this act, they were about to commit to, was forbidden seemed nothing short of absurd. Levi, especially, his tongue rolling over the hard bud of Eren’s nipple, couldn’t help but revel in how perfect this was. How right it felt to have Eren under him, under his tongue, under his hands, fingers, nails, teeth. 

“Levi, please. Please.” 

Levi allowed his breath to fan over Eren’s chest, “Please what Eren. I can’t give you something, if I don’t know what you want,” his tongue lazily drew a line up to his ear, giving it a small kiss just underneath it, “Tell me, Eren.” 

Eren whined again, hips bucking into Levi’s above him, “I don’t know… just.. I don’t… touch me… anything… I don’t know.. Leevi, please. I just want you, I just want you to… ahhh!” 

Levi’s pulled Eren’s cock out from the opening of his boxers, effectively ending his rambling with a long twisting stroke of his wrist. Levi continued to slowly twist his hand up and down, changing pressure as he reached the tip and base as he saw fit. At some point, Eren’s fingers dug into his shoulders. Eren, himself, panting and fidgeting under the treatment, as Levi licked his lips and relished the foreign ambiance of lewd sounds escaping his lips. 

He watched every arch of Eren’s brow, every parting of his moist lips, the way his neck curved as he flung his head to the back or side, he watched every minute detail as it past, wanting, selfishly, to see more. He wanted to see Eren become a mess, come undone, he wanted to wreck the boy beneath him in ways he would have never imagined he would wish for. 

Shifting down, he introduced his mouth and the reaction was astonishing. Eren’s breath hitched and voice moaned in such a pitch that it sent chills to quake under his skin. With vigor, Levi tested flattening his tongue, lapping under the head of his penis, sucking at the base and sliding up to encase the head. He told himself he would memorize every sweet spot, every nook and cranny of Eren’s being. He wanted to be able to cherish him, love him, and pleasure him, over and over. Be the only one capable, allowed to, spoil him in such a manner. 

Levi had to remind himself to have patience. He shouldn’t rush things. He needed to take his time, he wanted to learn every part of Eren before they took the next step. All the dirty things on his tongue he wanted to speak and act on would have to wait. 

Eren was his now, his and his alone. They had all the time in the world. There was no sense at all in rushing things and spoiling it. Every time together could make for a new discovery, sex could wait. He could wait, for now all he wanted to do was, for the first time, claim the boy beneath him and drink up every ounce of his essence he could offer.

When he felt blunt nails drag up his neck and pull at his hair, he knew Eren was close. Anticipation building, Levi felt himself close to the edge simply from knowing that ‘he’ was going to make ‘his’ Eren cum. The cry that shot from Eren’s mouth was as hot as the sperm that coated the inside of his mouth and throat. The view, as ribbons filled him, threatening to fall past his lips, of Eren’s eyes and brows shut and pinched, jaw loose in the now silent cry, chest constricting as he rode out his orgasm, was all the encouragement he needed for his own release. 

He couldn’t even feel embarrassed that he came from pleasuring Eren without so much as touching himself. If anything, the shudders of rapture he was experiencing, drove home just how powerful an influence Eren was, not just his mind, but also his body. 

His name off Eren’s lips, shook him. In what seemed effortlessly, Levi drew the boy up towards him and let them fall back to the opposite side of the couch. Eren’s arms wrapped around his torso, head pressed against Levi’s chest as the older male stroked through his hair and over his naked back. 

Peaceful, blissful, perfect. 

He whispered words of praise and love, listening to the rhythm of Eren’s breathing evening out as they took the time to savor each other’s warmth. In every aspect, no matter what way it was interpreted, Eren was his, his reason for living, his euphoria, Eren was all he needed, and he would ensure that he was all Eren would need in return.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has it been a while? I don't know -- honestly -- I have no concept of time -- But today was pretty productive -- 6+ hours in the computer lab finishing up my model of 3D gear and my animatic AND I ended up coming home with some inspiration to write this chapter! 
> 
> Not too shabby I say! 
> 
> This one -- this one we're going to see a little more of a collapse - sure it'll get worse - and sure I probably could've taken more time with it but fuck it - you guys deserve a chapter and I can always dive deeper in the next one -- all this means is there will be more chapters in the long run ^_^ 
> 
> Alright Alright I'm done ranting <3 Enjoy!!

The crisp night air bit his lungs. Small puffs of air formed visible dissipating clouds, briefly coming into view before being replaced by another breath. Levi dug his hands into his pockets, trying to get some feeling back into his fingers. One foot after the other, he kept his eye level forward. The debate of when said footsteps should lead back home, kept on hold till he finished the task at hand. 

Getting some more fucking coffee. 

He’d been consuming quite a bit as of late. Having Eren home, for the most part, was everything he thought it would be. He felt more at ease, relaxed. There wasn’t a sense of panic or urgency, because Eren was ‘there’. He was with him when he woke, throughout the day, and when he slept. The gap that had formed between them, during the more turbulent years, was near non-existent now. 

Caresses and feather light touches, were as common as breathing. Their lips always finding an excuse to press against exposed flesh. Whether it be cooking, cleaning, sitting down and watching a movie, they always made contact with each other. 

At first, most of the gestures came from Levi himself. Eren, who seemed as if he would be the more rambunctious and brazen of the two, took his time warming up to their physical relationship. Innocent or otherwise. Soon, however, Levi found arms winding his waist as he prepared their meals, and lips brushing and kissing his neck as he cooked, found Eren resting his head in his lap during movies as he traced his hand up and down Levi’s thigh, or even Eren, being so bold as to press against him as he scrubbed away, fingers tracing over the hem of his jeans to suggest a different activity that didn’t require bleach or cleaners. 

And though the relationship had never been better, and the transition to lovers flowing along smoothly, no paradise lacked a serpent lying in wait for a chance to strike. 

Eren, had been more than a little apprehensive when Levi refused his friends coming over. At first, it was nothing more than a pout and a mumble of ‘Maybe some other time’, but after a few more denials the brat did nothing short of pitching a fit. 

After a particularly nasty spat between the two, Levi finally relented. Mikasa, Armin, and some new comer, Jean, we’re all sitting cozy at his home, with his Eren, at this very moment. Thus, he stepped into the corner market to grab a, not so fresh, cup of coffee and an overpriced pound of Folgers ground beans. 

Taking the small bag with his purchase, he decided not to waste any time in heading back. It was bad enough having Mikasa and Armin loitering around, but this newcomer made him uneasy. He certainly lacked the proper manners and respect, more so for Eren than himself, but the two, in his mind, went hand in hand. There was no disrespecting Eren without disrespecting himself as well.  
Slipping out the door, as someone else made their way in, he began the return trek home. The hot beverage kept him left hand warmer. The chill in the air still tinting his cheeks and skin red. Perhaps he should consider the idea of moving. Some place warm, some place new. There were just too many memories here, good and bad alike, but it was a question whether he was willing to completely let them all go. 

Certain landmarks served as reminders, while the home he worked so hard for, the same home that saw Eren grow in leaps and bounds every year, housed more memories he would never wish to leave behind. 

When he sat in his living room and glanced about, he could recall Eren weaving through the furniture as he tried to outrun him, ‘the tickle monster’. 

He could remember hoisting the boy up and gliding him through the air on his dinosaur bean bag chair, in a successful attempt to get him to clean, swooping down to pick up his toys and tossing them in his toy chest as they passed by. 

He remembered how excited Eren was first going to school. How upset he was when his friend was being bullied, and how determined he was to protect him, even at his own expense. 

How he could take the utmost care in making sure didn’t wake him up when he crawled into bed, and in reverse, how he could leap over top of him with a shout to jolt him out of sleep. 

All the years before, after, and in between. Every single one was precious, and with time, every new experience together supplemented them. It still, if he really reflected on it, bothered him to a certain extent. It bothered him that these new, more amorous exchanges, intimate on a completely different level than ever before even considered, were overlapping the past of the little baby boy he raised into adulthood. Even so, the nagging thought diminished to nothing more than an indistinct hum at the back of his mind. At least, as long as he didn’t draw forth the notion of it being inappropriate or immoral.

Time flew by. In, seemingly, no time, he had finally arrived home. The much needed coffee, already down to half a cup, and his once haywire nerves cut with it. It was bitter cold, but the walk to the corner shop gave him some much needed distance from the three teens ripping the object of his affections attention. 

Stepping into the home and hanging up his coat, he toed off his shoes and stepped into the kitchen. Putting away the bag of coffee, he opened up the plastic bag and set it on the corner of the counter. Pulling out ingredients, his cutting board and chef’s knife, he started to chop the vegetables for a stew. Tossing any scraps or pieces he couldn't use into the plastic bag. 

He thought better of offering the other nuisance’s dinner, but decided, reluctantly, that if Eren really wanted them to stay for dinner, he might as well make extra portions. If nothing else, it would make Eren happy. It wasn’t a question of whether or not he was being too harsh, not wanting Eren to have his friends over or not wanting to share any of Eren’s time with anyone else, it never was. He knew, as he always did, that he was being ludicrous. He knew the idea of keeping Eren holed away in their home together, alone, day in and day out, was simply preposterous, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want it to be that way any less. 

If any, the idea, after each passing day, enticed him that much more. 

He had just turned on the burner and placed the pot of water over top of it when he heard, what he assumed was Eren’s door, opening. He didn’t bother to shift his attention away from his task. Though, while he still remained focused of prepping the meal, he’d be lying if he said he didn’t try to do so gently enough to allow him to hear the two voices now in the hallway. 

A grown man at his age, should know better than to ease drop. In retrospect, a grown man should know better to lay hands on a boy nearly half his age, but who really cared to dwell on the details? 

The two voices, one unmistakably Eren’s, the other he strained to hear. He couldn’t make out what they were saying, not at first. Whatever conversation they were having, they obviously didn’t want to the other two to hear. That in itself caught his attention. 

Turning his back towards the counter, he bowed his head down and turned his ear to the side, trying to pick up the murmured words. He could only hear clips and phrases, but barely. Words expelled at random, none of which seemed all too happy. He could tell whenever Eren spoke. The distinct hiss and slight inclination of his tone, a dead giveaway. 

He had to assume Eren didn’t realize he was home. The fact that he was obviously upset with whomever he was speaking to, and bringing him in the open hallway, was a clear indicator of this. Eren wouldn’t risk letting Levi find out he was unsettled. He knew Levi would take an action, whether he wanted him to or not. Levi, himself, had even told Eren as much. He would not, couldn’t, tolerate anyone upsetting him. 

With the way things were going, Levi didn’t see an end coming to it anytime soon. Whatever the two were bickering about, he was going to put an end to it and kick the sorry twit’s ass out on the curb if need be. 

He silently made his way out of the kitchen, before he completely passed the counter he softly placed the knife he had been, completely unaware, tightly gripping in his hand. Before he rounded the corner to the hall, one word was growled out at a much more audible volume. 

“Stop!” 

Spinning on his heel, Levi turned the corner in time to see Jean, one hand pressed against the wall, and another pulling back the collar of Eren’s button up shirt. His face was pulling back from Eren’s neck, and all else was irrelevant. This kid, this piece of shit, this lump of fucking meat, ‘touched’ Eren. 

“Eren. What happened to your nec--,” Jean began but the hand at the back of his neck cut him short. 

Levi took him by the neck, and grabbed the wrist of the hand at Eren’s collar, and yanked the boy back before shoving him off to the right and directly into the wall, twisting his arm back and up toward his shoulder blades. Eren’s eyes shot wide, and Jean gave a loud cry. 

Levi was seething, seeing red as he pushed Jean harder into the flat surface, “What the fuck do you think you were doing? I have half the mind to snap your arm right off.” 

To stress this, he pushed the arm up further. The angle of his elbow looked near impossible. Perhaps, if Eren hadn’t choose then to push Jean’s arm back down, against Levi’s grip, he may have very well made good on his word. 

“Levi, h-he wasn’t doing anything. It’s a misunderstanding!” 

“Misunderstanding? This prick pins you to a wall, I hear you yell ‘stop’, and he’s got his hand at your throat and you mean to tell me I’m misunderstanding something?”

“What’s going on,” Mikasa’s voice cut in, Armin right behind her. His blue eyes nearly round, mouth hung open as he asked the same question, a bit more meekly. 

“That’s exactly what I want to know,” Levi leaned in to hiss next to Jean’s ear, “You going to enlighten me you piece of shit? Or do I need to shove that hand of yours into a blender to teach you not to touch what isn’t yours.” 

“You’re fucking crazy!” 

“Levi! Please!” 

“Get off of him!” 

“L-Let’s just talk about this calmly! Please don’t fight, I’m sure there’s an explanation.” 

The shouting between the five of them, along with Jean’s yelps and hisses of pain were wearing on him. He shoved Jean sideways to the ground. The boy catching himself before he hit the ground, and Mikasa shoving past Levi, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and glaring up at Levi as if she could shield Jean from him. 

Eren took it upon himself to wrap his arms around Levi’s arms and torso, trying to keep him from marching forward as Jean spat and cursed at him. 

“Levi, stop! He didn’t do anything!” 

“I wanted to know about those fucking marks on his neck you god damned psychopath!”

“What marks,” Mikasa suddenly sharpened her tone, eyes locking onto Eren’s neck to see these marks for herself. 

Just as Jean had said, she found small oblong purple tinted bruises literally his neck and now exposed collar bone. Levi, knowing they were there, didn’t react. It didn’t explain why Jean thought he had any right to lay a hand on Eren, on what was his. 

“Eren. Where did you get those,” Mikasa whispered. 

“He’s a teenage brat, this shit should be normal for someone his age,” Levi countered, not acknowledging that he was the one who made those marks very abnormal.

“Eren doesn’t… Eren’s never dated anyone, he only talked to us at school,” Armin croaked out, eyes darting back and forth as he began drawing conclusions. 

“Eren,” Mikasa spoke his name in warning, eyes narrowing in Levi’s direction, “Where did you get those.” 

Levi’s own stony glare didn’t falter, “All three of you have over stayed your welcome.”

“Eren, tell us wh-…” 

“Mikasa, you guys need to leave. Just leave,” Eren raised his voice over all of them, arms gripping tighter around Levi, “You don’t know everything about me, just mind your own business. I don’t need you to protect me. Just, for now, just leave.”

Even as Eren’s voice grew softer, Mikasa felt a like he had just slapped her across the face. It took her a moment, before she eventually complied. Helping Jean off the floor, and leading him around Levi and out of the hall way, Armin trailing behind as he gave one last glance backward towards the two. 

Levi knew the kid was sharp, but he hadn’t expected him to begin drawing conclusions so quickly. Even if he didn’t get a chance to say it, it was obvious what that blonde was about to suggest, and Mikasa herself easily caught on. Those three were more than just a nuisance at this point, they were becoming a reliability. 

They could very well become a hindrance, reestablishing the rift between Eren and himself. He could ‘feel’ his blood warming in his veins. He could see everything Eren and he had being taken away. Everything he fought for, who he fought for, Eren. 

They could take away Eren. 

A call to the police could be troublesome, but they didn’t have any proof. Some hickey’s on a teenager’s neck is hardly proof that he had anything to do with it, and Eren was of consenting age. He peeled Eren’s arms off of him, not wanting to hear what he had to say. He was too lost in thought of what could or may go wrong. 

He turned his head toward the entrance way as he passed by on his way back to the kitchen. He caught a glimpse of the three teens shuffling out the door, Mikasa, taking her time to lock eyes with Levi’s and hold his stare for a steady moment before disappearing behind the closing door. 

It wasn’t worth the risk. If they could do anything to harm the relationship between Eren and himself, they had to go. Eren would have to stop seeing them, not all at once. That would be suspicious. Eren would have to have a fight with them or come up with some reason as to why he didn’t want to see them anymore. 

Chaotic thoughts charged through his mind as he returned to cooking. The back of the knife clicking loudly against the wooden cutting board beneath it. As he chopped away, he thought back to right before the exchange. He wasn’t sure whether or not he was glad, at this point, that he had placed the knife down on the counter beforehand. 

“Levi…Levi.”

He tried to ignore him. He was in far too deep in disarray to handle a conversation about what just occurred. He was furious, more so than the night he waited for Eren to come home. More so than he could every remember being, even in comparison toward what he felt with his father all those years ago. 

How dare he? How dare they? How dare he touch Eren? How dare they try to get between them? How dare any of them? 

“Levi?” 

The gentle hand dropping to the side of his hip set him off. Dropping the knife with a clank, he spun around grabbing Eren’s forearm and hip, pinning him against the edge of the counter. He saw Eren flinch as the sharp corner dug as the base of his spine, but it didn’t stop him from forcing his hips down into his, dropping his lips against the marring bruises adorning Eren’s neck. 

With a harsh bite and strong suck, he brightened the bruise anew. Pinning Eren’s arm against the counter, he ground his hips down again. Their hip bones grinding against each other painfully, eliciting a gasp and hiss from them both respectively. 

“You let him touch you,” Levi bit down on the next fading bruise, bringing it back to its former glory. Eren himself whimpered, trying to push him away. 

“I-It hurts!”

“I’m the only one Eren,” Levi growled out as he silenced Eren with a searing kiss. His hand pushing past the bottom of his shirt to roam over his stomach. When the fabric barred him from moving any further, Levi didn’t hesitate to rip at the fabric, the sound of popping threads and buttons scattering across the floor sounded in the otherwise quiet room. 

Eren felt panic beginning to build. Every kiss sent Levi’s tongue and teeth to claim his lips and mouth without mercy. The hand at his arm so tight he could swear he felt it bruising. He remained limp against the growing bulge and sharp hips grating into his. The counter at his back felt like it was damn near about to cut into his flesh or slice right through it. This was wrong. This was all wrong. 

This wasn’t like Levi at all. Levi was gentle. He cherished him. When he touched him it was delicate, loving. This… This wasn’t like any of the times before. His weak attempt at struggling ceased, and all he could do was grip at Levi’s shoulders. His breath was speeding up, his heart was hammering in his chest, and for the first time in his life, he felt scared of Levi. 

Levi could feel Eren shivering beneath him. He knew it wasn’t the usual shiver he felt when he excited Eren. This was different. At any other time he maybe have stopped and fretted over the brat, comfort him and calm him down. Tell him everything he needed to hear, every word of consolation he would need to give in order to tell him, it’s ok. 

The sting, however, was too fresh in his mind. The image of Jean pinning Eren against the wall, burned into his skull. He needed to claim what was his. He needed to know, need to confirm, fuck he just needed Eren. In all the right ways, in all the wrong ways. He needed him. 

His teeth nipped to Eren’s earlobe, not holding back on a particular bite that made Eren jolt against him. With nowhere to go, Levi pressed his cheek to the side of Eren’s face, lips brushing over the center of his ear. 

“Tell me your mine Eren. You love me most don’t you? I’m the only one that can touch you like this.”  
Eren’s bleat moan sounded in his ears, as he pulled his hips back and he reached down to roll his palm over the front of Eren’s Jeans. 

“I want to hear you say it. Eren.” 

“Y-You’re… Levi. Please, I don’t… you’re scaring me.” 

Levi’s face scrunched as if in pain at his words. His forehead dropping into Eren’s shoulder as he squeezed the teen’s groin, “Eren, Eren…. I need you to say it.”

Eren’s head tilted back as he stared up at the ceiling, his throat bobbing as he swallowed thickly. 

“Only you. O-Only you, Levi. I love you.” 

Levi stepped back, and in what Eren could only describe as a blur of motion, threw his arm across the counter to rid it of any offending items, and lifted Eren onto it. Eren’s ass hit the cold granite as the clattering of items hit the floor resonated within the space. 

Eren’s hands moved back to brace himself, as Levi made quick work of his jeans, not bothering to pull them down at all. Instead, pulling his flaccid cock out from the slit of his boxers. 

“Levi. P-Please. I don’t wan..”

“Eren,” Levi silenced him as his lips traced nips and bites down his chest and torso, ending up at his clothed thigh and pinching the flesh and denim between his teeth. 

“Eren, let me touch you.” 

Eren could hear the desperation in his voice, crazed as it was, as this entire situation had turned out to be. Levi whispered words of encouragement over his soft member. The way his lips brushed and breath heated the flesh, slowly forcing arousal, despite the throbbing of fresh hickies littering his body. He didn’t want this, not like this. He had never seen Levi act like this, not with him. He was afraid, but more so than for himself, he was afraid for Levi, not just of him. 

At the small nod from Eren, Levi didn’t take any pause in swallowing him down to the base of his shaft with a hard suck. He couldn’t help but swing his head back at the sensation, being completely enveloped by the wet orifice. The thunk of his head hitting the cabinet didn’t deter Levi in the slightest. He was far too engrossed in the hardening flesh between his lips. 

Eren moaned as he glanced down at Levi, head bobbing and teeth scraping against the sensitive flesh, in a way that had him confused as to whether or not he could even enjoy this. But if this was what Levi wanted, if this was what he needed, than he would be willing to set aside his pride if it were to give him peace of mind. 

~ 

At the end of the night, Levi pulled Eren into his arms. He didn’t outwardly cry, he didn’t see tears streaking down the man’s face or hear any inkling of sobs. He did, however, feel his arms tighten around his waist. Each muscle tense, each breath controlled. In and out. A shake of his chest every so often between a breath. 

As Levi settled down, earlier that evening, the weight of his actions crashed down on him. He knew he went too far. In his need to gain reassurance, to reestablish some sort ridiculous notion of dominance, he pushed Eren. He didn’t stop when Eren shivered. He didn’t stop when Eren agreed, though he knew he was only doing so for his sake and not Eren’s own. He knew, and he didn’t ‘stop’. 

While he hadn’t forced Eren beyond drinking him, he still felt as filthy as he had when he was a boy. When his own father ignored his cries in favor of his own selfish needs. Was he doomed to be his father? Was this possessiveness using love as an excuse? 

No, he refused to believe it. He wouldn’t be that man. He wouldn’t hurt Eren. He wouldn’t force him. He wouldn’t, not ever again. 

Levi buried his head against Eren’s back. Eren’s hand stroking the arm around his waist as he whispered that it was ‘ok.’ He was ok. Levi was ok. They were ok. They would be ok. Everything’s alright. 

I love you. 

I love you. 

I love you too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \-- So I'm going to start posting updates on my tumblr * Let you guys know when to expect these or what I'm working on at the moment --- I'm pretty good about blogging nonsense about these chapters and what's happening with them 
> 
> everything will be tagged : fic: "title" so yeah if you want to keep tabs on this one fic:mine redundant sure but w/e 
> 
> for any who are interested -- <3 Till next time!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ~ I ended up with a Music Playlist for this fic: ~ It's a combination of songs I've originally listened to while writing and some pretty fabulous suggestions by some of my lovely followers~ <3 Feel free to suggest anymore that come to mind~ 
> 
> Heres the link address: http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLD0K6n5d3VeKYy5tPsN310B-mhZZXnk_z 
> 
> Thank you and Enjoy!! <3

A deep creased remained in the center of his drawn brows. Lips barely parted with both corners pulled slightly back from discontent. A delicate touch of fingertips hovering over bruised skin of Eren’s forearm. Eyes slowly assessed each discoloration. The, near bands, of purple circled around, and he knew, he regretted, that he was the cause. 

Unlike the other patches of marred skin, the tender flesh tinted by passionate and fueled by lust, this area held a far different significance. It wasn’t from desire, unlike the others. It wasn’t summoned forth by caressing lips. It wasn’t in a moment of bliss, air heavy with lust. It was raw, violent. The mix of purple, lime and yellow, not one of affection, but one of anger. A vicious remainder that he had, indeed, truly, physically hurt Eren. 

Shifting his weight to the arm beneath him, he leaned down to kiss the tender flesh. He kept his head down, even after his lips left the skin. His eyes remaining closed, keeping his breath as close to silence as possible, listening to Eren’s own steady rhythm of inhales and exhales. 

His lips, his chin, his nose even, all remained but a hairs width away. The warmth seeping from Eren’s arm to him. Warm and peaceful, blissful rest following a chaotic night. He was torn between how tender his heart felt, realizing just how his aggressive behavior had been and how good it truly elated it felt, to have Eren yield to him, just to please him. 

Eren, whom was not the type to be timid or hesitant. Eren, who could never be described as, submissive in the slightest. Who wouldn’t falter, who remained determined and headstrong through every challenge or obstacle. Stubborn and unrelenting in pursuit of what he wanted. 

Eren, whom for him, could be bashful or weak kneed. Eren, who for him, could be obedient, even docile. Who pushed him to his limits, challenged him and pressed forward. Persistent and uncompromising, when it came to him and their relationship. For himself, and no one else. 

It was proof that Eren was willing to do anything to please him. Even if that meant, going as far as, swallowing his pride. Perhaps, even, his very own self-regard. The thought of what extent Eren would or could go for him and he alone, sent chills up his spine. The feeling causing him to, involuntarily, pull back on his shoulders and roll his spine as it ran through him.   
A soft sigh passed between Eren’s even breaths. Levi’s attention drawn to the two appendages, nude with the slightest tint of pale pink. Moist as they fluttered minutely with each pass of air. Soft murmuring, to quiet to hear as he slept on. 

The kid had always been a deep sleeper, unlike Levi, himself. At least when it came to noise, Eren would barely stir, however, to the touch, he was quite sensitive. 

Levi propped his head onto his hand and extended his other out to brush the tips of his fingers across the soft tissue. He chuckled as Eren’s nose twitched, eyebrows scrunching as if to sneeze before relaxing again with a small huff. 

Pleased with the reaction, he did so once more, this time, trailing his fingers up his cheek towards his ear then lightly back over to his nose. Eren’s arm shot up, as his face pursed and twitched, rubbing at the offending area before rolling on his side, facing Levi. His mouth clapped together noisily, nose scrunching once more with a sniff. 

With the shadow of a smile, Levi lightly kissed the tip of his nose, “You’re too cute brat.”

The brunette shifted once more, hand finding its way to Levi’s chest. Fingers curled against his skin as Eren licked his lips in his sleep. With a pull of his lip, he grinned. He couldn’t help but want to tease him. The vulnerability Eren displayed was too good a chance to pass up, and any resemblance of normality between them was dutifully needed in light of the previous night. Levi bowed his head down to kiss at the hairline of Eren’s forehead.

“Eren.”

He called gently.

“Eren.” 

At the lack of response, his smirk widened. Reaching out he pinched Eren’s nose between the joints of his pointer and middle fingers.

“Oi, brat.”

With a shark intake of breath, and a snort that could rival Babe, the pig, Eren’s eyes shot open, his hand snatching Levi’s. The haze of sleep, left him in an unaware panic. A series of ‘wha-‘, ‘whats’, and curses leaving his lips as Levi releases his nose with a soft laugh. 

“Relax,” Levi goaded as he reached to release Eren’s tense grip from his wrist. Without realizing it, he accidently curled his fingers against the tender area of the brunette’s arm. With a small hiss, jolt and even a flinch to accompany the two, Levi’s expression fell immediately. The atmosphere completely shattered; his heart, seemingly, stuttering in his chest. 

Levi released his grip quickly. Drawing his hand back to his body. The way Eren’s eyes sparked when he grabbed his wrist… Fright, clear as day. He was afraid. 

“Eren…” 

The brunette took in a breath, head clearing as he began to wake and become more aware. Subconsciously, Eren had grabbed the injured arm and gently rubbed at it; in a way to sooth it. Awkwardly, his eyes briefed off to the side, before they fidgeted between Levi and his pillow. 

The older male opened his mouth to apologize, but the words fell short. He couldn’t truly apologize. Not because he didn’t feel bad for hurting Eren. He did, he never wished to bring harm to Eren, but he didn’t completely regret his actions; only that they got out of hand. If he were to be honest with himself, it excited him beyond words to have Eren repeat back to him everything he wished to hear. To apologize would be a lie, and he never wanted to lie to Eren. 

“I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Eren shut his eyes as Levi reached out to brush back his bangs. A fruitless task, as the strands fell back over his forehead. 

“I-I know…” 

Levi’s lips flattened in a moment of contemplation. Of course Eren would still be upset. Even after all the reassurances he received from Eren last night, he couldn’t expect things to be OK right away. He couldn’t expect it, but that didn’t mean he didn’t crave it. 

Drawing his hand back, Levi shifted out of bed and moved toward the door. 

“I’ll make breakfast.” 

With a mere nod, Eren mutely acknowledged him. Levi paused, hand on the frame of the doorway, as he watched Eren, who was now, sitting up in the bed with his head hung low and shoulders slumped, still caressing his own forearm. The light that peered through their bedroom window cast the boy’s back in shadow. Limited curves and features illuminated, his shoulder, the curve of his neck, the arch of his cheek bone and the highlight of his bed tousled hair. 

Despite how beautiful he appeared in this light and shadow, the posture overrode the appeal, seeming to make his gesture come across as tragic. He was distraught, uneasy, and crestfallen, and Levi knew, he was the cause. With a bitter turn of his stomach, he forced himself into the kitchen to make something to eat, in spite of his, now lacking, appetite.   
~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~   
By the time he began plating breakfast, Eren had, already, quietly, settled at the table. Both plates in hand, he placed one down in front of Eren and took the seat across from his. Eren thanked him in a near whisper as he picked up his fork. It didn’t go unnoticed to Levi that green eyes scanned over the small areas marring his skin before snapping their attention back on his food. 

Levi licked his lips, averting his gaze. Another twinge of guilt twisting his stomach. Rather than dwell on the feeling, he dug the side of his fork into the corner of his homemade waffle, plucking it up with the utensil and popping it in his mouth. 

It was sweet, something less akin to his tastes but it was what Eren liked most. A light sprinkle of confectionary sugar, a dollop of whipped topping and sliced strawberries. Without trying to draw attention, Levi drifted his vision to Eren. The brunette was lazily chewing a piece of his waffle, fork pushing around the slices of strawberry back and forth. 

It was obvious they both were disinterested with the food before them. Their stomachs complicated by their rampant thoughts. When the silence between them grew too heavy and the apparent fact that neither would get more than a few bites down, respectively, Levi set his fork down. 

The simple movement caused the brunette to sit up straighter in his chair, mimicking the action. He turned his lowered gaze to Levi, eyes refusing to keep still as they tried to find a point to comfortably focus on. Levi bit back the frown as he noticed the twitching line of vision. He was avoiding his eyes. 

“You don’t have to force yourself to eat.” 

Eren only nodded.

“I can make it again when you’re feeling better.” 

Eren nodded once more, “Ok.”

The voice was so meek, eyes still refusing to meet his. He knew this morning would go any way but smoothly, but he hadn’t anticipated Eren downright evading him. 

“Eren, talk to me. I can’t read your mind.” 

At this, he watched the boy frown before finally meeting his eyes as he begins.  
“I’m sorry… but last night…” 

Eren’s words faded off, ending with a bob of throat as he swallowed and broke their eye contact. Levi waited to speak. Silent, hoping Eren would elaborate. Torn between wanting to know and not wanting to face the repercussions of his outburst. 

“Last night…,” Levi offered in way to prompt him further. 

“Last night,” he continued, voice a bit shaken, “… I didn’t… I’ve never…” 

A gruff whine of annoyance slipped past the teen’s lips, unable to find the words he needed. 

“I scared you,” Levi muttered, running a hand through his hair, dragging the palm to the back of his neck where he squeezed from his own aggravation of admitting the fact. 

Eren paused for a moment, his lips parting as he spoke through a slow exhale, “It wasn’t like you….” 

Eren was right. It wasn’t. It wasn’t at all what he was like but the frightening fact remained, what he was, who he was, was beginning to morph and blur. He was as unpredictable to Eren as he was to himself. How could he reassure someone, as precious as Eren, when he could not convince himself? 

Levi pushed back his chair and stood. Moving to Eren’s side, he pulls his chair out. The legs of the chair peel against the tiled floor, groaning in the short distance it traveled. He watched the brunette’s reaction, momentary shock settling over his features before he looked to him in question. 

The raven only offered as soft a smile as he could muster, crouching down to sit on his heels. He pulled Eren’s hands from his lap and held them in their own. Gently, he pulled the right toward him, pressing a soft kiss against the palm. 

“You’re right… I wasn’t thinking. I don’t know what came over me.” 

Squeezing Eren’s hands in his own, he called his name to gather his full attention.

“I never meant to force you into anything you’re not comfortable with.”

Under his breath, Levi hadn’t even realized he added, “I won’t be like ‘him’.” 

So mutely, Eren wasn’t sure he heard it until he asked. The tension pulling at Levi’s shoulders was a tell. The teen’s brows worried as his mind tried to search for a theory. Just who was Levi referring to? 

“Him?”

The raven waved him off. Thoughts itching at the back of his mind reminded him of how he scared he first felt when his father forced himself on him. His chest felt constricted as the memory invaded him. For both Eren and his reassurance, he placed Eren’s open palm against his cheek and leaned against it, taking a deep breath. 

“We can stop. I’ll stop. I won’t press you, Eren.” 

The words were hushed but firm and the thought that followed begged Eren within in his mind. 

‘I just need you to stay with me. Stay, because I can’t be responsible for myself if you ever leave.’ 

“Leevi…” 

The pet name rolled off Eren’s tongue and released any tension he had left in his shoulders. It was always unnerving whenever Eren abandoned the endearing pronunciation. It was always an easy indicator that something was wrong, and though Levi knew and expected exactly what had been wrong and what probably still was wrong, it still pained him. Eren’s fingers lightly scratched at the short undercut at the side of Levi’s scalp with a small smile. The subtle expression melted Levi against the touch, his hand atop Eren’s, lacing themselves around his fingers. 

“I don’t want that. You’ve always done everything for me. You’ve always looked out for me, and I’ve always… will always… look up to you. You’re normally so gentle… So, I was just… shocked. I was scared, but I don’t want to stop.” 

As if to drive his point home, Eren placed his other palm against Levi’s opposite cheek and leaned in closer. Barely an inch separated their faces from each other. 

“It’s the same for me, I need you. I am yours as much as I want you to be mine. Leevi, I want you, more of you, all of you. I love you. I really love you. I just… I don’t want it like that… It felt wrong. It’s the only time I ever felt that way, and I know you didn’t mean it… I know… Leevi, I…”

“Eren.” 

The commanding voice shut him up mid-sentence, but the authoritative tone did little to mask the rare genuine smile Levi only showed to him. 

“Show me.” 

“Huh?” 

Levi chuckled at his expression, somewhere between a mix of flustered and dumbstruck. It only encouraged him to tease further. Clasping both hands in his, he drew Eren to his feet to stand, nearly flush, against him. 

“I said… Show me, Eren.” 

Leaning on his toes for a bit more height, Levi whispered over the center of his ear. The tone of his voice dropped lower, damp and husky, as his words blew over Eren’s ear, “Show me how you want me.”

It was like a dam broke and given way, propelled forward, an unstoppable force. Any tepidness Eren had shattered along with his restraints. The brunette’s hands curled over Levi’s hips, one midway between his left cheek and lower back and the other grabbing the thigh just below his ass on the right. As soon as his hands met their destination they lifted and pushed Levi’s hips forward into his own. Green eyes masked behind lids, as he ground his hips in the same motion. 

A rushed sound left Levi’s lips, the hand gripping the top of his thigh, directly under his ass, just slightly ticklish and so sensitive in contrast to the one pushing at his back. Each grind of their hips met with a soft expulsion of air as their breaths quickened; excitement building. The fabric between them did little to hide their growing lust. Each and every move, that Eren initiated, sent Levi’s body into overdrive; reactive to each brief or lingering touch. 

Levi was, honestly, a little surprised at how demanding he was. Lips were finding every patch of skin to caress between his cheek and shoulder, and every so often, Eren would draw his lips over his teeth to mouth over an area of skin he wanted to nip. The odd sensation of soft flesh pushed against his own by Eren’s teeth, left just enough pressure to make him shiver without hurting the skin. It was teasing, in a way, which actually left him wanting to feel the sharp edges of his canines threatening to break into his skin. 

For as rambunctious and forward as he was, Eren was fairly reserved and shy when it came to the physical aspect of their relationship. For the most part, Levi would be the one to take charge, spoiling Eren with his touch, tongue, and mouth. And while Eren did want to pleasure him as well, he always hesitated; he was nervous, unsure of himself, he assumed. 

If Levi had to guess, knowing Eren as well as he did, his pride was what made him so reluctant to lead. The brat was probably paranoid of screwing up; doing something wrong or ruining what seemed so delicately developing between them. 

Though, with the way Eren was currently charging lustfully forward, you would never suspect him to hold back in the slightest. Every motion, every touch, every kiss, every whisper of a moan, was a complete contradiction to how bashful he had been. 

Ironic, that he was introverted at all, when some time prior to this romance, Eren had been jerking off with his name on his lips as he came, lying right beside him. He was bold then, it only served to confuse the image of a reticent boy, an image which he was very much shattering at the moment. 

“Is this all you want Eren,” Levi’s words stroked his ear, “to dry fuck me in the kitchen?”

Levi succeeded in tinting Eren’s ears red; watching as the flushed hue enveloped from his cheeks to the tip of his ears. A sign of his embarrassment and inexperience. Dirty talk, as he saw it, had a profound effect on fucking up any logic left of his sex driven, liquefied brain. This time, it only seemed to provide that much more incentive. 

Eager steps pushed him backwards with a throaty, “Bedroom.”

“Ho,” Levi turned the sound into a question, quite pleased with the dynamic shift in Eren’s role.

He wasn’t fumbling, as noticeably anyway, and he wasn’t stuttering or adverting his eyes. He was direct, headstrong and obstinate as he truly was at heart. This Eren, the one who stood unshakeable in his resolve, he loved the most. 

Each step he took backwards, was another advance of Eren’s avidity. His hands drifted under his shirt, the hand under his ass gripping tighter and massaging as far down as he could reach. The process of stumbling backwards, proved to wear Eren’s patience. With a grunt of annoyance, he easily, much to further Levi’s surprise, dropped his other hand to the same position on his opposite leg and hoisted him up, wrapping his legs around his waist. 

The added height of the sitting position, allowed Eren to reach his chest. The raven’s head flew back, neck arching as his back bowed, with a shocked moan. The provocation of Eren’s lips, teeth and tongue setting on his clothed chest and collar bone roused him all the more. 

He wanted more, even more. He wanted Eren bare against him. He wanted to feel these confident flurry of affection, as physically raw as the emotions shrouding them. He wanted to goad him further. He wanted to explore just how thirsty he was; how far he would go. 

Opportunity presented itself the moment he found Eren shifting them onto the bed. Left knee pressed against the mattress and the other remained on the floor for balance, careful to lower Levi and himself down to the bedding comfortably, without jostling him. 

When Eren pulled back, after a particularly sensual kiss, the shorter of the two stared in wonder at the hazy eyes above him. The cloud of lust in his eyes drew a smirk across his features. The teen, puzzled by the expression, tilted his head slightly in question. A small smile of his own appearing. The likes of which you gain when you don’t quite catch the joke, but want in on the fun. 

Oh, Levi would lead him into the fun alright. Right by the collar. 

“Eren, I need you to articulate for me... Tell me, exactly…,” he hung on that last word, accentuating it before he continued, “What it is you want to do with me.” 

Eren’s smile nearly evaporated, twitching back in place incredulously, “How can you even use a word like that right now?”

“Apparently, unlike you, I can use both my brain and my dick at the same time,” Levi teased, and the wise crack didn’t go without consequence. Not that he would complain.

“Funny,” Eren breathed out with fake offense. 

A hand made its way under his shirt, pressing him further back, it rove over every trace of taunt muscle and reached his nipple with a light pinch. He couldn’t fight back the image of being pinned down all those years ago, but in comparison to that time, he now felt calm, ready… happy. This wasn’t forced, it was what he wanted, what Eren and he wanted. And while the haunting image stained the back of his mind, it didn’t affect him enough to deter him from allowing the brunette to do whatever he so wished. Rolling over the bud with his thumb, the teen leaned forward a bit, locking their eyes as he spoke. 

“I want to do more this time.” 

While his actions were resolute, the slight waver revealed what little trepidation he still had driving into this. Eren was still very much young, especially when it came to any and all things surrounding sex. Short of whatever convoluted ideas he gained through internet porn, or chatterbox hormonal peers, he didn’t really ‘know’ what to do; how to do it. 

Forcing Eren to move slightly up with him, he sat up on his elbows and quirked a brow. The knowing smirk, not once, leaving his lips. 

“You’ll have to be a little more specific, Eren.” 

He could tell, from the quiver of Eren’s pupils that he was fighting the urge to look away. The raven felt he needed to enjoy this while he could, while Eren still was innocent and fresh to these sexual advances, while Eren would still get self-conscious, and before he shifted to be more flirtatious and coy. He wanted to remember every stretch of skin dyed in scarlet, every shaking word and forced syllable, every shy touch and reticent mannerism. 

It was hard to decide whether he would miss the Eren of now, once they proceeded to ‘broaden their horizons’. He was rather looking forward to this promise of this more commanding man leaning in on him from above. The way he chewed his lip, perhaps in delay to think of a response, reminded Levi, again, that he would eventually have to guide Eren through this. To that, he could feel himself pulse against the confines of his pants. A twitch, that did not go unnoticed but the one who felt it against his own, above him. 

“I’m growing impatient brat.” 

“I…,” Eren’s voice nearly croaked and he fought his throat for clarity, “I want to have sex.”

Levi’s brow arched, impossibly further, “You aren’t wasting anytime are you?” 

The question was one asked in amusement, but this time Eren couldn’t help but briefly advert his eyes. 

“I-I want… Leevi, I want to have sex with you… I want us both to feel it. I-I want.. I want us to…” 

Eren trailed off as he chanced a glance to the raven haired male, whom watched him under, now, scrutinizing eyes. 

“Are you sure that’s what you want?” 

There was no stalling the firm nod and tight pressed lips, schooled into a look of determination. Levi would have chuckled at any other time, but instead, settled for reaching up to brush his thumb over the boy’s cheek. Only his Eren could make such an uncompromising look appear ‘cute’. 

“How could I ever dream of refusing you,” Levi’s words were hushed as he sat up more, “I need you to take off your clothes for me Eren.”

The brunette complied easily, save for the slight tremor in his hands. As Levi peeled away his own clothes, he prayed the tremor was more in part for the anxiety of what they were about to do and not lingering doubt. 

Levi pulled himself back onto the bed, standing on his knees as he pulled Eren toward him to follow suit. The raven allowed his left hand to settle on Eren’s hip, drawing him closer but not quite allowing their bodies to touch. The distance was maddening, just a hair’s breath away, skin radiating the warmth that grew between each other, tempting them to press up against the comforting heat of their bodies.

Rather than succumbing, Levi met his right with Eren’s own. Pushing the hand against his and moving it up between them, visible out of the corner of their eyes. He wanted Eren to feel safe, secure, unpressured, and he needed to feel the same for himself; as reluctant as he were, to admit it to himself.   
Eren’s eyes followed Levi’s own to their joined hands. Such a simple and innocent gesture, seemed so much more complex and intimate. It wasn’t till Levi spoke, did Eren’s eyes looked back to his as they lingered a bit longer. 

“If at any point this gets to be too much….,” grey shifted onto green, “I want you to say so, no matter what. I want you to tell me to stop, and I’ll stop, regardless of the circumstance. Do you understand?” 

Eren nodded, a bit confused by the sudden severity of Levi’s words. Though, he supposed it had to do with last night’s events. Little did he know, the request had more to do with the dark past shrouding Levi’s childhood. 

“Eren, I need you to promise me,” the hand at his hip slid up his body to hold the back of his head. The motion ensuring Eren was looking directly at him, leaving no room for him to lie. Levi would be able to see right through him if he were. 

“This is my condition, think of it that way.” 

“Alright,” Eren’s hand gently squeezed the elbow of the hand resting behind his scalp, “I promise. If I feel uncomfortable at all, I’ll let you know,” after a pause and a glowing smile, “Thank you, Leevi.” 

While Eren didn’t completely understand the reasons behind Levi’s stipulation, he could fully appreciate his request at face value. As always, for him and only him, Levi was gentle and assuring. This was the Levi that loved him to no end, and cherished him likewise. This was the Levi he wanted the most; the one who held eyes and impassioned sentiments only for him and no one else. 

Bringing their fingers to his lips, Levi trailed his tongue from the base to the tip of Eren’s index; the appendage brushing between his own as he did so. 

“I want you to watch, carefully,” the way that last word rolled off his tongue could be considered a sin, “And do… Everything… I do. Ok, Eren.” 

Eren’s voice shook, as a shiver of anticipation crept up his spine, “Y-Yes, Leevi.”

“Good boy,” Levi smirked, keeping interlocking their arms he drew his hand away from Eren’s and brought his index and middle fingers to his mouth. 

Sucking them in, Levi left his lips parted for Eren to see. His tongue swirled around the digits, lapping at them as he drew his head back then pushed his mouth over them again. Eren watched, mouth agape, as he felt arousal stirring below more than ever. The lewd image of the one he loved the most, dragging his bottom teeth and lip along his fingers, tongue dancing between, around, and over, stunned him. It took another amused grin, and half lidded eyes staring up into his to get him to move. 

He mimicked Levi, as best he could, with his own fingers. He thought it odd at first, why he had to do this to himself, but with the sight before of Levi doing such a provocative act to himself, made it clear as polished crystal. Eren could feel himself turning red, noticing the trail of saliva building around both their fingers. Mortified, at the idea, of possibly being sloppy enough to drool and embarrass himself. 

Extracting his wet fingers from his mouth, Levi’s voice seemed to have lowered hotly, “Very good, Eren. This will feel strange at first, just focus on doing the same for me, Ok?” 

A hand, at his waist, drew their bodies closer. Levi pressed their chests together, now completely erect on their knees and bodies pushing together to hold them in place. The two sucked in a breath and gasped, respectively, as their hot arousals finally came in contact. They pushed against each other and eventually arched up, enclosed between them, below their belly buttons. Unlocking their arms in favor of reaching behind him, Levi traced his wet fingers over Eren’s entrance, shuddering, as seconds later, Eren did the same. 

The tremble didn’t go unnoticed by Eren, who couldn’t speak; rather, he couldn’t formulate words as the two fingers massaged slowly around and peeking through, only slightly, into the tight ring. The shorter male nipped at Eren’s neck, all the way to his lips, to keep a distraction. He wanted to make Eren feel as comfortable as possible. He knew all too well how awkward and strange an invasion in this tense area could feel, and shamefully, he also knew how good it could potentially feel as well. 

Though for now, he just wanted Eren to get a feel for it. He wasn’t ready to that away from Eren just yet. More so, he was ill prepared for it, and more than ever, he wanted to take this opportunity to join with Eren and erase the feeling of that man, once and for all. 

“Is this alright, Eren?” 

Words fanned across his lips and the brunette could only mumble his agreement and force out the rest, “S’fine… It kinda feels good, strange, but s’good.”

“Kiss me.” 

The demand was immediately answered. Eren’s tongue tracing his lips before breaking past them and brushing his tongue. The raven, positive his fingers were coated enough, and silently hoping Eren’s were as well; knowing the brat’s usual half assed attention to detail, he wasn’t chancing Eren coating his fingers and not getting them wet enough for the intrusion. 

He pressed firmer, past the tight ring, twisting his wrist as he did so to comfortably slide in and coat him evenly. He pulled back and plunged in again. It wasn’t till the third time he curled in the digit that he felt Eren’s finger push into him.

He failed to starve off the initial reaction. His body tensing, though he knew better. Levi turned his head from Eren’s, dropping his forehead against the boy’s shoulder. His shoulders drawn up and bowed as he shuddered. He wanted to curse, but a low whine threatened to make its way, if he dared to try. Levi, too absorbed in trying to calm himself down, didn’t realize Eren had frozen in place, as he had. Lids pressed tightly together over his eyes, Levi swallowed thickly to clear his throat to speak. 

“Leevi… Are you alright?” 

Wasn’t he supposed to be the one concerned over the brat and not the other way around? Levi let out a breath, putting some ease into his shoulders. 

“Keep moving, I’m fine.” 

He was amazed at how sure his voice sounded, and wasted no time in moving his fingers once again, the slow rhythm helping to bypass any more distress. Eren probably doubted him a bit still, because it took a bit longer for him to begin moving again. When he did, he remained attentive to the reaction of his every muscle, watching carefully as he caressed his back reassuringly. While the gesture soothed him, Levi still felt silly at reacting that way at all. 

Once they both relaxed, and Levi focused solely on that fact that what he was doing, he was doing with Eren, and proceeded to edge in another finger. At the second, Eren bucked forward, the hot lengths between them, scorching against their skin, needing friction. 

Unabashed, Levi and Eren moved their hips, forcing pressure between them with a hiss on their lips. Their hands busy with working behind and the other holding hips to keep them steady, their mouth’s caresses and fervent grinding, made up for any ground lost between them. 

Steeling himself, Levi pulled out his, once scissoring, fingers. That should be enough, he told himself, giving a squeeze to the firm cheek of Eren’s bare ass. A soft moan left his lips as Eren pulled his fingers out as well, keeping true, he also took a portion of Levi’s rump in his hand with a squeeze. The soft chuckle that followed split a smile on Eren’s own features, happy to hear the melodious sound passing through kiss swollen lips. 

“Lay back smart ass.” 

Eren’s lopsided grin carried with him as he swung his legs forward on either side of Levi, and leaned back on his elbows. A bit sheepishly, Eren blushed, eyes focusing on the impressive length arching between Levi’s legs. 

It wasn’t that he hadn’t noticed or looked at it closely before, he certainly and undeniably had, but now it seemed so much more intimidating. It didn’t take much, to put two and two together, and figure out just why they stretched each other. Though looking at him now, thicker than himself and a length just barely falling short of his own, he looked massive; like no amount of preparation could suffice enough to accommodate it. 

“Relax….” 

Eren hadn’t realized the growing look of panic forming on his own face, the reality of the situation getting the best of him, but Levi assumed this is what would happen. This teen, this kid… had no experience when it came to sex. He was like a fish out of water as he drew conclusions from straight observation alone. Not that Levi’s experience helped much but it at least gave him the mechanics and what not to do, but he didn’t want to think any further than that. 

What he did want to think about, is what kinds of faces Eren would be making in a few short minutes? 

Bending at the waist, he wrapped his lips around Eren’s erection and swallowed him without so much of a hint of warning. Eren’s hips bucked into his mouth as he cried out but the unsuspected warm. His hand shooting out to thread and grip through raven locks as the other gripped at crumpling sheet. A cry of his name, spurred Levi on, as he wet every inch of the throbbing organ, making sure to coat it properly with help from his tongue. 

With a groan, Levi pulled back with a pop. 

“L-Leevi, you don’t have too, ah!” 

A firm grip at the base of his cock cut off his words, “I wasn’t,” Levi corrected. Waiting for Eren to peer through heavy lidded eyes. 

“I needed to get you ready for me.”

“Wha- are yo…. Fu----ck!” 

By the time Eren managed to open his mouth, Levi had already settled his legs on either side of Eren’s hips, and right before he could finish said sentence, pushed Eren’s length completely inside him. 

The raven’s head and back arched, feeling like he could fall backward at any moment by the overwhelming sensation gripping his body and spreading him. Eren, whom he loved. Eren, whom he raised, Eren, Eren. Eren, who loved him and Eren who helped him grow in so many more ways than just age. 

Eren who took away all his grief, his loneliness, his heartache and pain, and could easy bring it all back, simply, with the flick of a wrist. Eren who had cleansed him in so many ways, erased so many foul memories, and who, now, was clearing the one haunting trace of his past. 

Eren sat up half way to hold onto Levi’s lower back, stabilizing him as the shorter male straightened his legs, as much as he could. In the arched position, the crown of his head, slowly lowering to the mattress, he rolled his hips down, listening intently to each ragged breath that left Eren. He wanted to feel every shudder, hear every moan, and match it with vigor. 

Eren’s hands traced around his abdomen, eventually settling on the top of his hips and help grind him down against him. With both pairs of their legs extended, it made it a bit more difficult to move, but the strain proved more than worthwhile. Digging his heels into the mattress behind Eren and his shoulder blades and head supporting his weight as well, he maneuvered his hips up and down the length filling him; making sure to twist and grind his hips forward, back, and at times circling as he rested completely down to grind into him. 

Eren met against each glide of his hips with his own thrusts. The two a mess of panting, moaning, and exertion. It wasn’t long before finger tips bit painfully into his skin and he knew Eren was close. Eren would fill him. Eren would spill his seed inside his body and reclaim the space for his own. With this he would be truly his, in every sense of the word. 

Confirming his nearly climax, Eren nearly shouted, his voice carrying in their bedroom. Echoing, alongside, the slap of their skin. When he heard his name called out in warning, Levi forced himself to sit up on Eren’s hips to use his full weight to bounce his body. Wrapping an arm around Eren’s neck and kissing him hard, Levi directed the hand on his hip to his weeping length. 

“Let me cum with you,” Levi moaned over his lips. 

As sloppy as it was, just touching him and having Eren inside him, was enough to draw him close to orgasm. With his jaw hung low, eyes watching nearly predatorily at the look of ecstasy building on Eren’s face. 

“L-Lee—ah! I can’t… I-I’m..” 

“Eren,” Levi growled as he felt himself begin to tighten, “Eren, now, cum. Fu—“ 

He could feel the warmth spread inside him, subtle as it was beside the, still throbbing, erection buried inside him. His own liquid heat spilling between their chests and stomachs. Their bodies falling still as every nerve seemed to radiate throughout them. Their heavy breathing did little to deter them from kissing, lazy tongues swiping over lips and weak nibbles on bottom lips. 

Wrapping both arms around Eren’s neck, he felt Eren stiffen under him. Levi’s brow furrowed. Leaning back he made to question, but his throat was too constricted to do so. It wasn’t until Eren’s finger swiped away a stray tear that he realized he was crying. 

“Leevi, does it hurt?” 

Levi smiled, a choked laugh cracking past his lips, “No, no. It doesn’t hurt at all.” 

“But Leevi… Why are you…?” 

“Shut up brat, just…,” brushing brown locks back from concerned green eyes, Levi smiled despite the dampness clinging to his cheeks, “Let’s get cleaned up alright?” 

Eren nodded dumbly, but didn’t press the subject further. His mind still buzzing from the mornings events. How quickly the day had shifted from such an oppressive atmosphere to one of the single most elating days of his life, was bewildering. And to perplex him even more, Levi had been crying, actually crying. He’d never seen the man, not a day in his life, ever, in tears. Silent as they were, it still unsettled him, and more so coupled with Levi’s initial reaction when they…. Eren’s cheeks burned at the memory. 

Levi, ignorant to the raging thoughts going on in the teens head, lifted himself up, and moved off the bed, hand cupped against his stomach to prevent the semen from dripping further down his abdomen. Eren followed his lead, doing the same to try and prevent further soiling their blankets. Had it been any other time, he wouldn’t have been able to help but quietly laugh to himself at the thought of the field day Levi would have doing laundry later. Levi began to lead them to the bathroom but stopped short, so quickly that Eren nearly ran into him. 

Turning on his heel, Levi faced Eren to place a single kiss on the bridge of his nose, a warm smile shifting into place; a smile rare for even Eren’s eyes. 

“Thank you.” 

“Thank you? For wha—?”

He wasn’t allowed to finish, as Levi turned on heel once again, casting a beckoning hand in his direction, “Shower. Now, Eren.” 

Eren just smiled, shaking his head, just happy to see that whatever upset Levi, had come and passed, “Alright! Alright!” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

They spent their time, leisurely soaking in the tub. A playful quip, here and there, and the first face bubble competition since Eren was ten, took place. Eren handing over the win to, a classic, Levi Santa. Though his own sad attempt at a troll, didn’t go unappreciated by the telltale mirth that shone in Levi’s grey eyes. He almost had him at his reenactment of an old cheesy comedy. Despite his protest, Eren had stepped out of the tub and scooped up a few handfuls of bubbles. One over each nipple, which he had to bend backwards to keep gravity from tearing away, one over his crouch and the last bit, another sad attempt at making a foam banana hovering over the crack of his ass. 

‘It’s a banana split sundae.’ 

All he received, as he wagged his tail, was a pointed look, an index directing him back in the tub, and a face full of bubbles the moment he sat down. But Levi was just hiding that smile, he mocked a fake death scene and fell back in the tub. 

Which led them to the present. 

“Your acting skills are shit, and now I need you to mop up the bathroom while I clean these sheets. Some horny brat soiled them, very rude.” 

The tease was matched as Eren strode up to him, leaning down slightly to place a kiss behind his ear, “I don’t recall that being one sided, Leevi.” 

“I never said it was one sided,” Levi smirked kissing the back of his neck, “Rather, you claimed me didn’t you? That makes all that cum your mess.” 

“Is that how it works,” Eren questioning, feigning his belief in the statement.

“Of course, my cum was your cum, so your cum stained those sheets.” 

“Ah,” Eren felt bold, perhaps it was the afterglow of sex that left him more confident, or maybe, as always, it was just Levi who could bring out the best, the worst, and everything in between out of him so easily. 

“But with that logic, I am yours, and you are mine… so it’s still ‘our’ cum and mutual horniness isn’t it?”   
“Touché,” Levi leaned into his chest, a little perturbed that he had to actually look up to ‘his’ Eren. 

“You are mine aren’t you,” Levi whispered as he wound his arms around his waist. 

“And you’re mine, Leevi,” Eren reminded him. 

“And I’m yours Eren,” Levi kissed the still bare chest, grateful Eren didn’t bother to throw on a shirt. 

To be quite honest with himself, as he glanced off to the mirror in the corner of the bedroom next to their window, he wasn’t quite sure he was ‘done’ for the day. He would blame Eren for his sudden brazen words. Steps carried them over, Eren blissfully unaware of Levi’s attention, but willing to follow him anywhere regardless. A little fact that only further to warm Levi’s heart and loins. 

“I don’t think you realize how perfect you are Eren,” Levi side stepped and maneuvered behind the teen, circling his hand around Eren’s hip and dipping down into his sweatpants. 

Eren watched, both shy and fascinated by the reflection in front of him. The suggestive, pleased quirk of Levi’s lips and the view looking down and in front of him, unable to escape his eyes. If he looked down, the purposeful movement beckoning him, resembled masturbating, but it was Levi’s hand, Levi was touching him. The knowledge left his mind whirling around fantasies he had so many times before, of touching himself and imagining Levi was the one to do so, was happening in a way that shadowed that very personal act. 

And when he looked forward, Levi reaching up to cup his jaw and force his gaze to the mirror, the lewd expression on his face and the triumph one spreading across Levi’s left him weak at the knees. Levi who was his everything, Eren who was Levi’s everything. They had each other, and they will have each other in every way possible. Eren knew now, had he seen anyone touch Levi, as Jean had appeared to be doing last night to him, he may have just reacted just as outlandishly. 

Possessiveness was just a part of their dynamic, and he saw that more and more. Through this act, their confirmation, their shift into lovers, though their hearts and bodies and souls. Eren didn’t want to share any of Levi’s smiles, love or affection, he didn’t want to share Levi at all, and he wondered, as Levi’s hand worked at him, his hand gripping tight against the window sill as his moaned aloud without shame, how much more powerful were these emotions for Levi?

As if reading his thoughts, Levi glanced to the side and tore closed the curtain that had been slightly drawn back. Nipping at the nape of his neck, Levi muttered into the skin. 

“This face, its expression and this body… they’re only for me, Eren.”

~~~~~~ 

Blue eyes widened in horror. Every muscle in his body freezing as his mind screamed for him to move. The night before had scared him. He feared for himself. He feared for Jean and Mikasa. And most importantly, he feared for Eren. 

And from what he just witnessed, what he just saw from their bedroom window, before the curtain was ripped back into place, he had every reason to be, more so than he ever could have imagined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly ~ I was going to go more into Armin's actions following this == but I want to give you guys a chapter -- and cliff hangers are like.... necessary sometimes ? maybe ? Don't throw rocks!! haha 
> 
> Please continue to track any news/progress with this and my other fics on my tumblr : again I reiterate : my user names the same there -- xoxstrifexox -- please feel free to comment/chat/leave suggestions etc so on -- I love hearing for you guys ~ <3 
> 
> Til next time!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry ~ this is short ~ I wanted to get this small piece out of the way -- 
> 
> I'll write more later but I can't promise the 5th Chapter tonight ~ Hopefully before the weekend -- Thank you all for your comments/inbox/messages/ etcetcetc I fucking love you guys and I promise one hell of a following chapter 
> 
> It'll-- hopefully-- blow your fucking minds <3

“Doesn’t it bother you?” 

Did it bother him? Of course it fucking bothered him. Was he not the one who had his arm nearly snapped off by that angry hell spawned munchkin Eren called his guardian? 

There was a million things he could say about last night, and a million more things he could ramble on about, but, honestly, he didn’t want to. The entire exchange was not something that he was willing to deal with right now. The rage he felt, was still, very much prominent. He wanted time to calm down and cool his head. Any thought of it, now, would only tempt him to drag that old bat from his little league years and knock the guy upset the head. 

Alright… So, maybe he wouldn’t go that far, but the thought sure was satisfying. Actually, he could play that image in his head all day and never tire of it. 

“Look Mikasa,” he rushed out, praying she’d just drop the subject, “I don’t want to talk about it, alright? Not right now.”

Mikasa frowned, arms crossed around her bent legs. She had drawn them close to her chest, staring off the short distance in front of her, as if debating whether or not to push the topic or leave it alone for now. She seemed to be leaning more toward bringing it back up, as her head slightly tilted, lips parting to speak, but Jean beat her to it. 

“Besides, what the hell can we even do about it? We can’t ask him anything with that creep around. I mean, Christ. I thought Eren was bad enough! What the hell is up with that nutcase?” 

Mikasa solemnly nodded, ignoring the bit about Eren. Jean and Eren got along well enough, but they butt heads just much. Jean was just one of those kids that lucked out with a picture perfect family, and a more than generous upbringing. Not that Eren wasn’t spoiled by Levi, but Eren was more humbled by the fact, whereas, Jean took it for granted at times. Neither one of them had a problem with breaching the topic, in less than civil ways, but even if they didn’t end up agreeing, whether they admitted it or not, they both would reflect on their arguments after the fact. 

Eren certainly calmed down a bit since meeting Jean and likewise. She felt they complimented each other that way. Jean had become a more tolerable person to be around and Eren seemed to learn to control a bit of his temper. Not that he made large strives by any means, but Mikasa felt he no longer had an immediate reaction to jump down someone’s throat. 

Mikasa mauled over ignoring Jean’s plea. She wanted to discuss Levi’s actions, his words even. She wanted to know, exactly, what she missed, before Armin and herself, heard the commotion. It just didn’t sit right with her. She was well aware of how overly protective, and quite frankly, downright strange, Levi was with Eren. 

Strange, she supposed, wasn’t really the word for it. She couldn’t quite label it properly. Between Eren’s odd attachment to Levi and the way Levi hovered over her friend every second of the day, was anything but normal. 

Eren, for as long as she could remember, would go on and on about the older man. Every conversation they had, every time they did or saw anything that reminded him of Levi, Eren would go off on tangents. She understood that, whatever the situation was, beyond what she was previewed, Eren had grown up under Levi’s wing and Levi’s wing alone. 

From what she could gather, when Eren spoke of his childhood, or rather, what he could remember, he hadn’t exactly had the picture perfect life. And though nothing seemed perfect in his past, one single truth remained consistent, Levi. While there was a time when Levi had struggled to provide for them, he never left Eren wanting, he provided and doted over the boy, raising him to the best of his ability, and Mikasa believed that. 

Before she met him in person, she had actually been quite excited to meet this wonderful man, who took Eren in and raised him as his own. Who helped shape Eren the cheerful, loyal and loving friend she held so dear. 

Within the first two minutes of meeting him face to face, she immediately detested him. He was rude, short, in both the way he spoke and height, and a nitpicky neat freak. She only grew to hate him more as time went by. She was grateful to him for taking care of Eren, but she couldn’t help but feel he’d over stepped his bounds as a parent. It was just too ridiculous, the way he needed to know every minute detail of what, when, and why, when it came to the brunette. 

It was, for lack of any other word to describe it, obsessive. 

Finishing her train of thought she ignored his question, she sent Jean a pointed look, “I’m worried about him.” 

“Yeah, Yeah,” Jean sighed, running a hand through the mop on top of his head, “I am to… I mean… That guy said some weird shit.” 

“What do you mean? What did he say?” 

Jean’s shoulders slumped as she drew his head back in exasperation. He knew he wasn’t going to avoid this topic. He knew that she wouldn’t just drop it. It was about her precious Eren, and fuck all else if she didn’t coddle the bastard to death in her bosom. 

Which, Jean’s face folded in irritation and groaned bitterly, he very much wished she was doing to ‘him’ at this very moment. 

“Fuck. Come on, I really don’t want to…” 

The buzz vibrating in his pants pocket and the subsequent chime of Final Fantasy seven’s victory tone, from the device, cut him off short. With a frustrated huff, because seriously, this wasn’t what he had in mind when Mikasa invited herself over, he pulled out his phone, swiped his thumb across the screen and answered.

“Hello?” 

“You do realize you called my phone, right,” the sarcastic remark was just a way to vent his aggravation of the girl sitting on his bed with an ‘Eren complex.’

“Well if you say my name as a question then yeah, I’m going to be a… What? Mikasa,” Jean looked up at curious black eyes, quickly breaking contact the moment he did. 

Jean’s brows folded in the center, “Ah… No…,” Mikasa was moving off the bed towards him, “No, she’s not here, why? Armin what’s wrong?” 

Before he could hear the response, Mikasa ripped the phone from his grip. Putting her index to her lips to shush him, she pressed the screen for speaker phone, holding the device between them. She kept an even expression, one cool enough to let him know better than to say anything about her listening in. Had it been any other girl, he would’ve snatched back his phone and set her on her way, but Mikasa was a special case. In more ones than one. 

First and foremost, he had a heavy crush on her. He did the moment he laid eyes on her. And secondly, if he had to be completely honest with himself, she could probably kick his ass with a hand tied behind her back. The chick was brutal, and every guy knew better than to cross her. 

“You promise she’s not there?” 

“Yeah,” Jean breathed out, eyes connected with Mikasa’s the entire time. 

He silently apologized to Armin. There was no way in hell, with her foot in a perfect position to end any hope of having children in the future, that he’d tell Armin otherwise. 

“Yeah, She’s not here,” he licked his lips and swallowed the truth, “What’s wrong already?”

“It’s about Eren…” 

The fierce look in her eyes and grim expression were all it took for Jean to think one solitary thought that could sum up the last 48 hours perfectly. 

Fuck it all.

~ ~ ~ ~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cliff.......hangers......... don't kill me ~ 
> 
> Also::: Next chapter.... A new character........ ERWIN?!?! but why? 
> 
> sorry......<3


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a couple little things ~ <3 
> 
> One ~ this chapter is not as far ahead as I would have liked -- but alas the weekend is at it's end and this week- before break- I have a test and a nightmare worth of drawing/computer animation/painting to do that seriously needs my attention --- so please do forgive me ! I promise the wait will be worth it -- but I wanted to post at least this much 
> 
> aaaaaand Two ~ so I realized - on tumblr - the tag for this fic title is flooded with things not pertaining at all to this story soooooo........ ok I'm going to tag any updates/news etc. under : 
> 
> xoxstrifexox fic: 'Title'
> 
> snk fic: 'Title' 
> 
> blah blah yesh yesh I'll have these tracked so feel free to blog away <3 
> 
> Thank you for all your support and enthusiasm ! Now on with the chapter!!

Warmth radiated from the body curled against him. Soft, even breaths fanned across his chest as the rise and fall of Eren’s own gently pushed against his side. He wound his fingers through loose strands of brunette hair. It was soft, not remarkably so, but smooth as it twined between his digits and tickled his palm. 

Afternoon naps were not common for them nowadays, and up until now, he hadn’t realized how much he truly missed them. The afternoon sun poured light through their windows. The curtains he had closed earlier, drawn back to allow the sheer drapes to filter the light. The reminder of why he had shut the curtains stirred a sense of euphoria of sorts. The memory of watching Eren, in front of their mirror, withering against him and clawing at his arm in ecstasy, drew a smile upon his lips. Even more so, when he recalled the confession of love repeated on his, now, lover’s lips, as and after, he came into his waiting hand. 

Sex aside, Levi’s smile brightened as he watched the gentle flutter of Eren’s eye behind shut lids, he was content either way. Just to have Eren close to him, allowing him to hold him, even after all these years. Even that would have been enough. It would have been enough if he had forever stayed by his side, even if these complex feelings were never recognized. It would have been enough just to be able to take care of Eren. For him, any future with Eren would have been enough. 

Would have, but now, with Eren edging his nose into his chest and he snuggled closer, arm draped across his mid-section and leg looped with his own, as his lover, he could never settle for any less. 

The peaceful silence was disrupted by a rectangle of light flashing on the night stand. The mobile device vibrating, thankfully, without the ringtone’s sound and ever so slowly, edging to the corner of the table, threatening to fall off. 

Levi frowned at the device. Carefully plucking it off the stand he pulled the screen into view. A picture of a short blonde male, shyly smiling with partly closed lids, met his eyes. 

Armin Arlert.  
Arlert, compared to the other two, was a potential problem. The kid was smart, quick witted to boot. While Levi was confident he, himself, could handle the menace that could wreak havoc, he wasn’t quite sure how Eren would fair. 

Armin, like Mikasa, meant a lot to the brat. On several occasions, Levi had to deal with the repercussions of Eren defending the kid. The blonde was an easy target at school, and Eren had taken it upon himself to be his personal body guard. The raven had been proud of Eren, to a certain extent. He was happy to know he had raised Eren to be just, and not just to turn a blind eye to things. 

He had seen far too many advert there gaze to the children, he’d grown up watching, abandoned and left to the streets. And, he too, had been ignored, left to fend for himself against his father’s neglect and temper. 

Even so, the emotion remained conflict. Proud, as he was, he found himself just as angry. For Eren to throw himself into danger like that was unacceptable. It would be bad enough, were Eren to get hurt on his own account, but to get hurt for someone else… 

He licked his lips as the phone buzzed in his hand. He could allow it to go to voicemail, but perhaps it would be best not to. This “problem”, needed to be situated quickly. What frame of mind would he be in, if he did not answer the call. 

Sliding his thumb across the screen he brought the phone to his ear. 

“Eren? It’s Armin. If you’re free today at all could we meet up? I want to talk to you about…” 

Apparently, even Armin could slip, but Levi saved himself the embarrassment. He could guess, already, what it was he wanted to talk about. 

“Arlert, have you ever heard of air? You should breathe it in between sentences.”

There was a pause on the other end, and a muffled sound that suspiciously sounded like a curse.  
“I’m sorry Levi Sir. Is Eren in?” 

The ‘Sir’ was certainly a bit forced, and if Levi had to guess, the kid was probably resisting the urge to speak through clenched teeth. 

“He’s sleeping at the moment,” Levi said this while glancing down at the slumbering boy. 

Truly, this kid could sleep through anything. Not one movement or sound of his voice, so much as stirred him. 

“But the brat’s been napping for a bit too long. I’ll wake him up and have him call you back.”

“Um… Uh… Yeah. Thank you that would be great.” 

The raven had to bite back a grin, hearing how confused and unsure the blonde was. He couldn’t blame him, not really. He never went out of his way when it came to Armin or Mikasa. Therefore, it would make sense that the blonde was taken back a bit. Before he let Armin say his goodbyes his voice cut in through the receiver. 

“Oh, and Arlert? Try not to keep Eren out too late with your…‘discussion.’”

The knowing tone as he stressed his last word had the desired effect. With a meek ‘Yes sir’ Arlert thanked him and hung up rather abruptly. Levi didn’t want to leave any doubt, in the boy’s mind, that he knew just what Armin wanted to discuss with Eren. A challenge, in its own way, to let him know that Levi would knowingly counter anything the litter Einstein could throw at him. He wanted him to know, just as much so, he is a presence to reckon with.

Eren shifted closer, his head nuzzling back and forth as if trying to push further into Levi’s chest. The distraction was more than appreciated. The sight was enough to draw back the smile previously adorning his face, before their interruption. 

He wished he could put it off longer, but the sooner Eren met with Armin, the sooner his point would be made. Which would mean, all the sooner, he could prove they would try to take Eren away from him. Especially if they knew the nature of their relationship, or what it had evolved into. Once Eren realized this, he would have the trio of brats out of the picture, and Eren all to himself once again. 

Scratching the back of Eren’s scalp, he coaxed him out of sleep. 

“Wake up brat.” 

As Eren’s face scrunched up, a sure sign he was exiting the realm of sleep fitfully, Levi cooed at him.

“Well aren’t you just an adorable little shit? Here, let me scratch behind your ear…” 

Levi did so, and gained a one eyed, half lidded glare. 

“Ho? Do I not have the spot right? Isn’t your leg supposed to twitch when I itch here?” 

Eren grunted, but couldn’t hide the smile. Swatting the offending hand away he grumbled.

“M’nahtadog.”

“What’s that,” Levi feigned ignorance. Though honestly, what the hell kind of sentence was that? 

“You want me to scratch your belly?”

Eren’s eyes widened, attempting to jump back from Levi’s grasp, but wasn’t fast enough to dodge him. With a bark of laughter, Eren struggled against the tickling hands at his belly, flailing around and only managing to tangle himself more between Levi and the blanket. 

Happy with his work, Levi caught Eren’s wrists and pinned them on either side of his head, landing a kiss in the center of his forehead.  
“What kind of good morning was that,” Eren asked, trying to sound offended, but the hint of glee and slight lingering chuckle he tried to bite back, gave him away. 

Moments like these, he wanted to keep forever. He wanted to ensnare them, catching every little detail, of Eren, happy and carefree. The way his voice carried, whether it was a gentle whisper or a bark of laughter. The way his eyes crinkled at the edges as he smiled too wide or the way his lips and brows pulled when he was upset. He wanted to be able to summon Eren’s image in any light and shadow. He wanted every single one committed to memory, and he wanted, more than anything, to continue to see, learn, and have more of everything Eren had to offer. 

The power this one boy had over him was alarming, frightening even. He was enraptured; completely captivated beyond reason or rationale. 

He looked down into the bright green eyes that held his heart. The light reflected in them cast a shadow of his image, somewhat like a fogged mirror. He realized, as he had realized so many times over, he was more than fine with having Eren all to himself. He wanted only him, and he wanted to be the only person, from that point on, to reflect in those eyes. He would be content with that, content with each other, and only each other. He was, and would be, fine with every ravenous thought, everything and anything with Eren, for Eren.

Eren.

Eren.

Eren. 

Eren. Eren.

Levi knew he was consumed, completely and indulgently. 

“The kind of ‘Good Morning’ I have with you,” Levi purposely stated in a dull voice as if it were the most obvious thing in the entire world. 

“Besides,” he brushed the locks of brown behind Eren’s ear, “When has anything ever been typical with us,” Levi let out with a breath. 

Eren only chuckled, turning his head to kiss Levi’s wrist. 

“Maybe it’s not typical,” Eren spoke affectionately, “But it suits us just fine.” 

“It does, doesn’t it?” 

It was less of a question and more of a statement, as he sat on his heels and motioned for Eren to sit up in the bed. Knowing he couldn’t delay much longer, he hoped breaching the topic about Armin wouldn’t destroy the light mood between them. 

“Armin called earlier.”

“Huh,” Eren faltered as he sat up, swallowing as his eyes shot over to his phone, “You answered it?” 

Levi forced a deep frown, creasing his brows as he nudged Eren’s forehead with his pointer and index, “Yeah, what about it brat?” 

Eren batted his hand away again and sighed, “Nothing, nothing. Just… surprised, I guess. Is he… Well… What did he say?” 

The raven leaned back, supporting his weight with his arms, pushing them back behind him as he shifted to get comfortable. 

“He wants to meet up with you. To discuss… ‘things’.” 

The distaste of the word, as it left his lips, gave Eren a clear indication of just how Levi felt about talking his to Armin, about whatever it was. It left him curious to know whether or not Levi knew just what Armin wanted to discus.

“Did he say what he wanted to talk to me about,” Eren picked at his left thumb nail with his right. 

Levi promptly nudged away Eren’s hand with his foot, “Don’t develop such a bad habit. He didn’t say, but it’s not so hard to guess.” 

Green eyes blinked in confusion, writing the emotion over his entire face as he parted his lips but lost the words. Was it really something so evident? 

“Us, Eren. He’s going to talk about us.” 

“Ok,” Eren said slowly, not quite following why that was significant. Of course they would discuss that much. With the way Levi reacted, it’s not like he and Eren would not be brought up. Why would it matter if he asked about how Levi….

“Oh.”

“Oh,” Levi repeated in a mocking manner, one that Eren didn’t quite appreciate. 

“You don’t have to make fun of me.”

“I like teasing you, but this is serious. You can’t be dense with this kid, he’s too quick witted.” 

“That insulting. Who are you calling dense? Jerk.” 

“Ho? Jerk am I?” 

Eren huffed, drawing his legs together, “Quit talking in circles. It’s not like you.”  
“No, I guess it’s not,” Levi let his head fall back as he thought, carefully, what to say. He didn’t want to throw accusations point blank. Eren would shut him out if he did. He would have to ease his way into it. 

But easing, was never really his thing. 

“He may end up trying to separate us.” 

“What the hell Levi? You’re being paranoid, Armin wouldn’t…” 

“Listen. Eren.” 

Eren clamped his lips shut. The corner of his lips pulling tight as he bit back his frustration. He hated being cut off. He hated when Levi wouldn’t let him finish what he wanted to say, but anytime Levi’s voice took on such an authoritive tone, he couldn’t help but be obedient, begrudged or not.

“Once that kid understands the nature of our relationship,” Levi shushed him by holding up his index, stopping Eren from denying anything before he even so much as tried, “And he will. I can guarantee you, he’s already suspicious, and whatever questions he has lined up for you, he’ll narrow it down, he’ll know. You’re not one for lying Eren. You’re an open book, too damned easy to read.”

Eren fought back any harsh remarks. Fisting his hands in his lap, he contemplated Levi’s words. Even if Armin were to find out, it wouldn’t matter. Armin wasn’t like that. If he was happy, then surely, Armin would be happy for him. He could make him understand. Couldn’t he?

“Armin…. He’s not like that. He wouldn’t…,” Eren paused, taking in a deep breath and staring headlong at the man in front of him, “He won’t. He’d accept this. He will accept it.” 

That fierce look of determination settled in. There would be no arguing with Eren at this point. Once he earnestly believed something, there was no changing his mind. But actions speak louder than words, and Levi knew Armin would not disappoint. 

“You’ll see soon enough,” Levi leaned over to grab Eren’s phone and tossed it into the hands in his lap, “Try to be back in time for dinner.” 

 

Eren felt like his eyebrows would be permanently cemented together. Every step towards the café he was supposed to meet Armin at, he swore, he could feel them literally fusing together at the middle. 

What Levi had said seemed unprecedented, ridiculous, farfetched, but frighten enough, at the same time, a nagging voice in the back of his head reminded him, it was very much possible. 

Would Armin, if he were to find out, really try to take him away from Levi? How would he even do so? He couldn’t imagine Armin not hearing him out. He could make him understand, he was sure. If it came down to it, even if he was resistant to the idea at first, he would accept it, wouldn’t he? 

The run about thoughts circling in his mind were driving him mad. His shoulders feeling heavier and heavier, as gravity itself were working against him. He couldn’t help but feel anxious. He was never good with dealing with anxiety. It did more to frustrate him than anything else, and the last thing he needed right now was to be flustered. 

He felt that whatever Armin had to say, regardless of how much he trusted his friend, he would have to remain on guard. No matter how much he wanted to believe his friend would never betray him, the thought of being away from Levi was enough to set his nerves affray. On the off chance Armin did say something, even remotely, relating to taking himself away from Levi... 

He couldn’t even complete the thought.

It wouldn’t come to that. It would never come to that. 

Roughing dragging his hand down his face, he wrapped his fingers around his chin, pinching and pulling his bottom lip out with his index and thumb in frustration. It wouldn’t do him any good thinking about this and getting worked up.  
With the café finally in sight, he spotted a head of blonde a short distance ahead. He looked a little ridiculous with his scarf wrapped so high on his neck. It covered up to his noise, keeping his face, for the most part, invisible from his cheeks down.

Trying to relax, Eren forced a smile as wide as he could manage and waved ahead calling out Armin’s name. 

When the boy responded with his own tease wave, Eren felt the coil of nervousness twisting at his insides, rearing its ugly head once more. 

He was probably looking too far into the rigid gesture. Steeling himself, he approached and greeted his friend before they passed through the doors of the café. 

Everything would be fine. No one would try to take him away. Armin wouldn’t do that to him. He wouldn’t. 

 

Levi scooped in a couple extra tablespoons of ground coffee for good measure, clicking the bin in place and switching on his brewer. A strong coffee would do well for him, or so he hoped. 

Eren had refused to let Levi drive him to the café he was meeting Armin. He understood why, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. He needed the walk to his destination to think and breathe. Between himself and the pressure he was bound to face from his ‘friends’, he needed some time to clear his head, and Levi would respect that much.

He had to keep reminding himself, that the blonde would eventually betray Eren’s trust, he knew he would, and once he did, that would be the end of it. Eren found loyalty and trust at the core of importance in any relationship he forged. Proof lie in the few and far between friends Eren had made over the years. 

While he wasn’t nearly as blunt or unpleasant as Levi knew he, himself, could be, he was very aware that Eren could come in at a close second. They both had different ways of managing their emotions, but the end product was the same. 

For them both, the cardinal rule remained the same, a rule of zero tolerance in betraying ones trust. It was a damning sin as far as they were concerned. Completely unforgivable. 

As much as it may hurt him in the short term, Levi silently wished that the blonde boy would be foolish enough to do just that, and set their friendship to ruins. 

A knock at the door drew his attention. With a sigh of loss, briefly watching the slow drip of hot, soothing beverage, taking its sweet ass precious time to prepare, he headed for the front door. 

It seemed a bit odd for Eren to be back so soon, having only left an hour or so ago, and to knock as well? It was possible he locked himself out, it wouldn’t be the first time. As he reached for the knob he grimaced.

It was unlocked. Another set of knocks sounded, and Levi realized they couldn’t have possibly belonged to Eren. He was a brute for sure, but his hand wasn’t nearly as heavy. 

Twisting the knob, he pulled back the door, arching a brow at the stranger before him. Displeased that he had to arch his head back to meet the man’s gaze. He was tall, a giant in comparison to himself. He was nearly a complete opposite to himself in contrast. 

Blond side swept hair, cool blue eyes, thick brows and squared features. The guy could have literally stepped out of a comic book. The uniform was hardly helping. 

This was certainly coming as a surprise, he could have guessed the boy to be more tactful. Or perhaps it wasn’t Armin at all? There was one brash character he could think of that would act so mindlessly. It was fine by him, she was only making this easier for him in the long run.

“Is there something I can help you with, Officer…?” 

Levi drawled out in question. His posture remained relaxed against the door jam, unable to resist the urge to cross his arms. 

Undeterred, the man smiled down on him, extending a hand forward, completely ignorant of the uninviting stance and clipped tone. 

“Erwin. Officer Erwin Smith.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so fucking sorry


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapters will be shorter than usual til the semester ends - Not too much longer to go!   
> now don't be too sad -- by shorter I only mean I won't have any 8000+ word monster chapters in the near future -- 5000 or less more than likely -- 
> 
> Well I won't blab much ~ <3 
> 
> Please enjoy and Thank you for all the wonderful feedback! <3

Couples and friends chatted around them. The echoes of their voices merging together alongside the unique sounds of the café. The girls in the opposite corner giggling in high pitched voices as the hot air from the espresso machines steam wand whistled, a mother reprimanding her child for not behaving, the chime of the door as each new customer entered. Everything solidified into a mass that could be described as nothing less than white noise. The sounds bombarded his ear drums, pounding against his temples and steadily easing him into a headache. 

Even with the sheer volume grating at him, nothing was worse than the silence between Armin and himself. It somehow remained deafening. 

His hands remained in his lap, fingers locked and thumbs pushed together, slipping back and forth as they slid harshly against and past one another. The latte, which the blonde had ordered for him, remained ignored on the table before him. 

He watched as Armin, clasping both hands around his own cup, periodically, he blew over the cap. Puffs of steam forced their way forward, dissipating in the air as they crawled toward the ceiling. Eren’s eyes followed Armin’s own bright blues, which continued to refuse to meet his own. They had to have been sitting for at least twenty minutes already, and hardly a single word passed between them. 

From the moment they stepped into the café, Armin did little more than greet him and order him a coffee. It was bad enough he was dragged out here, with no indication as to what they needed to speak about, but on top of that, avoiding him as well? 

He was left to speculate, the entire way here, what Armin may or may not ask him. He prepared himself for whatever may or may not be mentioned, asked of him, anything Armin might have to say, he tried to think of a way to respond. He was ready, as much as he could ever be given the circumstances, and now of all times, Armin did nothing more than shift his eyes and focus away every chance he had?

He wouldn’t stand for it, not another second. 

“Armin.” 

“Hm,” the blonde perked up, yet his eyes never reached him. 

It only served for him to grow even more impatient than ever. What did he mean to do by wasting his time? It was absolute bull shit. If this was as serious as Levi implied, if there was any reason he should feel intimidated by what this conservation might entail, he had every god damned right to know and now. 

No aversions, no misleading, no more distractions. No more. This wasn’t friends meeting for a drink. This wasn’t a casual meeting to just ‘hang out’. Something was boiling under the surface and burning under his skin, under Armin’s even by the looks of his stiff posture. There was a foreboding, dark and heavy, surrounding him. He was sensitive to every subtle movement, every forced breath of air pushing against the cup clasped tightly between slim, pale fingers, which lie settled in front of pursed lips. He needed to know, he needed Armin to confirm or deny what Levi told him. 

He needed to hear it. No more delays. 

“Armin.” 

The name was spoken forcefully, giving the boy no other choice but to acknowledge him. Eren waited, waited mere seconds for Armin to speak once their eyes met. The most he received was a questioning look and slightly parted lips. 

Needless to say, this did little to please him. 

“What did you want to talk about Armin?” 

When he was left with nothing to go on, not a solitary word, he felt his frustration building alongside his anxiety. 

“Spit. It. Out.” 

He watched the blonde flinch, actually flinch. Could it really be so bad? Was Levi right after all? Did he know? Would he be ok with it? 

A thousand questions burned in the back of his skull. He could feel his foot twitching as he waited for Armin to speak. Never letting his gaze waver as he silently demanded a response. 

“Armin!” 

His voice was spoken harshly under his breath and as quiet as he could manage keeping their environment in mind. He didn’t want to draw the attention of those around them and further deter his friend from, finally, speaking his mind. 

“I needed to talk to you,” he admits solemnly, and the answer does little less than infuriate him that much more. 

“Obliviously.” 

“This isn’t exactly easy for me, Eren.”

“Make it easy,” Eren grits out impatiently. 

The blonde ignored the open hostility. 

“I imagine you might know why I called you,” Armin speaks through folded brows, eyes pointed downward as they shifted side to side in concentration. 

“I have an idea,” he admitted. 

“Levi, said something didn’t he?”

Rather than let Eren answer, Armin spoke again. 

“No, I’m sure of it. He certainly said something…” 

The sentence was soft in the loud area, spoken mostly to himself though the brunette had still picked it up. Eren set his jaw, refusing to speak. He kept his intense gaze on the blonde. His rigid body language, still growing increasingly tense and irate. Licking his lips, he swore, he could feel his blood pressure rising; pounding against his ears and throbbing against his the back of his forehead. He was becoming fidgety, far too warm, and itchy even. 

Armin held the silence a moment longer. His gaze analyzing every inch of Eren’s features before he even dared to continue. 

“Eren… I saw.” 

He didn’t hear his own intake of breath, rather, he felt the burn of his lungs as he held it, waiting for Armin to continue. So he saw them? When? What did he mean by that? Saw what? What did he see? 

“The other day,” Armin’s eyes lowered, once again, to his coffee lid. As if the puffs of steam slowly thinned as it cooled, he licked his lips and swallowed before he could continue. 

“Y-Your fa… Levi. I saw Levi and you…,” he trailed off, but the look in his eyes, as found the courage to raise to Eren’s own eye level, spoke volumes which he could not. 

Eren felt the heat of his body honing in on his ears and cheeks. He couldn’t possibly have... 

“W-Wha,” Eren cleared his throat into his hand and tried to sound more firm, “What do you mean? You see us together all the time.” 

“Eren.” 

He hated that tone. He hated when someone chided him like this. The way he said it was no different from the times Levi would say his name whenever he didn’t want to hear any bullshit. But that was Levi. He was ok with Levi calling him out on playing dumb, but Armin? As dear a friend as he considered him, he found the tone to be beyond offensive in this situation. 

Why should he not play dumb when Armin wasn’t coming out and just fucking saying it? Was he just trying to get Eren to admit to things he had inklings about but no solid proof? Was Levi right in all this, and fuck, how many more times would he have to ask himself the same questions? 

“I came to the house, the morning after Levi kicked us out.” 

Armin began to choose his words carefully, Eren could tell. If nothing else, he was afraid of angering him any further. They both knew how hot headed he could get, and though Armin had never gotten the brunt of it before, he wasn’t willing to provoke any further aggression. 

“Before the curtain was closed…,” Armin sighed and steeled himself for the one question he needed to know over all else, “Is he forcing you Eren?” 

Mortification set in, his eyes widening in a way that would be comical in any other situation, “What? No! Christ Armin, he would never, how could you even think that?” 

“You consented then,” Armin breathed out, not entirely sure whether or not he should be relieved. 

“Eren, how long have you two.... been like… that?”

Eren frowned. Why was he being put under interrogation? It was none of his business anyway.

“I don’t really get what you’re asking me,” he choose to feign ignorance. 

“Please, Eren. I’m just… I’m worried about you.” 

Eren swallowed as he felt his chest constrict; guilt. He felt guilty for how he was acting, but wasn’t he justified? This entire time he was on the defensive, because he knew he needed to be to some extent. But Armin didn’t mean to accuse or attack Levi or himself, he wanted to talk. Actually talk, not blame, not scrutinize, at least, that’s how he seemed to have approached it thus far. 

He was worried, just worried. That was understandable. He didn’t know what to make of this anymore. Could Armin really be ok with this so long as it was consensual, as long as he was happy? He didn’t realize he was chewing his lip until he pulled a piece of chapped skin, causing a short gasp, as he released it from his teeth.   
Licking his abused lip Eren heaved a sigh, forcing his hand through his hair. He kept it intertwined in his messy mop, leaning his elbow against the table to hold the weight of his head. 

“Would it bother you,” Eren muttered, not quite sure how to phase the question, “If we were… like that?” 

Armin didn’t really expect Eren to admit to anything. Honestly, even this much was more progress than he thought he’d ever make. The second he touched on the topic, with Levi’s warning, he was sure Eren would have stormed out without a backward glance. 

“It bothers me,” he said slowly but quickly spoke back up, knowing if he didn’t, he ran the risk of Eren shutting him out, “But I also trust your decisions. It’s just…”

“Why would it bother you, if we were?”

The way Eren kept speaking of it, as if it wasn’t already confirmed; obvious; only confirmed that he didn’t quite trust speaking to Armin on this topic. Each step of their conversation seemed like a futile attempt at walking over egg shells. 

Leaning closer, so as not to speak to loudly, Armin clarified. 

“He’s your father Eren. It’s not normal to have that kind of relationship with your son.” 

Eren bristled, shoulders setting back as he straightened himself back. 

“We’re not related.” 

“But he ‘raised’ you.” 

Eren felt a little defeated at that. He couldn’t deny his relationship with Levi wasn’t normal, but he felt, in his heart, there was truly nothing abnormal about it; not for them at the very least.  
“It would be alright if no one else understands…” 

He spoke so softly, he wasn’t quite sure Armin had caught it. 

“Have you told anyone,” Eren asked, but quickly tacked on to remain consistent, “About what you think you saw?” 

“I talked to Jean about it, but I didn’t say anything to anyone else. I just… you two are alike in different ways, and I need to…”

“You told Jean,” he hissed incredulously, “Armin, what did you tell him?!” 

Armin raised his hands and motioned them up in down in an attempt to calm him down and urge him to lower his voice, “Not so loud. People will stare. I didn’t tell him what I saw, honest. I just told him I suspected something was up between you and Levi. That’s all I swear it.” 

“I can’t believe you talked to him about this. For fucks sake. You didn’t tell him anything else, you promise?” 

“I promise, I promise. He’s actually supposed to meet us here, but I gave him a later time. I wanted us to talk to you, but I wanted to ask you a few things privately befor-…” 

“What the fuck Armin? Are you serious? You’re getting Jean in on this?”

Panic. He was beginning to panic. Levi could damn well be right after all. It was a slim chance to be able to trust Armin, but Jean? There was no way in hell. Jean had a mouth on him, he like to talk. Sure, this was something that Jean might not necessarily go spreading around, even he had some level of sense and care. But it was too risky. It was too risky even just having Armin knowing. 

He would deny everything, whether they believed him or not. He couldn’t lose Levi. He couldn’t allow himself to be taken from Levi’s custody. Years and years of confliction and confusing emotions, now finally realized. For Levi to be taken from him now, after everything they’d been through, after everything finally became clear and all his richest desires were reciprocated, he couldn’t allow something like that to happen. The pieces began falling into place with each passing second. 

Why Levi wasn’t thrilled with his friends. Why he was so apprehensive with them. Why Levi treated them ill, as nuisances. Why Levi wanted him home schooled. Why Levi needed him to stay with him and him alone. 

Because his life, Levi’s life, they revolved around each other, they needed one another. Trust was not something easy to come by, and given their situation, they could, truly, trust no one. Anyone could jeopardize them. He knew, all too well, that their feelings were taboo. And while he didn’t care, others would seldom be so understanding. 

This was Levi warned him of. This is what Levi was afraid of, afraid, actually, completely, utterly, afraid. They could snatch him away. Even his friends, even they could set everything to ruin. The thoughts pained him, so much it physically hurt. He knew, now, he couldn’t completely trust Armin, Jean, or Mikasa. He could never truly place his faith in anyone. 

He couldn’t lose Levi. He wouldn’t. 

“I wasn’t getting Jean ‘in’ on anything. Christ, can you blame me? That man has watched you grow up, and now he has you..” 

“First of all, you have no idea what you’re even talking about. Second of all, don’t get so high and fucking mighty with me.” 

“Eren, I’m not trying to pick a fight with you, calm down. This isn’t like yo-..”

“Whether you meant to or not, you’re starting one. You’re pissing me off. Just who the fuck needs to calm down? I don’t need to calm down,” he bit back any regret he felt before. 

The idea of him being separated from Levi overriding any guilt he could feel for his harsh words, “What I need is for you’re to mind your own damned business.” 

“You’re being unreasonable. Can’t you see it from my perspective? No matter how you look at it, this isn’t right Eren. Levi’s twice your age, he’s practically your father. I thought you were just abnormally fond of him, but this isn’t healthy. This is wrong. What you two are doing is wrong.” 

Without thinking, Eren’s body lunged forward, hand fisting in the neck of Armin’s coat as he ripped him to the center of the table to meet him halfway. The screech of the table and the, now spilled, cups of coffee, cast an eerie silence over the room. One which Eren, couldn’t notice past his rage. 

“I jumped in countless times to save your sorry ass without a second thought. I had my ass handed to me, more times than I could count, sticking up for you when you need me to. I didn’t question whether you were right or wrong. I accepted that you were up against something you couldn’t stand up to alone, and I never questioned it. I never fucking questioned any of it.” 

He could feel his voice crack under the stress of his frustration. Heated tears welling in his eyes. Who was he to tell him he was wrong. He was he to say ‘they’ were wrong. 

He doesn’t understand. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t understand a damned thing. 

“I’m not asking you to accept anything. Hell, look the other fucking way for all I care,” his grip tightened as a mad glint flickered in his eyes, “But don’t you dare tell me we’re wrong. There’s nothing wrong with us.”

As if all the factious god’s of the world convened at that exact moment, Jean chose then to make his appearance, Mikasa in tow. 

“Eren! What are you doing,” Jean rushed over to separate the two, perturbed by how much force he needed to pry Eren’s hand out of the death grip he had on Armin’s jacket. 

Without skipping a beat, Mikasa rushed to Eren’s side, placing a hand on his shoulder and asking what was wrong. He didn’t hear what she said, not at first. Not until one name slip past her lips, the following sentence triggering his animosity without effort. 

“Jean! Why is Mikasa here,” Armin asked frantically. 

“She overheard everything. I’m sorry man, I couldn’t lie to her, she was right there!” 

“What did you say?” 

Eren’s voice silenced the rest. All eyes were trained on their group, Jeans and Armin’s locking on Eren, whose voice dripped with deadly threat.

As if oblivious to it all, Mikasa only faintly smiled, trying to fight back tears, “I had to protect you. I couldn’t let him put you through this. I’ll find a way to keep you safe from him. I’ll keep you safe, Eren, I promise. We can find somewhere he won’t be able to hurt you. I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner. I’m sorry.”

“What did you do Mikasa?” 

The question was spoken dangerously low. Eren’s fists balled against the table, he could feel his shoulder quiver and shake.

There was nothing wrong with them. There was nothing wrong with him loving Levi. There was nothing wrong with Levi loving him. They had each other, only each other. They were right, they had to be. Nothing else in his life had ever fit in place as perfectly as Levi did. 

“I called Social Services. They’ll take care of everything.” 

Her voice was meant to be reassuring. A futile attempt at comforting him. How could she not realize she wasn’t offering comfort at all? How could she? How could she? 

Even knowing her intentions were sound, the moment she reached to rub his shoulder blade, another vain attempt at soothing him, he felt something inside him snap. 

Smacking away her hand, he stood up abruptly, knocking back his chair in the process. His chest was heaving with the effort of his lungs to fuel his body with the oxygen he suddenly felt deprived of. He stared, hard, into the wide coal eyes in front of him. If she were anyone else, if it were anyone other than Mikasa, Armin, and even Jean, he would have their heads. 

Even now he had to fight every cell in his body from reeling his arm back. He wanted to hit her. He really wanted to hit her, and not hold back. He had to keep reminding himself that she meant well. That she only did it because she wanted to help him.

Help him?

What a joke.

“There’s nothing wrong with us,” he spat it off his tongue as if it were venom, “The only ones wrong here are you three.” 

Jean held his hands up to stop him from leaving. 

“Eren, come on don’t be like…Jesus!” 

Shoving past Jean, he sped out the door. Away from the three, whom he felt, betrayed him. Away from the gawking patrons. He just wanted to be home, away from everyone and everything, everyone and everything but Levi. 

With a baited breath, he quickly dug through his pockets, searching for his phone. Each movement urgent as he dialed then tugged the phone to his ear. Each ring urged his steps forward quicker. He needed to tell Levi. He was right, he really was right. He needed to warn him. He needed to talk to him. 

The line clicked over and Eren felt the rush of air leave his lungs as Levi greeted him. They could manage this. They could come up with some sort of plan. 

“Leevi! Mikasa calle-…”

“So you’re just now hearing it? Get home brat, we already have a guest.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Think of this as a mini chapter I suppose -- just more a little more interaction I wanted to throw in before I got to the big "TALK" between Erwin Levi and Eren.... well..... on with it then <3 
> 
> Please enjoy

“So you’re just now hearing it? Get home brat, we already have a guest.”

“A guest?” 

Eren could feel his fingers weaken their grip on his phone. He felt frozen in place. It was, as if, the blood had turned to ice in his veins. A guest? No, not just a guest. Levi’s words. 

‘So you’re just no hearing it?’ 

He knew what Mikasa had done. That’s what it meant. He knew, and the only way he could know is if someone from Social Services had already responded to the call. 

So, someone already came? How and why so quickly? 

“I should understand by now, I don’t like to repeat myself. Head home now, we’ll talk when you get here.” 

Levi ended the call before he could take in a breath to speak. 

What was he going to do? What was he going to say? 

Speaking circles around Armin was one thing, but what if Levi was already questioned? Would he be able to match his answers? Would they be convincible enough not to lead on to anything incriminating? 

He needed to get home quickly, but he needed to think of some sort of plan. He had to throw, whoever it was sitting at their house, completely off their trail. 

“Eren! God dammit Eren! WAIT!!” 

Gritting his teeth, Eren glanced back long enough to see Jean in a jogging up to catch him. There was no way in hell he would deal with him or any of them for that matter. They made a mess of things and he was stuck with the repercussions of their premature actions. 

More than just angry, he was hurt. He was hurt, despite everything that had transpired that could give them reason for concern, that they didn’t trust his judgment and Mikasa would do something so severe without so much as consulting him first. 

How could they act so callously? Were they even thinking things through at all? 

Why or how they could ever mislead themselves into thinking they were somehow helping him was beyond his comprehension. 

It ached, constricting his ribs and setting fire to this eyes, throat, and lungs. Acting behind his back without a second thought and making such a life altering decision for him. Did they even know him at all? ¬

“Eren!” 

The shout came from much closer. Without looking back to see just how close he was, Eren broke out in a sprint. He didn’t want to face Jean. He didn’t want to deal with him or Armin or Mikasa. He wanted to be left alone. He just wanted to get back to Levi and straighten this all out. 

A hand on his left shoulder gripped down, hard. His immediate reaction was to drop the same shoulder, against the hand pressing down, and spin to his left and catch the offending wrist with his left, and elbow with his right. Pushing his weight into the arm, he tried to push Jean away, hoping to force him to stumble forward, yet Jean reacted too quickly. 

Quickly, but not efficiently.

Twisting his torso, Jean tried to grab onto Eren’s arm, but only managed to grip his sleeve. Not expecting the added weight, their legs caught as Jean kicked his forward. Gravity finished the job, as both boys ended up in a twisted heap on the sidewalk. 

Eren wasn’t sure whether it was Jean or himself who threw the first punch, but he was certain he returned each one thereafter. Their struggle was brief. Jean, finally catching the upper hand as he pinned Eren beneath him. Though, he didn’t escape without a swollen lip and a bruised cheek. 

Any other time he would have taken pride in seeing the drop of blood dripping from Eren’s lip. The two of them had their spats and fair share of physical altercations, but this wasn’t anything like those times. This wasn’t like when they were childishly arguing over petty squabbles. 

“Get off me!”

“Quit being so god damned selfish!”

“Just get off!” 

“Dammit Eren! Just fucking listen for once!” 

“You three didn’t bother to hear me out! What the hell makes you think I’m willing to do so?”

“I get it! I do, but they’re just worried about you. This entire thing got fucked up but they didn’t mean it that way!”

“What they meant to do and what they did are two separate things, and you were with Mikasa weren’t you? You say they but you knew and didn’t stop either one of them! You’re just as guilty!”

“We’re just looking out for you!” 

“Then don’t!”

Their voices rose together until he hit the apex of their argument. The pinnacle, those last two words that ripped through his throat, brought them to silence as they tried to catch their breath. 

Jean searched Eren’s face for any indication, anything at all, that would tell him he hadn’t meant what he said. Did he truly mean to imply that they shouldn’t care? If they were not there to look out for him, what meaning would there be in their friendship? Did he truly mean to distance himself like this? 

“What’s the point in being friends, huh?! If we don’t look out for you then who will?”

Eren felt Jean’s grip loosen and took the opportunity to push him backwards. The strength he summoned, just strong enough to shove him off and begin to pull himself away to sit up. 

“Levi,” Eren retorted as he stood up, brushing himself off and swiping his forearm over his lip. 

“I have Levi. I always have, and he’s always considered how I felt before pulling some bullshit stunt based on assumptions. Not one of you considered how much trouble you would cause us.” 

“It was a stupid rash thing to do. Alright? But we only intended…”

“Your intentions this or that, Jean, it doesn’t fucking matter. Just…,” feeling weary and defeated, Eren’s shoulders slumped and his voice fell, “Just leave us alone.”

Jean stared at him wide eyed. The shouts of Mikasa and Armin finally catching up to the two, a short distance behind him. 

“It’s like that then? You seriously mean to cut ties with us just like that?”

Eren had to tilt his head back to glare up at the sky, trying to force back the tears and the strain in his throat. 

For Levi. For Levi and him, them… these people… would only get in their way. This was their proof; they let him down and he wasn’t willing to give them another chance to do so again. 

“That’s it,” Eren released out a lung full of air, trying to rid himself of the weight bearing down on him with this decision, “That’s it, just like that.” 

He wiped his lip. Allowing his tongue to swipe between them to wet them, the coppery taste hit the tip of the muscle. There was nothing more he could or be willing to say at this point. 

He had to keep himself from glancing over to, what he was sure to be, the disbelieving look Jean had to be wearing. As he turned away he could hear Mikasa and Armin’s questions in the background, but he didn’t stop. His mind was set, no matter how painful. 

He loved his friends. He truly did, but this? He never thought he could make such an easy decision. Had he been asked before this if he could ever turn his back on his friends, for Levi or vice versa, he would have stubbornly denied it. He would’ve argued that he would find a way to keep them both in his life. 

He loved them. He did. He just hadn’t realized, that given a situation like this one, how simple a decision, no matter how conflicting in his heart, it could be to leave them behind.

He could hear Jean telling Armin and Mikasa not to go after him. In his heart, he wavered, he wished they would. He wished they could convince him otherwise; somehow guarantee that they wouldn’t do something as rash as this again.   
But there were no true guarantees; it wasn’t worth the risk. Not if it meant even the slightest possibility of losing Levi.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shorter chapter - earlier release? Yeah sure why not -------? I wanted to get you guys something and I don't want to spend forever writing out one chapter when I can give you multiples -- I don't think you mind - or at least I hope you guys don't mind 
> 
> That aside ~ <3 This fic hit 7000 hits ....... you guys are awesome ~ <3 I love your faces truly Thank you! And I love hearing back from you all the comments I've recieved have been wonderful! 
> 
> Without further aadoooooooo here' -is' -- the chapter <3

Opening the cabinet open, he extracted two coffee mugs by their handle. The two bumped together in his grip, the high pitched ‘ting’ from the glazed ceramic causing him to wince involuntarily. Setting them down on the counter, the sound lower as it met the granite surface, he reached over to the freshly brewed pot of coffee. 

“Do you take milk or sugar,” Levi asked, a little louder than usual, to the man in his getting comfortable in the other room. 

“Do you have cream?” 

“I don’t. Just milk.” 

“Then milks fine, no sugar.” 

Nodding, more so to himself, Levi fetched the jug from the fridge and made the officer his coffee, before pouring his own. Putting the milk away, he grabbed both mugs and moved to the couch, opposite to the love seat the other was currently occupying. 

Handing him his coffee, he received a polite thank you, to which he nodded and sipped his own. The bitter liquid on his tongue relaxed him. He only wished he could truly enjoy the cup without the unwanted company. 

“Erwin, was it?” 

The blonde with the perfectly side swept part, god knows how much wax he would need to keep it in place like that, Levi inwardly cringed, offered a close mouthed smile as he swallowed what drink he had in his mouth while nodding. 

With a refreshed sound, which reminded him of those corny soda commercials, Erwin swallowed with an ‘Ah’. 

“Yes and thank you. The coffee’s tastes wonderful.” 

Unamused with the pleasantries, Levi barely grunted out, “It’s coffee.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, just why are you here, Erwin,” Levi spoke, knowing well why he was here. Holding the mug in his usual fashion, he lifted it to his mouth and tilted his hand back to take another sip. 

“What a peculiar way to hold a mug,” Erwin smiled with a slight tilt in his head in, seemingly innocent, curiosity.

Levi scoffed, taking one more drink before replying, “Eren says the same thing. But, if you wouldn’t mind, I did ask you a question. Considering the circumstances,” Levi said while gesturing to his uniform, “I’d like to know the reason for your visit.”

The smile never left his face, if anything, it only seemed brighter. It was almost unnerving. This man hadn’t faltered at all, not once. White, polished teeth were revealed by the open curve at the corner of thin lips. 

“I suppose an explanation is in order, of course.” 

Almost, as if to tease him, the other male set his mug on the coffee table in front of him, adjusting himself to sit up more comfortably. The deliberate pause, tempted Levi to grip his handle that much tighter.

What point was there in drawing this out? Was this guy purposely trying to get under his skin or was he really just this agitating? 

“So it seems there was a call made to the department of social services.” 

Not elaborating further, Levi felt his eyebrows dip. 

“If that’s the case, shouldn’t I be sitting with a suit rather than a uniform?” 

Erwin chuckled at the choice of wording.

“Indeed, one would expect that. However…” 

He leaned forward to rest his elbows on his thighs, linking his fingers together and pulling his thumbs back to allow his chin to rest on them. 

“It seems the ‘tip’ had no real evidence to back the claim. As a matter of fact, the caller even went as far as to admit they were not even the ones who witnessed or heard said claim. Naturally, there are more critical cases to be handled, and the department decided not to get directly involved. At least not until there is further investigation.”

Leaning back again, he waved one hand to the side with a sigh, “Essentially, they left it to the local police department, and here I am.” 

“Here you are.”

Levi repeated, humming over his coffee before setting it down as well. Leaning back against the couch, he rested his elbow on the arm and held his hand in his palm. His free hand sitting on his thigh, where his fingers absent mindedly drummed against the muscle.

“The claim being?”

“Elicit relations with your son.” 

The only change in his features was the arch of his brow and a displeased frown, “That’s quite a claim.” 

“It is,” Erwin agreed, his tone quite a bit more serious than it had been early.

Noting the change, Levi locked his gaze with the other male, not once letting it waver. No better way to tell a lie than to keep steady eye contact. 

“It’s also quite unprecedented. Honestly, it’s a waste of your time as much as my own.” 

Erwin’s features lightened once more, a humored smile slipping onto his lips through squinted eyes, “It seems that way, doesn’t it? Waste of time or not, I’m unfortunately required to intrude for a few questions. For yourself and the boy,” he clarified. 

The blonde watched his every move, and he was sure, the quick tick of his brow when Eren was mentioned, did not go unnoticed. Levi had figured he’d have to deal with someone sooner or later, thanks to Eren’s previous company. The issue didn’t really lie in that. He was prepared, but Eren was a little less… predictable. 

He didn’t like the idea of putting more stress on him than necessary. If anything, to save them both the trouble, and on Levi’s part, some guilt, he would rather he handled this thoroughly on his own.   
Given the situation, however, he was fully aware that Eren wouldn’t have such a luxury. 

Speaking of which, he should be back any moment now. Glancing over to the clock, he made a sound akin to a tick of impatience. 

“He should be here shortly. The café’s not that far a walk from here. I’d prefer if we handled this quickly so I can prepare dinner in a timely manner.”

Erwin hummed in reassurance, “It shouldn’t take long.” 

Not wasting a moment, he edged in, his voice taking an intrigued tone, “Do you tend to do the cooking? I’ve never been much of a chef myself.” 

Levi frowned, not one for idle chatter, and given the situation it hardly seemed any more appealing at the moment. 

“I do,” Levi eyed him for any tells as to where this conversation was going, “I can’t trust Eren with a stove. He’d likely burn the kitchen alongside the meal.”

Erwin let loose a warm chuckle. To anyone else, it would sound inviting, friendly, comforting, but to Levi, he found it artificial, an act. This character was not going to fool him. No such person could be as picture perfect as ‘Erwin Smith’. 

“I suppose than you don’t have a lady friend to treat you to a warm meal now and again.” 

To this, he only began to solidify his conclusions. Narrowly on topic, a simple and innocent question in nature. He wasn’t buying it. This guy seemed cunning. He couldn’t help but feel he needed to be careful around this man. He felt the need to watch his gestures, be careful of his words, but not by side stepping too often as to raise suspicion. 

It was still early on to have any concrete idea of who and what this man was; what he was capable of. Regardless, his gut was telling him to be cautious, and right or wrong, he would follow it. 

“I work from home, as you can imagine, I tend not to make play dates with ‘lady friends’.” 

“Ah, I see,” Erwin smiled in a way that made it seem like Levi let him in on a big secret, “I’d ‘imagine’ it must get lonely at times.” 

Anyone else, he would presume, at this point would slip. They’d buy in, maybe say something they shouldn’t or play it off in an obvious way. Too bad for him, Levi wasn’t ‘like’ just anyone else. 

Reaching for his coffee, Levi leaned in a bit suspiciously, his face still as flat as ever, contrary to the teasing voice he used, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d take that as an offer Mr. Smith.” 

Settling back and sipping his coffee, he found the sudden quirk of interest in his reply. He certainly wasn’t expecting that, and judging by the way Erwin’s features minutely widened, he successfully took him for surprise, however…

The features quickly eased back into something more troubling; amusement. 

He only served to give this man a challenge. Levi and Erwin both knew, every word would be countered, nudge for nudge, they could go back and forth and at this point, there was no telling who would give. Levi, however, simply had more incentive to win these little battles; he had so much more riding on this. Whereas, Erwin was probably trying to pass the time with some entertainment on a bogus call. The trick was, he needed to make sure Erwin never thought of it as more than that. 

With mirth in his eyes, Erwin laughed it off.

“Now, now. That would be unprofessional of me, and besides, I’m afraid I’d be no better help than Eren in that department.” 

“Can’t say I’m disappointed,” Levi muttered a bit bitterly, wanting to have thrown Erwin more off track. 

If anything, he seemed delighted. Whether by himself or Levi he wasn’t sure, but either way, it was infuriating.

Changing the topic rather abruptly, Erwin relaxed his posture. 

“So just Eren and yourself than? What about family member? It must be hard raising a teenager by yourself?” 

Levi had to resist the urge to grind his teeth. 

“We don’t have any immediate family,” Levi spoke slowly, casually trying to diffuse his interest, “And Eren’s not bad for a brat. He takes care of himself well enough, cleans properly and studies. He wipes his own ass, if you don’t mind the expression, it’s fitting.” 

“I don’t mind at all. As a matter of fact, I think the only worry would be if you did. It might prove my visit wasn’t completely unfounded.” 

Levi gave him a look of distaste, “Trust me, something that disgusting is the furthest worry you should have.” 

“Ha-ha, I suppose you’re right. Though are you saying there is something to worry about?” 

“Hardly,” Levi sighed out, “I don’t like to repeat myself. You’re visit here is a waste of our time and yours.” 

Erwin mouthed the choice of word, ‘Our’, as if it was somehow incriminating but didn’t push. Instead, he steered back on track with the previous question. 

“You mentioned not having any immediate family. I’m sorry to hear that. I was raised to believe families quite important and substantial influence. It must be that much more difficult for yourself to handle such responsibilities on your own.”

“Eren’s family enough,” Levi retorted, but this time taking an edge on his tone at the direction this was headed. 

‘Family’, as one that would define it, was nothing more than an evening TV program. Some hog wash, Brady Bunch bull shit. The ‘ideal’ American family as one would have it. It was an advertisement. Nothing more than a falsified image of how things should be, and how, for Levi, they most certainly had not. 

“And your father?”

Levi’s face darkened. He wouldn’t have been able to hide the expression even if he willed himself to try.

“Excuse me?”

The click of the door jam and the sound of the door opening and closing stole his attention. Happy for the reprieve, he glanced over.

“It’s about time. You should’ve been here… Eren?” 

His heart shrank when he saw the tussled mess of hair and bruised cheek. Standing up, he couldn’t help but rush over to inspect the damage. Eren tried to brush him away, saying he was fine, but he insisted on assessing each bruise, swollen areas, scraps, and cuts. 

It took only seconds for the emotions to grow heavy in his chest. The worry turning to rage, which he bit back in light of their company. Wanting nothing more than to pull him in his arms, Levi forced himself to step back and walk toward the kitchen.

“Eren, make yourself comfortable on the couch. I’ll grab some disinfectant.” 

“But Leevi, I don’t need…” 

Levi stopped, shooting him a look over his shoulder, “Eren. Don’t be rude, introduce yourself. I expect a full explanation after you two are acquainted.” 

Eren did as told. Hanging up his coat and placing his shoes, neatly, on the drying mat, he made his way over to the couch. Taking in the sight of the unwelcomed man, he frowned, but immediately corrected his expression into a kind smile. Or at least what he could manage, flinching as the aching of his cheek was aggravated. 

“Hi,” Eren greeted him awkwardly as he rounded to the couch, extending his hand, “I’m Eren. I’m… Uh.. Sorry for my appearance.” 

Taking his hand in a quick shake, Erwin shook his head, “It’s a pleasure to meet you Eren, I’m Erwin Smith.”

With a tinge more concern and authority Erwin offered, “You can confide in me,” he gestured to his face, “If you were put in any danger, I can take care of it.” 

Eren, looked off to the side, a little embarrassed. Seriously, this guy might as well have come out of a Disney picture book. He could only imagine the field day Levi would have punching out jokes about this guy, but on the other hand. 

The brunette caught himself staring and mortifyingly enough, only flustered himself more. He was fairly attractive… With that thought came the twinge of jealousy, and that thought that maybe the same thought crossed Levi’s mind. Or worse even, did it occupy it? Shaking the thoughts from his head, he straightened his back, pulling his hand back to fondle the belt loops on either side of his jeans. 

“It’s alright… Just an argument with a friend.” 

“You shouldn’t be so modest. A friend shouldn’t hurt you, especially not physically. That goes for anyone, and you should be honest about it. You can tell me, Eren.” 

Erwin raised his brow in a disapproving manner, and for whatever reason, it made him feel like he was being reprimanded in a way. He didn’t appreciate it at all, though, recalling Levi’s words he stomped down the feeling. 

“I understand. Thank you, it’s not necessary this time,” Eren slowly sat down, his body a bit sore from tumbling down on the concrete.

Already rested, it slipped his mind that he must be filthy. And for him to sit on the couch with his clothes in such a condition? He was sure to hear about it later. 

“I’ll come to you if ever need be, I promise,” Eren forced a smile, trying to appear as natural as possible, but it was hard to hide the tempting grimace from his features. 

At the very least he could brush it off as pain. 

Levi came back into the room, antiseptic and a cotton ball in hand. With only very little protesting, Eren leaned his head back for Levi to dab over any open scrapes or cuts to clean them out. A small hiss would leave his lips when a particular spot stung, and Levi would only chide him, telling him he shouldn’t have fought in the first place. 

It would be easy to forget the elephant in the room, had Levi not been watching him out of the corner of his eye. Now more than ever, he wanted to get this farce over with so he could kick out the officer and find out exactly what happened. 

“After we finish our discussion here, I expect you tell me what happened.” 

Eren caught his wrist and was tempted to whine, “Alright, Alright, I promise.” 

Levi frowned and shook off Eren’s wrist. Eren in turn, realizing the ‘elephant’ dropped the wrist as if it burned and nodded more formally. 

“I will.” 

Erwin only smiled warmly, eyes trailing from Levi’s wrist back up to meet the older man’s eyes, “He seems like a good boy, you’ve raised him well. Though, you seem quite the mother hen.” 

Levi narrowed his gaze at him for a moment. Just what was he getting at with this attempt at playful banter? 

“Hardly.”

“For someone who cooks, cleans, scolds and cleans up their son with a cotton ball, you certainly do fit the profile, you must admit. I am somewhat of a detective,” he grinned with a gesture of his uniform.

Watching Eren’s eyes shift between the two, it was easy to click into place. Levi inwardly groaned, ‘Don’t you dare fall into this horse shit Eren.’

“That wasn’t what I would call a ‘scolding’,” Levi sat down a comfortable distance from Eren, and kicked his leg over his bent knee. 

“What is it we need to discuss,” Eren bit out a little impatiently.

Erwin’s grin never faltered, causing both Eren and Levi to wish they could wipe it off his features. 

“Ah, yes. I actually posed a question before you came in.” 

Levi’s back stiffened a bit, and Eren felt himself shrink in the suddenly tense atmosphere.   
“We were discussing how difficult it must have been for Levi to raise you on his own. When I asked about immediate family, I was sad to hear you two have been on your own. However, I was curious.” 

Eren resisted the need to fidget, scratch his nails against his jeans or otherwise preoccupy himself. Just glancing over to Levi’s expression, neutral as it appeared, unsettled him because he knew better. He knew that look, to anyone else, it may have been bored or disinterested, but to him, it was anything but calm. 

“About Levi’s father.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DADDY ISSUES *runs away*


	10. Chapter 10

The room seemed heavier. As if the air had been filled with particles of powder so fine you couldn’t physically see it, but immense enough in volume to suffocate you, slowly, as it filled your lungs. He didn’t want to breathe it in. This smothering atmosphere convincing him keep what air he had in his lungs. Holding his breath, he felt if he let it out, he would draw in this odd tension in on himself. It was completely overwhelming. 

Levi’s eyes had taken on a flicker, something like a shadow which he had seen on so few rare occasions, dulling his eye. These rare occasions which left him near paralyzed in a desperate fear. A fear, of what, he didn’t know. He didn’t want to know. Levi was kind, and loving. He took him in, cared for him, loved him beyond what he ever could have wished for, and he was grateful; he had and will always be grateful. But there was something beneath what he knew. There was a silent shadow, a stalking butler that kept itself hidden from the light. It was a darkness he couldn’t imagine Levi ever possibly capable of until he saw the intensity burning in his blank stare. 

It was the fear he felt when Levi had pinned him against the kitchen counter. Demanding, with a single minded task. Ruthless, as it surged forward for what he wanted without consequence. It was the same fear when shadows overlay the hollows of his eyes as a silent threat passed on to the ones he called friends. But the most frightening part, was not knowing ‘why’ he had that look now, at the simple mention of his father. 

What could have possibly happened? Did he even want to know?

Erwin on the other hand. Eren, cautiously chanced a glance, unnerved him in an entirely different way. His expression was cool, smug under the guise of a smile. How he managed to seem relaxed and casual through the intensity of this moment, in reality only seconds long, that seemed to stretch into minutes, was beyond his understanding. He held a smooth kind of indifference when dealing with Levi. He was analyzing; calculating. Every word. Every movement, every gesture, glance, and look. It wasn’t a fear of what he might do, but more so, a fear of what this man was capable of. 

How could this man just sit there and exude a feeling of nonchalance? What exactly did he have hidden under his sleeve? It was like, at any moment, he would slap down a trump card that neither of them could throw out. 

Out of the corner of his gaze, he could see Levi shift. The dark look passing as quickly as it came, but he still seemed tense; reluctant even. If this was something Levi didn’t want to talk about there was a reason for it. Besides, it has always and only ever been Levi and himself. Furthermore, there was no reason to ask such a question in the first place. It had nothing to do with why this man was here, and everyone in this room knew that much. 

This was about Mikasa. This was about Armin and Jean. This was about the relationship that came into light that needed to be denied to the public eye. Nothing more, nothing less.

“Excuse me, Mr. Smith.” 

He surprised himself on how firm his voice was. He was afraid it would shake. He felt slightly light headed, still overwhelmed in this situation, but he managed to remove it from his voice. In comparison, he was nothing more than a mouse between these two. They danced around each other, akin to two entities waiting to tear apart throats, in this strange charade masked behind polite words. At any point in time, he felt he could get caught in the fray; tilting the favor in either of their hands, but he wouldn’t sit still. He wouldn’t hold silence. He didn’t care if he didn’t fully comprehend this meeting between lions. He didn’t appreciate this man pressing Levi to make such a dangerous expression. 

His blood was boiling from the simple fact that this man had upset his lover in such a way; somehow trying to insinuate some meaning that remained lost on him. He wanted this finished and taken care of. He wanted this man out of their home and away from Levi and himself. He wanted to curse Mikasa’s meddling more than ever now. It was one thing to upset him, and putting aside the burden it had placed on their relationship, he was outraged that Levi would be subjected beyond that by this man. 

The deep harmony of Erwin’s voice, and the confidence in the way his words flowed through his lips, only further added fuel to the flame as his initial intimidation melted into rage. 

“Yes, Eren?” 

“With all due respect…”

Eren forced himself not to grit out the words, because he certainly didn’t care about upsetting this man if not for the consequences it could have against Levi and himself. 

Erwin gestured with a short wave of his hand for Eren to continue, “Go on.”

“I understand why you’re here. I know why you’re here,” he wanted to make himself clear and he wanted to make Erwin understand that they should deal with the matter of hand and that alone. 

“I’m curious,” Smith interjected, “What do you know about the nature of this visit, I wonder?”

This time he did feel his teeth grind. The way he spoke his question, the condescending tone fit for that of a five year old. He was being treated like a child, like he knew absolutely nothing of what was happening and why. 

At another other time, Levi might have settled a hand on his shoulder to try to ease the tension from cording each muscle into a knot, but now he remained a fair distance away, despite the short length of the couch. 

It was bad enough, the way Erwin was stirring up his aggressions, but the simple fact that his presence meant keeping himself from Levi… The idea of this distance, of why it was created and why it was necessary to play pretend, forced the bitterness to seep into his words. 

“This is all because of Mikasa,” Eren grit out, “She called in with a made up story about my father and I having a relationship.”

It felt strange to use the term. He hadn’t considered Levi his father, for as long as he could honestly remember, he couldn’t recall calling him by such a label. At a point and time, he could remember calling him big brother, but even that was a time to distant to clearly remember.

To him Levi was everything, and while he took care of him, raised him, taught him right from wrong and mentored him in a way one might associate with a father figure, he couldn’t bring himself to think of him in such a way. As he became older, he recognized; realized, that these feelings went beyond that of platonic love. Levi meant the world to him, everything. Everything he had, and everything he could want. In this moment, as he felt nothing more than the need to protect him, he understood, even just a little bit more, how Levi felt. 

Though grateful that these events managed to define his confusion, becoming graspable and wrapping his mind, that much more, around his lover, he could not excuse this man or his friend’s actions. 

“A young lady did indeed call this in,” Erwin said thoughtfully, “Though I can’t figure out why she would make such a call without reason.” 

Every word was indirect and direct all at once. It was as if his words played around the subject while he clearly highlighted what questions were being asked at the same time. This man was a conundrum; complicated and simple, subtle and forward. It was falling into place; this man could be very dangerous if they weren’t careful. He couldn’t take this man lightly. 

“Mikasa’s just trying to get back at me.” 

“Eren,” this time it was Levi’s voice who interrupted. 

When he glanced at him, he expected Levi to reprimand him into silence with only looks alone. Yet he was surprised to see the slight nod accompanied with a command to say what he needed. Encouragement. He felt his chest swell with pride that Levi trusted him in this fragile moment. If either one of them were to say the wrong thing, who knew what could happen. He had the utmost faith in him, and he wouldn’t let him down. 

Erwin tilted his head in question, bending his index of his lips with a curious furrow of his brow, “Go on.” 

Eren swallowed, it would hurt him in a way to do this. To lie about a friend he truly cared about, even despite this, and even despite wanting to lash out at her, he still held respect for her and his small group, but Levi took precedence over all else. If he had to drag someone through the mud, ultimately, every time, he would do so to be with Levi. No matter how much it hurt them or himself, though in all honesty, he would try to take the brunt of it himself. 

“I haven’t told anyone else, why I mean,” Eren let out a shaky breath, looking from Erwin to Levi in a show of reluctance.

“She asked me out, was pretty persistent about it. She’s always been obsessive when it’s come to me. You can ask anyone at school. She’s a good friend, but that’s all I see her as, but she wouldn’t accept that. She couldn’t.” 

Erwin seemed to be hiding a smirk, and panic itched at him, but he refused to believe the man saw through his act already. It was very true what he said. Every word of it actually. Mikasa had asked him out before, and she had and still was very protective of him, but the reasons she had for calling had nothing to do with that. 

“I think I can see where this is going,” Erwin commented and added, “However, why go so far as to…”

Eren cut him off quickly. If he were to be convincing, he would have to do so now. With a shout, clenching his hands into balled fists, he bowed his head and closed his eyes tightly.

“I-I’m gay!” 

Silence filled the room, and Eren licked his lips, eyes hidden by his hair. After a pause, he carefully continued, doing his best to keep his voice nervous, low, and shy. 

“S-She blames Levi. She told me that if he raised me correctly I wouldn’t have ended up this way,” summoning tears he grit through his teeth, “She won’t accept it. She won’t accept me, and Jean… He took her side and…,” he miserably gestured to the cleaned cuts and bruises, “that’s why, today…”   
Eren’s voice broke off as he pulled in a sob. Perhaps it wasn’t the best excuse he could come up with, but Eren knew she needed some type of motivation. Why else would someone do something so drastic? But to go to such lengths for this type lie, was a stretch, and he knew that. He needed to play it off, as much as he hated to do so, as unstable teenage hormones. As kids reacting and taking immature action. They were still young, close to adults, but still at an age where recklessness could be excused to a certain extent. Eren turned his head away, purposely exposing his neck as he craned his head to look to Levi.

“I’m sorry, I should have said something sooner. I didn’t think she would…” 

“Did those marks on your neck come from Jean as well,” Erwin asks off handedly.

“Huh,” Eren turned his head quickly, as if shocked at the question. His mouth agape as he stared like a fish with his head cut off, cognitive responses limited to the opening and closing of his mouth before his cheeks burned into a blush.

“N-no, they’re not…,” Eren swallowed and hid his eyes behind his hand, “T-They’re from Armin…”

“Armin?”

“Yes… I… um… This is... this is how she found out,” Eren mumbles as if embarrassed, “S-she saw us in his room, and Armin… He didn’t want Mikasa to hate him… So we’re not…”

As if remembering where he was, Eren’s head shoots up to turn to Levi, “I-I didn’t want… I wanted to tell you… talk to you, but I didn’t know if… if…” 

“Oi, brat,” Levi finally spoke, silently impressed by his dramatics. 

Even with the story seemingly a bit stretched, more akin to a drama series, it wasn’t entirely without merit. He covered his bases. Mikasa would be discredited, as would Jean’s word, and even Armin wouldn’t be able to say anything. He had them all wrapped together. Each one would stand for each other’s stories yet they would need word outside of their small group to make any real argument. Tied together, their words meant little to nothing. He’d have to remember to give Eren quite the treat once they convinced the ken doll they were nothing more than father and son, apparently victims of a hormonal and infuriated teenage girl whose love was unrequited. 

He reached up to pull his hand from his face and ruffled his hair. The gesture was patronal; something any loving father would do to comfort their son. Whether or not it was convincing was still yet to be seen. For now, they just had to run through this act without faltering. 

“I raised you better than that, don’t assume things so easily.” 

Erwin cleared his throat, as Eren wiped away any leftover tears he had shed.

“I’ve had teenagers do stranger things, though, this is a serious matter. I apologize for how inconvenient this may be, so let’s try to wrap this up. It’s only protocol that I have all the answers I need to dismiss this accusation, so Eren, I apologize again, but I’ll have to intrude just a bit more.”

Eren nodded his head, none too happy that this character would still choose to push forward, but he seemed to at least buy into this charade; that was what mattered most. While he wished he wouldn’t have to see Levi become upset again, if it meant that they’d be left alone for good, then so be it. No matter how frustrated or angry he’d become, he would hold his tongue, for both their sakes’. 

“I understand…” 

Erwin’s warm smile converged along the lines of sympathy and one of compassion; in Levi’s eyes a mere feint. 

“I can see you two are close. I’m sorry you had to say so much in such a circumstance.” 

“What was it you had to ask,” Levi cut in a little impatiently, “I’m sure you can understand, it’s been a long day.” 

Erwin nodded, still not phased at all with the rudeness, “Of course. Perhaps this is more for my own curiosity, however, it is relevant in its own way I assure you.” 

“Earlier, I had asked if you ever received help in raising Eren. I just want to better understand the dynamic of your relationship, and why it would be so misconstrued. From what we’ve covered, you have no relatives to help you, but a few details seem…. Left out. If you will.” 

“Ho,” Levi questioned and sat back, still waiting to get the point as his mood slowly began to darken, “And what details are those?” 

Eren’s brows furrowed, just what was this man speaking about? It was Levi and himself, it had always been just Levi and him. What could be so confusing about that? What details were there to share? Levi found him, took him in, signed the necessary papers and ‘adopted’ him, the rest to this point falling in line, at least for the public eye. Everything was normal, wasn’t it?

“It’s a bit unclear,” Erwin begins, dragging out the moment, in what Levi feels is an attempt to further rouse his frustration. 

It could be that this man thinks he can somehow slip a detail he hadn’t meant to reveal? Whatever the reason, Levi wouldn’t make such a careless mistake so easily. 

“You see, it appears as if your mother was paying child support up until you became of age. Your father, at the time, was also receiving unemployment and food stamps. At the time, you were still living at home in your father’s care. Am I correct?” 

Levi remained unfazed, “You are.” 

The brunette’s head snapped to face Levi. He never, not once, mentioned his father. Sure, he had to assume at some point Levi was with his parents, but he honestly knew little to nothing of his past. 

“What perplexes me, is your father never reapplied for any of his benefits. Curious yet, you mentioned raising Eren on your own. Given your age now, alongside Eren’s, and assuming you took him in within a year or two of his birth, that places you close to 15 or 17. That’s a fairly young age to raise a child on your own, and a baby at that. At that time, were you not still living at your father’s residence? It’s strange for a grown man to up and disappear from this story wouldn’t you think?” 

“You have quite an array of assumptions, Smith.”

“None without careful consideration.”

Eren’s felt his face scrunch, opening his mouth to speak out in anger, but Levi’s response quickly snapped his mouth shut.

“I find your consideration lacking,” Levi bit out, no longer able to feel patient as he had been.  
“A neglectful father disappearing once he’s soaked up all the benefits he could from his child and taking off when he no longer has a use? Is that really so strange?” 

Levi felt Eren’s eyes locked on him, he knew he’d have much to talk about later on. Not that he would be thrilled to do so. The kid would bombard him with a hundred questions. No, a hundred probably wouldn’t be enough. It be a miracle to shut him up, but it was a talk that, he knew, might eventually come up. What details to divulge in were really the main question, but that was later. Much later. 

For now, he had to deal with this overgrown turd, with enough hair gel to lube and elephant, on his couch. 

“You seem like that type that had a happy home. Someone to wipe your ass for you and tell you your shit didn’t stink,” Levi felt his temper flare, but he couldn’t help it, “I think for you it may be strange or unlikely, but for myself and so many other children in that shit hole of a ghetto, it was ‘reality’.” 

Erwin nodded, smile no longer present but still, somehow, humble in his own way, “I can see I’ve stepped over bounds here. It was mere curiosity on my part, though it did pertain to Eren’s well-being, so I do hope you understand.” 

“At least that much I can be grateful for,” Levi admitted but shot him a venomous look, “But rather than going at my throat, perhaps you should tackle those restless shits who are harassing my boy? The only harm I’ve seen done to this brat is from that group of fanatics. Their actions are intolerable. Slander, harassment, and now even violence,” Levi annunciated his point by gesturing his thumb to Eren’s banged up appearance. 

“Your curiosity is obviously misguided.”

“So it seems,” Erwin agrees as he begins to stand up.

Levi silently follows as Erwin makes his way to the door, laying a hand on Eren’s shoulder as he passes to let him know to stay put for now. As the blonde pulls each arm into his jacket, Levi is already eager to open the door; hand already resting on the door knob.

As Erwin adjust his coat, stepping past the threshold after Levi had opened the door, he pauses with a sudden ‘Ah!’

Levi feels his teeth grinding as the man turns around, his jaw tight. Just what in the hell else could this man want? Didn’t he come what he came for? Were they not convincing enough? Just what the hell did he want now? 

“I realized tonight was a bit much, on both of you,” Erwin carried an apologetic tone, though his face didn’t quite match it, “However…”

He reaches in his jacket and produces a card, handing it off to Levi. The raven stares at it as if it were a giant wet hairball, as if offended by the small rectangular card stock. He forced back a scowl at it, vowing to burn the damn thing the first chance he had. 

Without paying attention, he nearly jumped, realizing Erwin was leaning not but an inch from his ear. The warm huff of a chuckle, and the smell of the coffee he drank earlier, made his senses cringe. 

“There are some more things I’d like to ask you,” Erwin’s voice was lower than before. Something about it making Levi feel uneasy, but he wouldn’t let this man know that. Standing his ground, he didn’t say a word, eyes watching the other as if he were a mere beast. 

“In private,” Erwin softly whispered before pulling back, “Well, Thank you for your time today.”

Stepping off the stoop and down the stairs, he paused one last time, catching Levi right before he shut the door. 

“Ah, and Levi?”

Narrowing his eyes, Levi stared and waited, no longer willing to speak on the matter or any matter any further.

“You should consider enrolling Eren into a school for theater, he has quite the knack for it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly have a terrible migraine -- So I'm going to stop here - I just wanted to get you guys another chapter -- my roomies moving in tomorrow so I'll have to help her -- 
> 
> NEXT CHAPTER : 
> 
> Eren questions need answers! 
> 
> A stroll down memory lane!
> 
> And possible smut! 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 37 pages..... 9928 words.... fucking good luck people! Haha I don't know how this happened....
> 
> OK - SO BTW I FIBBED!! 
> 
> I posted on tumblr ( and probably a comment or two ) That there would be switching..... er..... it didn't quite happen..... GomenGomen ~ I'm sorry! I got carried away and the moment and the feels and Levi and Eren and Riren and....... SORRY
> 
> I'm letting down Ereri fans in this chapter I think... but.... like...... theres always next time? 
> 
> SORRYSORRYSORRY OK ENJOY!

Levi shut the door behind him, leaning his weight against it as he crumpled the card in his grip. Erwin was certainly a mystery. If he suspected everything up to that point was nothing but theatrics then why let them go? What did he gain from dismissing this case and leaving with a promise of setting up a private meeting? 

The wretched feeling of his gut knotting did little to quell his growing frustration. He had everything to lose. Whatever it was that Erwin had in mind, he would have no choice but to play along. This man held the key to dropping or continuing this claim, and until this man saw fit to do so, he held Eren and his future in the palm of his hand. 

Smith had absorbed knowledge he never would have thought he could procure. Had it been any average fattened up donut muncher, they wouldn’t have a worry in the world. But this man… 

He dug deep, found hints and clues. He was sharp and cunning; troublesome. No one else would have read into their past following a lame phone call of accusation from a teenager. But for whatever reason, intuition or whatever bullshit that led him to look further into it, this man covered all his bases and then some.

Staring down at the crumbled card digging into his hand, he felt the pointed edges biting into his fingers and skin. With a deep sigh, he closed his eyes and tried to will his stammering heart to settle down. He would have to deal with Erwin another time.

As it were, the man was obviously in no rush to pursue them; reveal them; whatever the case may be. He had an ulterior motive, one Levi couldn’t quite pin down. But dwelling on it would do little good for him. For now, he just had to wait it out. Eren and he were safe for now, that’s all that mattered, and no matter what happens, he would keep it that way.

“Leevi…”

Eren’s voice is soft and questioning. The endearing twist on his name setting ease into his tense shoulders. Just his voice, the sweet sound that could lick any wound, allowed him to set aside his worries from the forefront of his mind. 

“Leevi, are you ok…? What did he say?” 

Levi let out a shallow breath. It wouldn’t be wise, not with all the stress Eren was under and how delicate his escalating and declining moods were over such a short period of time, to tell Eren about the final exchange with Erwin. He didn’t want him to worry, he didn’t want him to know their little act was so easily seen through. He didn’t want him to be angry or frustrated; he just wanted Eren, sweet, beautiful Eren, to remain at his side in ignorant bliss.

“Nothing to worry about.” 

His answer was curt, not wanting Eren to pry any further. Pushing himself from the wall, he stepped closer to Eren, drawing the teen to his body with his left arm as the fingers of his right gently glided over the marks left on his cheek. Levi nuzzled Eren’s neck, pushing up on his toes to do so as he sniffed at his skin.

“You’re a mess and you reek.” 

Eren could only chuckle, his emotions evening out as he relaxed against Levi.

“You should see Jean.” 

Levi grunted, “If he’s not sporting at least three times the bruises and cuts, I have no problem remedying that myself.” 

Eren soothed his back with his fingers. The tips trailing up and down the center column of his back, before gradually moving low enough to lift his shirt and begin dragging his nails lightly over skin. There’s a subtle hesitation, a faltering, in Eren’s hand. His wrist pausing so briefly it could be mistaken for being lazy, but Levi knew better. He knew, with the earlier conversation, that something was bothering him.

The reason his hand would twitch, as if to stop but resume moving almost immediately… There was a question on his mind. A thought he needed to speak aloud. He was curious, and justifiably so. If Levi had to guess, he’d say the only reason he wasn’t asking is simply, Eren, not wanting to upset him. 

There had never been a reason to tell Eren about his father. There was never a need to. They had each other, and all else before then, at least to Levi, didn’t matter. 

He wondered if Eren thought the same thing. Wondered, if he thought slating his curiosity was important at all. It had been years, so many years, since Eren showed any interest in the past. Not since he was just a little tike. Not since Levi had to put the boy into day care in order to make money. It was painful remembering how confused and lost Eren’s eyes were. Large hazel eyes and tiny pouting lips, his brows worried as he busied his hands together, trying to find a way to ask his ‘Big Brother’ why he didn’t have a mommy like all the other children. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Levi walked toward the day care, keeping to the right of the sidewalk to avoid people walking in the opposite direction as humanly possible. It had been a rather rough day, money was coming in slow, and anytime he had a chance he would busy himself with his studies. On his break, he would try to memorize as many formulas as possible. Syntax was one thing, but the physics and mathematics that went alongside programming were proving to be difficult. Never the less, he was determined to nail it down. Maybe do some freelance or work for a company or hell, why not both? 

It didn’t matter. All that mattered was getting Eren into a safe, and constructive environment; giving him a warm happy home, one that Levi never had for himself. No, he would have it, in a way, he would have this dream with Eren. 

Rubbing the knot out of the back of his neck, he yawned as he reached the cheesy glass door decorated with painted hand prints and block letters. With a jingle of the bells above alerting to his arrival, he stepped over to the reception desk to pick up Eren. 

He was a little excited, to be honest. He had managed to scrape together a small sum of extra cash, and decided to treat Eren to pizza. It wasn’t that they didn’t eat well, but since losing the food stamps, child support, and his dad’s unemployment checks, they hadn’t really been able to treat themselves either. Levi worked day in and day out, between studies, work, and taking care of Eren. He was exhausted, and it showed in the way his eyes began to sink and shadow with a light tinge of blue, far too quickly for his still young age. But it was worth it, and it would be worth it, so long as it was for Eren. 

“Leevi!” 

A bubbly shout drew his attention from the sign out sheet as the little boy wrapped his small arms around his leg, burying his face into the side of his thigh and nuzzling it. With a softening of his tired features, Levi ruffled the hair on his head before bending sideways and reaching down to move his hands under Eren’s armpits to lift him up. 

“I missed-ed you Leevi.” 

Eren sighed happily as he wound his arms around his neck. A soft chuckle leaving his lips as he agreed.

“I missed you too brat.” 

Nodding with a slight wave to the receptionist, he made his leave, Eren still firmly attached to his side and neck. This kid, honestly, he was too damn cute. 

“Want to ride on my shoulders? You’re getting too damn big to hang on my side like this kid.” 

Eren gasped and nodded eagerly. His head jutting up to look at Levi. 

“Yeah! I wanna be high up like Leevi!” 

Levi just rolled his eyes and with a quick ‘here we go’ bowed his head and shifted Eren over his neck to sit on his shoulders. Firmly, but not roughly, gripping Eren’s shins to hold him in place, so as not to let him fall, they continued on their way home. 

A couple blocks down and Levi was surprised at how quiet Eren was being. Only a few minutes after he had been boosted on his shoulders, he had quieted down. Levi felt the kid drape his little arms on either side of his head, one mindlessly playing at the under shave near his neck, while his little head rested on his own. 

“Oi, Eren?”

“Hm?”

He didn’t quite sound drowsy, but there was something off about the little boys tone. 

“Something bothering you kid?” 

Eren remains silent, slim short fingers busying themselves with his hairline with a barely second long pause in odd intervals. He’s thinking, trying to figure out how to form his question or what he needs to say. Levi stops his steps and waits patiently, tapping his own fingers on Eren’s shin when the boy chooses not to speak up.

“You can tell me Eren. What’s wrong?” 

“Leevi… is… my big brother right?” 

A little lost as to where this was going, “If that’s how you see me, yes.”

Eren’s fingers grip at the tiny hairs, and it kind of hurts, but Levi doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t want to deter Eren from speaking his mind, but Christ, what an awful habit. At least it wasn’t Eren’s own hair. Levi spent too much damn time scrubbing and conditioning, hell even doing oil treatments when he had the spare cash to pick up a tube at Sally’s beauty supply, for the brunette to go and pull at his own hair and ruin his efforts. Maybe it was odd, but Levi prided himself with how soft and healthy Eren’s hair was, and generally, his overall cleanliness. 

He couldn’t see the furrow of Eren’s brows as the boy thought hard on his next words, but he could envision it easily. No matter how many times Levi warned him that little crease would become permanent one day if he kept folding his brow like that, Eren couldn’t help by make that face when he concentrated. 

“But… I don’t have a mama or papa…” 

Levi sighed, biting down on the inside corner of his lip harshly for the brief second he thought he’d let out a curse. He wasn’t expecting that at all. 

Reaching back, he lifted the boy up and over his head, setting him down and crouching in to his height, turning the boy to face him. 

“Everyone has a mama and papa Eren, but sometimes… sometimes they don’t meet them. Something may happen, and sometimes mama’s and papa’s can’t take care of their children.” 

He could see Eren’s face falling with each word and Levi didn’t have it in his heart to butter over the details any more than he had. It wouldn’t be fair to Eren to lie. Some lessons or facts in life just couldn’t be avoided. He just hoped he would be able to deal the blow in an easier way for Eren. 

With a gentle nudge of his knuckles against the bottom of Eren’s chin, Levi offered a small smile, “Chin up kid, it isn’t so bad is it? If you were with your mama and papa then I would never have met you.” 

Eren’s eyes went wide in horror, jumping forward to grasp Levi’s hand, “I don’t want that. I don’t want a mama or a papa if it means I can’t be with Leevi!” 

He could feel his heart squeeze in his chest, a more genuine smile working to his lips as he enveloped Eren in his arms. 

“Shhhh, no need to get excited. You’re with me aren’t you? So none of that matters.” 

“So I can stay with Leevi forever?” 

“As long as you want, but you know,” he teased, “forever is a long time.” 

Eren sounded determined as he grasped his cheeks and stood back to glare in his eyes. It wasn’t very intimidating as, he knew, Eren wished it could be. 

“No, Leevi! You have to promise for forever! Ok?” 

Levi caught Eren’s pinky with his own and linked them together, “It’s a promise, now… How about some pizza?” 

Eren’s eyes lit up, “Really!? With extra cheese! Lots and lots and lotsa cheese!” 

Levi laughed, holding Eren’s hand in his as they started back up on walking home. 

“Sure, sure.” 

“And stuffed crust!” 

Levi sighed, pretending to be annoyed, “Are you sure you want pizza or just a block of cheese?” 

Eren let out his best smile, followed with an exaggerated ‘Hee-Hee’, as he looked up to Levi, swinging their hands together as they strolled along. 

A few steps later and Eren kicked at the ground every so often, trying to get at the loose woodchips from the planted squares lining the sidewalks in the area. 

“Hey, Leevi?” 

“Hm?”

“Did you ever meet them?”  
The raven frowned as he looked down to big hopeful eyes and softly breathed out a response, “Yeah. I met your mom once.” 

“You did?! What did she look like?” 

He couldn’t tell him he didn’t see her. He couldn’t tell him he never actually met her, only heard her abandoning her son with tears and apologies on his lips. He couldn’t just come out and say all that. Not to Eren. Not to the doe eyed little brat looking up at him so expectantly, waiting for Levi to hand him the world as he saw fit. 

“She was beautiful,” he forced a small smile through his lie, “She had hair and eyes just like yours. Green like moss and hints of sunlight, and a head full of soft brown hair, just like yours. She told me to take good care of you for her.” 

Eren smiled in awe, “Woooooow, really? Haha, Leevi, does that mean you think I’m beaaaauuuutiful too?”

Levi rolled his eyes, “Don’t get too cocky kid.” 

Leave it to Eren to come up with such a response.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

His hands kept pausing and resuming on his spine.

“Eren, what’s wrong?” 

With a sigh the brunette admitted softly.

“I don’t want to ask if it’ll upset you…”

“Don’t coddle me like I’m the brat in this situation, what do you want to know?”

Eren frowned at him, though he really wasn’t upset at the spiteful remark. 

“What happened with your dad… I mean… you never told me about him.” 

Levi frowned but gave in to the inevitable, “There’s not much to tell. He was a dead beat dad. He ran off once the support checks ran out.” 

“… Wouldn’t I remember him then?” 

Levi shook his head and walked towards the bathroom, “I don’t see how you could. You were what? Three? Can you even recall how many times you wet the bed at that age?” 

“Leevi!”

Eren gasped, “T-That’s gross! Why would you even mention that? I was little! I couldn’t help it!” 

Levi waved his hand as he let Eren go and headed toward the bathroom, “Right, right. Relax. Just a humble reminder that you’re soiled and you need a bath brat.”

Eren huffed but followed him without putting a fight. It was odd though. Even now, Levi seemed to be avoiding the subject. Granted, it was something he was obviously bitter about, and Eren couldn’t blame him for that, but he was still left to wonder. He wanted to know, the good and the bad, of Levi’s past; of a life before he was in it. Why Levi took him in, and why he kept him despite the hardships when he held no real obligation to do so. 

But these were not questions for tonight. They were both worn down, he knew. They needed time to distract themselves from the details. There was no reason to dig up fresh dirt so soon. 

Eren watched as Levi filled the tub, checking the water for temperature every so often till he was satisfied. In the meantime, Eren stripped off his clothing, hissing as he pulled the shirt over his head. The pull against a particular bruise on his side, which he figured happened when Jean and he hit the pavement, caused an uncomfortable throbbing pain. 

Levi looked over at the sound. Eren offering a small apologetic smile.

“It’s nothing really, just a bruise from when I hit the ground I guess. It’s kind of my fault anyway, I lunged at him.”

Levi didn’t look very convinced, but didn’t push the questions any further than the bite his lip suffered as it pulled it between his teeth. 

“They don’t deserve to have you defending their actions,” Levi gestured for him to hurry up, “Come on, you don’t want to waste hot water do you?” 

Eren shuffled out of the remainder of his clothes and did as he was told. Stepping in a toe at a time and slowly seating himself into the water with a few gasps and heavy breaths. Levi could only chuckle.

“It’s not ‘that’ hot.” 

Eren blinked a couple times, eyelashes fluttering with the motion, as he adjusted to the water’s temperature, slightly confused at Levi’s fully dressed state. 

“You’re not taking a bath?” 

Levi shook his head, “I’m not really in the mood for a bath.” 

An eyebrow raised far enough that you could argue it disappeared somewhere into Eren’s scalp. 

“You…. Of all people. Don’t want a bath,” Eren asked slowly, “You don’t want to wash up? Or get clean?” 

The brunette’s hand fumbled for the soap, eyes never leaving Levi’s as his hand clumsily felt around the tub for the bar. Finally grasping it, Eren dipped it into the water and brought it in between them. Swiping the side with his index to produce suds, he wiggled his eye brows.

“Soap Levi, sooooooooap.”

“Stop that,” Levi bopped him on the nose with a flick of his index, which led Eren to expel a yelp and cover his noise protectively. 

“That was mean!” 

“So was your gross fingering session with the soap,” Levi moved to stand but Eren’s hand shot out before he had a chance to do so. 

Catching him by the fabric of his loose sweatpants, his fingers wound into the material. He didn’t know exactly what he wanted to say, let alone how to say it. But he knew, all he wanted was to keep Levi close. Between the fight between Jean and himself and the downfall over the only friendships he ever held dear, he needed him. 

Selfish or not. Eren just wanted him close. He needed the casual banter, the teasing that accompanied the smiles, chuckles and the soft laughter meant only for him. He felt horrible; terrible for turning on his friends as they had turned on him. When he spoke to Erwin, he was caught between a vengeful, eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth, outlook and one of reluctance. Now more than ever, he needed Levi close to him. He needed his comfort and his warmth. He needed to erase the events of the day and mask them behind the only thing that ever truly made sense. 

Levi.

“Don’t you want to eat when you’re done washing up? I haven’t started anything yet.” 

In light of their earlier company, Levi had slipped on a white cotton shirt. With his hand still tugging on his sweatpants, more than likely Eren’s by the way they dragged low on his hips, an impish smile crossed his lips. 

Now that he really thought about it, a blush made its way to his cheeks. Before all this madness transpired, they were waking up together, wrapped in each other’s arms. And while the thought may have been inappropriate, considering all that just happened, he couldn’t help but allow it to wander. 

They had ‘sex’ for the first time. Something, Eren’s wildest fantasies, never dreamed would happen just a couple years ago. 

It didn’t even seem that far away. He couldn’t really remember when his thoughts had shifted from platonic to romantic. All he could remember were the confusing nights, lying close to the man he called his big brother for so many years, thinking about the way he smelt, the warmth of his body, the soft sound of his breathing, the arch of his neck and the way his hair messily decorated the pillow. He could remember trying to fight the urge to touch himself as they overtook his reason. 

The way his hand begged to bring him some sort of relief from the taunt pressure between his heated thighs. How he would give in, caving to the desire to be touched, and his mind wished, oh so badly wished, it were Levi touching him in his place. That thought alone leaving the release of air from his lungs, Levi’s name off his lips, and hot fluid seeping between his fingers. 

“I’m not hungry,” with a show of a tug, threatening to drop the loose fabric that barely clung to his body, “Take a bath with me Leevi.” 

The almost whine made Levi roll his eyes, but he complied in contrast to his annoyed gesture. Kneeling down next to the tub, Levi tilted Eren, by the chin, to face him. 

“Inconsiderate brat,” Levi spat out with no true malice behind his words, “What if I was hungry?” 

Whether or not it was intended, Eren heard the insinuation behind that seemingly innocent sentence. Hell, perhaps he really was just hungry, but with the brunette’s mind getting further distracted by numerous underlying meanings, there wasn’t a hope in sight that he’d interpret it as it were. 

That smirk wormed its way back to his lips, and Levi was too distracted by his wandering eyes to notice it properly. 

“Leevi…” 

The name was whispered to draw his attention. His eyes scanning up the nude body, misaligning his torso in a strange illusion as the water separated from air, to the source of the sound. Before he had a chance to even utter a word, Eren’s mouth claimed his. As their lips moved over each other, mouth parting to implore Levi to come closer. 

When Levi leaned in to take the bait, Eren clasped his hand around Levi’s forearm, the one of which supported his weight against the tub, and grabbed the back of his thigh. With a wicked giggle against his lips, Eren yanked Levi over the tub; not nearly as smoothly as he would have imagined though. 

Levi nearly let out a shout but was cut off with a hiss as his hip bumped the porcelain tub as he was pulled in at the odd angle. Tears from the laughter, Eren apologized as Levi cursed. He couldn’t make out the disgruntled words, nothing other than catching glimpses of the word, ‘Hell’, ‘ fuck’, ‘dammit’, ‘Jesus Christ’, and ‘brat’.

As the laughter died off, Eren tenderly caressed the now bruising skin on his hip. He hadn’t meant to hurt him, but he couldn’t help his laughter at the shocked expression that crossed Levi’s features.

“I’ve never seen your eyes so big before,” Eren wiped at his own eyes, “Ah, I’m sorry, that was just… Too good. Your face was perfect. How’s you hip?” 

Levi mustered up the best glare he could, and was surprised as Eren cheeks puffed out before he fell back into a fit of laughter once more.

“What the hell is so funny?” 

The tone was sharp, but he wasn’t entirely that pissed. Upset that he was wet and fully clothed, yes. Upset that his floor was now a mere flood, sure. Upset, simply upset. 

“You look like a drowned cat!” 

Levi grunted, pushing himself up and his other hand doing him a favor of pushing the mop of hair covering half his face back. Eren watched as he adjusted himself to stand his weight on his knees and left arm, the right dropping to the brunette’s hip to give it a firm squeeze.

“Watch it, I’ll be tempted to drown you kid.” 

Eren’s features softened, the mirth still present in his eyes but the crinkle of skin around them and his pink cheeks relaxing. 

“No you wouldn’t.” 

Levi came closer and blew a puff of air towards his eyes, “I said I was tempted.” 

“Hmm…” 

The teen couldn’t really find it in himself to pay attention to their banter. His eyes a bit preoccupied in wonder at the man in front of him. Seconds ago, he was hysterical in laughter with Levi looking like a feline who slipped into a shower, but now… Whatever kind of black magic transformed the hilarity in front of his eyes into the image before him, he prayed it was an ever long lasting spell. 

The white cotton formed to each contour of his craned back. The flesh beneath where the fabric clung transparent enough to see through to the nude flesh. Wrinkles of white fabric rippled over his chest and hung high around his waist, he presumed, it rode up when he pulled in him. And while the cotton material of his sweats keep hidden the flesh tone under it, it dragged even lower on his hip, barely held on as the remaining clung to his thighs. 

“- even hear a word I just said?” 

“Huh?”

Green eyes shot back up, focusing on the amused grin set across Levi’s lips.  
“Thought so…”

Levi sighed, but the grin never left his face. Instead, he smoothed his hand, under the water, to glide up Eren’s thigh. His point curling at the base of Eren’s erect cock and pulling it back just enough that it snapped back, tapping the teen’s abdomen. 

“I bet you didn’t even realize this guy has been trying to get out of the water.” 

With Levi now mentioning it, he did feel the draft of air against the head of his heated flesh, the rest, still covered by the warm water, hot in contrast of the cool temperature above. The raven’s fingers uncurled around the base and straightened their path up the center line of his abdomen. The gentle touch working its way up to his neck, and to his bottom lip, where he dragged it down to expose the gum at the base of his lower front teeth.

“I thought you said you weren’t hungry?” 

Eren felt his cheeks burn. Regardless of the fact that they did explore each other’s bodies, Eren more so than Levi, but still, did little to quell his embarrassment. If anything, he blushed harder knowing where it could possibly lead. 

Levi watched the shades of pink and red dust the boy’s features. His body even blushing, not solely from him but more than likely, alongside the warm water that surrounded them. When his fingers brushed his skin, he felt its soft appeal. Wanting to do nothing more than roam his hands to caresses every inch and assimilate every detail. It was sublime, the way each dip and curve, each flow of tone muscle, not soft nor hard, smooth yet with minor imperfections, captivated him time and time again. He could never grow tired of his hands examining the body of the teen beneath him. 

A darker craving, one he felt the night before but forfeited in favor of erasing his own past, left him on the border of no return. He wanted to touch and feel and taste everything. Every inch, every part of Eren’s body. He wanted what he was so afraid to grasp. He wanted to feel what he could not, more so than ever, from the night prior. He wanted to taste him, feel him, touch him, inside of him.  
He wanted to know what it was like. He wanted to feel it. Desperately. He needed it even. But how could he? Could he really take something such as this from Eren? If Eren were to allow it, was it really ok? Did he really, could he, rather, know what he was consenting? 

For now, just for now, maybe it was ok to touch and to taste. Just a taste, just to feel with his tongue and fingers. Just that. Only that, that would be ok, wouldn’t it?

“Eren,” Levi’s voice dipped lower, unconscious of how husky the tone had become. 

His hands slipped to Eren’s hips where he gently rubbed circles with his the pads of his thumb. With his full attention, Levi watched carefully, wanting to detect any hesitation if there were to be any. He wanted to be careful, to make the right decision. He didn’t want Eren to feel forced, he needed to be completely comfortable. He needed to want this as much as he. 

“Do you trust me?” 

Eren’s brows had pulled down in confusion, not so much so to cause a crease, but enough to begin to push the hood of his eye along with it. And though the confusion crossed his eyes, there was no delay in his words.

“Of course I do Leevi.” 

He worried the bottom of his lip between his teeth. A delay in the inevitable decision he knew he would make. He knew he was fighting a losing battle, after all, it was only play wasn’t it? And as eager as he was to divulge, he was equally as feverent to feel Eren’s warmth pulsing inside of him. He wanted to be filled, but he also wanted to experience of filling, and he wanted Eren to be the one that gave him that. To give him something he never had, much like he did as they joined before. 

He wanted to be made love to, and he wanted to give that same love, to no one else but Eren. 

“Turn over…,” Levi commanded, as he helped lift Eren’s hips, turning them into position.  
“Hold onto the edge of the tub.” 

Eren did so with shaking fingers, though not from fear. The sensual husk of Levi’s voice left him nothing but eager anticipation. For what Levi might do, to what he could do, with having him in such a vulnerable position. 

“Eren,” Levi asked as he juggled the bar of soap in his right hand, the left still resting on Eren’s hip as the water dripped to hit the pool in the tub below. 

“Yes?” 

The air cooled his heated skin, forced a shiver through his form, his mind still wandering to the possibilities. 

“Is this Ok,” Levi asked as he released the soap from his hand and ghosted the soapy digit of his pointer along the puckered skin, “I won’t take this any farther than you’re comfortable with.” 

Eren let out a nearly quiet gasp and shook his head. He was undoubtedly curious. He wanted to know how Levi felt, how he made Levi feel. He wanted to share that with him all the same and experience it again. He trusted Levi, and he would dare to say, he’d be willing to give the man anything he may desire within reason. 

This was reasonable. No, rather, this was desirable. 

“I-I want to know,” Eren stuttered out, the thought of what was going to occur quickening the pace of his heart, “Show me… I want you to show me Leevi, please.” 

Levi felt a chill run down his spine. A lingering warmth budding under the cold wet cotton that still pressed around the hardening flesh. This position, his thoughts and the sound Eren’s voice, enough to stir him up. He licked his lips, as he bent forward, lightly kissing where just under Eren’s ass where it met his thigh. 

When Eren jerked forward with another gasp before settling back, it encouraged him to drag the tip of his tongue along the area. His mouth littering the sensitive flesh with open and closed kisses, tongue teasing along his thigh and cheek every so often.

With the distraction, he swirled his pointer around the hole. Drawing a circle around toward the center then back out, enjoying how impatient Eren was becoming when he came close to the entrance. Whenever he drew near, Eren would shift his hips, in such a way, as to try to accept him inside. 

Grey eyes full of mischievous glee as they watched Eren’s hands tense around the rim of the tub, as his hips would push back into his hand, mouth, and tongue. 

“You’re really curious aren’t you?” 

Eren nodded his head quickly with a strained whine trapped in his throat. The teasing was nearly driving him crazy, he just wanted to feel more. The skin, that received so much attention, could no longer defend his body against the short gasping breaths and impatient groans. He wanted more. He wanted to feel it, he wanted Levi to show him what it felt like; thoroughly, intimately, through every fiber of his being he wanted to possess everything Levi had to offer. 

“So am I,” The breath came at the small of his back, just at the base of his spine. Levi eased the very tip of his finger in just a tiny ways, careful, agonizingly slow for Eren and cautious. Just barely breaching him, the finger made slow, delicate circles, gradually working its way deeper as he nipped and kissed up Eren’s spine. 

“I-I can’t,” Levi paused as Eren muttered, his voice heated. The sound of the strain scaring him enough to freeze, afraid he might have not been careful enough. He knew the pace was slow, but he wanted Eren to enjoy every second of it, from start to finish. He didn’t want to cause the boy any pain, only pure, undiluted pleasure.

“-S’not curious enough,” Eren grunted as he forced his body back completely surrounding the soapy finger. 

With an awkward shift, Eren placed his head down on the rim of the cold porcelain that his hands gripped. With a heave of his chest at the odd intrusion, he tried to come up with a way to describe how it felt. It hadn’t hurt, it was strange though. He wondered if this was how it always felt, but that couldn’t be. Not with the way Levi’s body has responded. There had to be more to it than just this. 

The finger inside him curled as a second rubbed just below, middle finger playing with the area of skin just bordering his testicles. Eren moaned, the intrusion becoming less of a discomfort with the attention. 

“There’s a reason for taking my time, don’t be so selfish.”

The warm air that expelled from Levi’s lips and the drag of, now cold, cotton fabric meeting his skin, indicated his movement up his body. His fingers rotating as his arm shifted with him. The middle drawing away to linger near the plunged index that slowly began moving an inch back and forward. Subtle as it were, the speed allowed him to feel the digit penetrating him from the fingertip to the point it left him at the knuckle. 

Levi let his lips trail along Eren’s neck, nipping at the nape as he carefully pressed his body against his own. Eren nearly jumped beneath him. The fabric’s temperature a stark contrast against how hot his skin felt. 

“I want to feel you moaning beneath me. I want to make your legs shake and your throat go raw from screaming my name,” Levi bite down on the nape of Eren’s neck and gave it a lap of his tongue to sooth it, “I want to make pleasure the only thing you feel, so be patient Eren.” 

With a soft chuckle he nuzzled his neck, kissing around the shell of his ear till his lips met his lobe. With a kiss to the junction between his ear and cheek bone, Levi whispered through his amusement.

“Can you be a good boy and do that for me, Eren.”  
The way his name rolled off his tongue, nearly made Eren lose his grip. It was both exhilarating and infuriating how easily he could be teased by him. Every word, every touch, everything he did to his body, drove him to the edge. His body not ready to release but his the mental euphoria of what Levi could do to him, beyond just the physical, was like teetering on an orgasm. 

A cry ripped from his throat, louder than he thought possible, when the invading digit curled in such a way, blowing away the other stimuli in an instant. His body shook, nearly going limp as his hips bucked backwards in search of the bizarre feeling once more. 

“W-wha… was that..?” 

Levi could only smile, the corner of his lips pulling ear to ear, “Perhaps we don’t need to be so patient, huh, Eren?” 

Levi focused on alternating the stroke of his finger. Every time he brushed up against that area, his middle would inch closer, push deeper, and eventually, begin to work alongside his index. He stretched him, scissoring his fingers in such a way that allowed him to hit Eren’s prostate to distract him from any irritation. 

Sitting back on his heels, Levi watched his fingers disappear and reappear from the tight, puckered muscle. Licking his lips, he forced his fingers apart, as much as comfort would allow, and used his other hand to rinse the soap suds built up around it, and hopefully, inside of it with the bath water. Squelches sounded, as he angled and turned his fingers, trying his best to rid the boy of lingering soap. 

When he was satisfied, he gingerly extracted his fingers, moving his hands to massage Eren’s cheeks. As he kneaded the globes in his hands, Eren’s heavy breathing coming back down, save for the small moans that continued to release through his lips, Levi swiped his tongue across his lips, dragging his top teeth over his bottom lip. 

“I want to taste you….” 

It was more of a statement to himself than to Eren, but the abrupt turn of Eren’s head to face him made him glad he said so aloud. 

“Leevi, what do yo… ahhh…!” 

Pulling his ass to either aside, he dragged his tongue as close to his testicles as possible, and back up to swirl around the loosened ring of muscle. His skin was clean; fresh. No strong favor to be held on his tongue, but just enough of a taste to know this is what Eren was like. 

Ignoring Eren’s confused babble, because maybe this was uncharacteristic of him. He was, after all, strict in what was dirty and what was clean. But none of that mattered as he drove his tongue as far as he could to re-wet the taunt skin. Eren nearly collapsed against his own weight, but Levi caught him around the base of his hips. 

The tremors and quivering limbs of the boy wrapped in his arms and the clean scent enrapturing his sense of smell, strained him against his own boxers. The desire to take him, all of him, becoming dangerous for him. He didn’t want to take his innocence away, not this soon, but his body wouldn’t agree with his brain. He knew, ultimately, the decision lie with Eren. If he refused he wouldn’t push, but if he was left to want, he wasn’t sure he could refuse him anymore. Not with the muscles flexing around his tongue and against his lips. Not against the tensing abdomen brushed his arm with every heavy breath of air that expanded and contracted in the boy’s lungs. 

He wouldn’t be able to refuse him. He wouldn’t. 

Pulling back to kiss up to the base of his spine, Levi wound his arm around to grab Eren’s swollen length. With a lack of lube, and the dry properties of the water, he knew better than to stroke him in long strides. Short, at the base; shallow with inconsistent changes in pressure. Pulling Eren back along with him, he sat back on his heels once more, bring Eren to sit on his lap.

He couldn’t help but to grind his hips up as he continued to fondle him. His lips no longer reaching his neck, he settled on kissing and nipping at his shoulder blades and sides. Even his arms at times.  
He was losing himself, he knew it. Every lick, every kiss, every touch. He was waning what control he had. Any thought of Eren ever being taken away from him gone. It wasn’t an option, he wouldn’t allow it. No matter what. Eren was his. 

Eren’s moans were his. Eren’s body was his. Eren’s lips, Eren’s eyes, Eren’s heart, Eren’s lungs; they breathed with him, for him. Eren was to live for him. It all seemed so rational, so right. Anything and everything that he is, Eren’s, exclusively, and anything and everything Eren is, his and his alone.

“L-Levi… I-I… don’t… ah… I don’t want to cum like this..” 

“Oh? You dropped that little pet name, you must have ‘some’ request then.” 

Giving him a small twist as his opposite hand moved to play with his balls, he continued.

“Tell me then, Eren. Tell me how to make you cum,” he whispered, licking up the base of his spine to bite as close to his nape as possible, “I’ll do anything you’d like, you just have to tell me, Eren.” 

“I-I want to feel…I want to feel what Levi felt… Levi, please…” 

Levi knew what the boy was hinting toward, but he wanted to confirm. For his peace of mind, needed to confirm, before he lost his sense entirely and ravished the boy grounding down against his upward thrusts.

“You’ll have to be more specific brat,” Levi mumbled impatiently, hissing as the friction made him feel even harder. 

The idea of entering Eren. Of taking him, all of him. Of his cock melding inside of him. Of his breath heavy and short, alongside Eren’s as he pushed deeper, took him in longer strides. Every inch, connecting like the sounds of their slapping skin. To take him the way he gave himself to Eren. 

From himself, to Eren and from Eren to himself; together; equal.  
“I want to feel what it’s like… inside… I want Leevi inside me! Please Levi, please Leevi, please.”

With that, that admission was all it took, he came undone. Turning Eren over as they stood, Levi carefully extracted him from the tub. Stepping out onto the tile, not even thinking of giving a second glance to the left they’d leave behind, he hoisted Eren’s legs around his hips. Balancing as he walked, he stepped on the edge of his sweatpants, pulling his legs out as best he could as he took each step. Stepping further up on more of the fabric till he was able to rid himself of it entirely. 

Each step felt tedious as he moved to their bedroom. Lips meeting and tongues clashing, as they moved from the hallway to the room. Levi approached the side of the bed, next to their nightstand. Gently placing Eren’s body down on the bed sheets as he gave himself his left hand to pull at the cotton that clung to him still. 

Eren aided his efforts, and once the fabric was peeled off his skin and over his head, he tossed it carelessly to the side. His lips immediately diving forward to devour the teen below him. Each kiss was gentle, but urgent. An odd push and pull so close to being rough but sometimes light enough it could be mistaken for the brush of a feather. 

Reaching back with his right to open the drawer and extract the lube, Levi trailed his lips down. His right arm pulling Eren’s ass to the end of the bed as Levi sunk the hot length into his mouth. He felt Eren’s fingers coil in his hair, a moaning shout of surprise reaching his ears and he sucked completely down to the base, ignoring the burn of his throat. 

Trying to keep his pace even as best he could, he popped open the cap and squirt a liberal amount of lube over his own straining erection. Coating himself evenly, he squirt more into his hand, rubbing his fingers into his palm to get his fingers coated even as well. Reaching back up, and tugging Eren even closer to the edge, he easily slide two slick digits back into his body. 

As he worked his fingers, making sure to cover every inch inside, his felt the hand in his hair trying to tug him back.

“L-Levi!! S-Stop! I.. I’m gonna cum!” 

With a pop, Levi released his mouth off the head of his cock, kissing the tip as pre-cum oozed from it. A groan and gentle sigh left Eren’s throat, a combination of loss at the feeling, and relief that he didn’t cum right away. The fingers followed suit, withdrawing from him as Levi stood. 

The height of the bed was almost perfect, he only needed a single pillow to prop Eren’s hips a tad bit higher to line up perfectly with his hips. With a quick pump to his own length, he lined himself to Eren, setting his other hand down on Eren’s thigh to knead it gently.

“Eren.. Is this really what you want… I can’t promise I can stop if we..” 

“Levi,” Eren forced himself to sit up, left arm bent to hold him up at the elbow while the right reached to cup Levi’s jaw before trailing down his neck, chest, abs, and finally to rest over Levi’s hand that held the his erection against him, “Didn’t I say I trust you?” 

“It will hurt at first, you have to be patient. Go slow at first, but it’ll feel good. I’ll make you feel good Eren.”

Levi met his lips without a second’s hesitation, his hips pushing forward at a prolonged pace. Every inch, he would draw back before pushing forward again. Attentively easing himself in, as he stroked Eren, kissing and whispering endearing words of encouragement as he moved closer and closer to filling him completely. 

Eren’s chest rose and fell unevenly. Gasps and moans, hisses and pants. He trusted Levi’s word. He would make it feel good. He proved, that with his fingers alone, he could make him feel things he could never imagine, but this? This feeling of being stretched, no matter how cautious no matter how heedful, still ached in a way he never felt before. Still, making him feel strange, not entirely unpleasant but not exactly gratifying either. But he remembered the way Levi’s face contorted in ecstasy, and even now, the way Levi’s brow folded high, lips parted ever so slightly, and eyes, barely open as he peered down… 

He looked beautiful. Happy and content despite the concern. And every time he felt himself contract against the length burying itself inside him, he watched, heard, as a moan would slip past his lips and the muscles in his arm would twitch; fingers gripping just slightly harder against his skin. 

Slow. Slow. Slow, every motion of his hips steady. In and out, till every inch was seated to the hilt. Every inch pulling out to the tip and pushing back in. No matter how much time passed, no matter how many times Levi drove his hips forward. He moved at an agonizing pace. Eren shuddered under him, legs shaking as needy moans and whimpers left his lips.

The gradual build up, like a winding coil, kept him close enough to nearly tangible relief, but far enough so he couldn’t completely achieve it. Levi felt Eren wiggle his hips, trying desperately to set a faster rhythm. 

The vision that lay before Levi, of Eren breathless, fine damp strands along his hair line clinging to his forehead, face contorted by pleasure, yearning for him, body arched as the hips, within his hands, fought to move against him; searching for more friction. 

For his first time, Levi never could have imagined he would respond so well. For himself as well, he longed to take quick, short and shallow thrusts, pushing himself deeper and harder into the constricting heat that surrounded him. Longed to watch Eren’s body bounce as his hips met the bottom of the brunette’s firm ass with a resounding smack. Wanted to hear him scream out his name as he drove the head of his cock against that hidden trigger of pleasure inside him. He wanted to bite down on tender flesh, mark him, take him, and love him entirely; not leaving a solitary inch of him unclaimed. When he came, he wanted to taste the saltiness of his cum decorating his stomach and chest in a sheen glistening reminder of what he made Eren feel. 

Anyone would crumble with the sight of Eren, wanton and lustful as he was now. He couldn’t help the thought, but delighted in knowing he was the only one that would see it. The only one that could keep Eren in this limbo of aching pleasure. The only one to hear his breath hitch as he rocked his hips. The only to hear the sound of Eren’s voice so far gone. The imperfections, the bruises and cuts from earlier, did little to mar the perfection of what Eren showed him. 

He was the only one, he would be the only one. Eren was his. He would always be his. 

“L-Levi… So close... I’m so close…,” 

Long legs wrapped around his torso. Levi moved his hands to grab each cheek and pull him up, helping to bring his hips higher and bury himself as far as he could possibly go. He kept himself to the base, moving his hips in circular motions as they ground against each other. 

He watched as the brunette threw his head back with a low moan, fighting not to do the same himself. Enclosed around him, drawing him in, squeezing, warm and moist, delectable, he couldn’t get enough. 

Keeping his right hand in place to hold up Eren’s hips, he slid his left along his skin. He drew Eren’s leg along with it, straightening out his calf to rest the back of his foot against his shoulder. His lips found his skin, neck craning to kiss as far as he could reach over the muscle; eyes never leaving Eren’s. 

“A-ah, you feel good Eren,” Levi bent forward as he spoke, directing Eren’s leg back in its previous position as he kissed his forehead. 

His hand moving back over his leg to his hip and rounding to massage around the straining red organ, standing tall, twitching every so often as if desperately seeking attention by the teasing hand. 

“You feel absolutely perfect around me.” 

His voice baritone; deep and rich as each word flared a heated blush, spreading over Eren’s cheekbones and down through his body. He knew the words affected him that much more, his hand, just grazing the leaking erection as his fingers played in the course hairs that lie directly above. 

“You’re beautiful Eren, perfect. I love when moan my name; I want to hear it more. Moan for me Eren. Let me hear you.” 

He divulged from the restrained and gentle thrusts to pull his voice out more. Drawing back slowly, pushing back harder and grinding into him as each thrust met skin before repeating the process. Over and over, each moan heavier on Eren’s lips as Levi’s name became a mantra. 

Incoherent jumbled versions of his name mixed together between moans became a siren’s song to Levi’s ears. Eren’s body beginning to squeeze around him in quicker intervals, getting closer and closer to coming undone completely. 

He wanted to push him there. Pressing his cheek to Eren’s, he nuzzled closer to his ear, his pace finally picking up, as he knew, neither Eren nor he could withstand holding back any longer. 

“Ah-a..ah.. You’re getting tight. I can feel you squeezing me, Eren… ah… Eren, so good. You feel so good. I want to cum inside. I want to pull out after I fill you and watch it drip down your thighs. Will you show me such a lewd sight Eren? Will you cum with me?”  
The questions buzzed in Eren’s head, his body on fire, caught between embarrassment in the way Levi was speaking, and rapture at how Levi was making him feel. He nodded his head eagerly, not sure if he could form words. Eren’s hands, which had screwed up tightly in the fabric of their bed sheets, fumbled to break free of their entanglement to wrap around Levi’s neck. 

Levi’s hand abruptly stroked from the base to his head and rolled it around in his palm, wrapping his fingers around again to repeat the motion as his hips picked up more speed, nearing in on their fast approaching climax. 

Letting his teeth nip at Eren’s bottom lip, he caught the teen’s gaze. 

“S’no good Eren, let me hear you. Tell me you want to cum. I won’t let you till you tell me. Beg me for it Eren,” Levi made good on his promise as his hand stilled to squeeze at the base of Eren’s cock, holding back his impeding orgasm. 

The cry he gave out, caused a shiver to roll up the raven’s spine. He was glad to hear Eren immediately start stuttering aloud. To be honest, he didn’t think he could hold on much longer either, but he wanted to hear Eren shamelessly beg for it. He never planned for it to go this far, but now that they were here, he couldn’t stop himself for taking more. 

Greedily, he wanted every moan, every word, everything, everything and more. More. More. Just Eren. All of him, Eren.

“Eren…ah… fu—aahh Eren tell me. Tell me Eren.” 

As if a flood gate broke, Eren’s voice echoed in the room at his fevered pitch. 

“Lee-Leevi! C-cum! Make me cum! Cum inside, I want to feel it inside, Leevi, Levi…! Ah… I want to feel you cum inside me, please. Please! Levi!!”  
He lost himself as Eren stammered on. His hand moving over Eren as he couldn’t stop himself from losing his pace all together and mindlessly pounding his cock into Eren’s ass. Eren came first, with a near scream of his name, and he quickly follow with Eren’s name rolling off his tongue. 

It was amazing, feeling the pulse of his cock as it jet warm seed inside. Their bodies spent, over heated and tired. In a numbing sort of bliss where every breath felt like a mile and every touch tingled over every nerve. Tilting his head to look down, he noticed some of Eren’s cum had reached his chest and collar bone. 

If it were anyone else, he would find it disgusting, even if it were himself, he would feel dirty in a way that would leave him scrubbing away at his skin for hours on end, but on Eren…. The shining coat of near translucent fluid looked… inviting. 

Bending his neck down, he dragged his tongue over the splattered puddle, sucking on the bead left on his collar bone before sitting back up with a moan. 

Eren watched in awe, as Levi’s tongue swiped any remnants off his lip. Had he not just cum, he’s sure the image alone would cause him to erect immediately. He watched as Levi’s eyes followed down his body to where they were joined at their hips. If it were possible, he wanted to stay like this long, with Eren holding him inside, but he knew his waning length would be pushed out by the tight heat eventually, and besides… He was curious after all. Rolling his cock once last time before deciding to remove himself. 

Pulling back slowly, Levi watched as he pulled out. Fascinated as his cock left Eren and a bit of white and clear fluid flowed along with it. 

“So lewd,” Levi commented as he swiped his finger to pick up the cum, “Naa.. Eren, it’s still coming out. You took in so much didn’t you?” 

Eren spurted, cheeks still redder than he thought physically possible. They had to be on fire, literally on fire, the teen was sure of it. Any more of this teasing and he would spontaneously combust. 

“A-As if I could answer that,” he yelped, grabbing a pillow to cover his face. 

Levi tossed the pillow aside with a chuckle and pulled Eren’s hands away when he tried to cover his face, “You know, perhaps I do want a bath after all.” 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

The little boy splashed the surface of the water in a fit of giggles, looking back to see a disapproving look from the raven and only finding that much more amusement in it. He was tall for a kid his age, only six yet he stood close to four feet already.

Hormones, there were fucking mutant hormones in their food, he was convinced, that’s all there was to it. 

Edging closer, the smaller of the two reached up to tug on Levi’s cheeks, trying to force a smile.

“Leeeeeeeeeevi,” he whined, “I like it better when you smile! Your frown-y face is weird!” 

Levi batted his hands away gently, “I won’t smile if you’re idea of fun is messing up my floor brat.” 

Eren huffed, pressing his upper arms to his side and holding his palms to the air in an exasperated manner, “If I clean the floor will you smile?” 

Levi tried not to chuckle, “I suppose I would.” 

“So you’ll splash with me!!” 

“Don’t push it kid.” 

Eren only chuckled in good nature, knowing full well Levi would be hard pressed to start splashing along with him.

“Oooooo-k,” Eren sighed, but still held his smile. 

His lips puckered in thought, making popping sounds with a fish like expression, glancing off to the side as he rocked side to side.

“Heeeey, Leeevi?”

Levi rolled his eyes, but couldn’t help the small smile from forming. 

“Ah ha,” he exclaimed, “You smiled!” 

Levi ruffled his hair in response, “That face you were making was ridiculous. What were you thinking about?” 

Eren rocked his head side to side in a wavering manner as if debating whether or not to tell. Though they both knew he would. 

“One day, when I get big, I want to marry Leevi!” 

Levi only chuckled, “Well that’s impossible brat, did you forget? You call me your big brother. You can’t marry your big brother goof.” 

Eren frowned, playful expression leaving, “Fine. Then I won’t call you big brother anymore.” 

Levi leaned forward to leave a gentle kiss on the tip of his nose, “Doesn’t work that way squirt. Anyway, isn’t it fine like this? You can stay with me as long as you like, ok?”

“B-But… but… on T.V., when you’re in love you kiss and get married! We already kiss! So we should get married too!”

He stated his logic as if it were the most clear cut crystal. He couldn’t even be upset, at his indignant defiance, it was just too adorable, even for Levi. He always had a soft spot for the kid’s antics. 

“There’s different kinds of love, Eren. Where you can kiss but not get married, and you can still stay with that person, that’s all.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Truly??”

“Truly…”

“Abso-postively-lutely!?”

“….Eren.”

Eren nodded with a tiny blush, rubbing his nose with his index as his eyes shifted to the side and back on Levi with a tiny grin. 

“Ok, ok…” 

With a bright smile that lifted his heart, Eren rose up to jump onto Levi and wrap his arms around his neck. With a small, ‘oomff’ Levi caught the boy and hugged him back, resisting the urge to shake his head at the ridiculous conversation. 

Kids.

“I love you Leevi.” 

“I love you too, Eren.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so like.... all that smut.... and then that ending..... did I just fuck with your mind because mines fucked now! 
> 
> ...... sleep.... gonna sleep.... 
> 
> Thank you all for the comments reviews kudos and support thus far!! I love hearing from you guys and I'm happy you can enjoy this little train wreck with me! For news on updates and such - follow/track me on tumblr - I'm pretty good about putting previews and teasers as well  
> xoxstrifexox = user  
> xoxstrifexox fic: mine  
> snk fic: mine


	12. Chapter 12

He can feel his wrists burning from the friction of the leather pulling tighter around his wrist. It dug in deeper as he pressed his feet into the shoulders of the man below him; pinching the flesh beneath it. The pressure of the belt, digging into the sensitive bones as he pulled his weight back. 

Skin pricked by goose bumps and cold sweat, he thought, that any second now, the material would bite into his flesh and tear the skin around it or snap the bones it encircled. Through the pain, through the grit of his teeth, as the cries from Eren echoed from the closet, all he could think were the only words that got through with such alarming clarity… 

Protect him. Protect Eren.

They reverberated in his mind. Over in over, until the breath he starved from the man, pulling at the belt around his neck, became his own. Or rather, lack thereof. As his mouth gasped open, trying desperately to suck air into his lungs, he felt the burn of flesh shriveling within his chest. 

The corners of his vision were fading into darkness. Hazing filled his vision and blurred down, shrinking rapidly as his hands tried to peel away the hard leather now pulling back against his own throat. The wheezing choked sounds, that preceded, dulled against the ambience of Eren’s cry and his own heartbeat. Tears stung his eyes as his once fighting limbs, gave way to sporadic twitching movements. His entire body was numbing, but still he could hear the faint sound of Eren screaming above all else and his thoughts remained consumed; he failed. 

He couldn’t protect him. He couldn’t protect Eren.

With his last effort he reached for the door of his closet, abandoning his quest to remove the belt from his own neck. With pleas left silent on his tongue, his arm and hand slowly fell to the floor. As his head fell limp, falling backward to face whom it was of his Eren, of his duty to protect Eren, of his duty to love Eren, he could see the one pulling at the belt was himself. 

His eyes snapped open to the dark room surrounding them. In a panic, his heart fluttered and his chest heaved with an effort to pull in more air, but more desperately then his need for air, he searched his side for Eren. 

When brunette hair peeked out beneath the covers, resting in a bundled mess upon the pillows, only then did he feel the air he had been gasping for reach his lungs. Carefully pulling back the sheet, just enough to expose Eren from the lips down, he forced himself to calm down; evening out his breathing and pushing back the nightmare he woke from. 

Levi sat back up on the bed and pushed his sweat dampened bangs from his face. Craning his neck back as he did so, he released a heavy sigh of relief and closed his eyes. He hadn’t had nightmares like this one for years; not once at all for so long.

Regardless of why, he felt his skin crawl. His body reeked of sweat, his entire being felt drenched in it. No matter how much he pushed back, one after one, the dream triggered memories he long since tried to forget. 

With purpose, he set himself to the direction of the shower. Crossing the room to the cool tiled bathroom, without bothering to turn on any lights till he stepped into the room itself. 

Thankful that he hadn’t bothered to sleep in any clothing, he pulled back the shower curtain and ran the water; not even bothering to check the temperature as he, near frantic, twisted the handle. With a small jolt, cold water showered over his head, slowly warming. Facing the spray, he pushed back his hair, closing his eyes tightly as scenes, long buried, bubbled to the surface. 

Each hack of flesh, cut away from bone, chopped into manageable chunks as he fed it into the meat grinder, with every turn of the handle, every gush and squish and squelch, had his stomach churning. The smell alone kept him gagging, but still he worked. 

Tirelessly cutting, grinding, cutting and grinding. The organs themselves, the smell and their contents, were too much for his stomach to hold back. The muscle lurched and contracted, squeezing bile up through his esophagus. 

The blood was everywhere, soaked into his hands. Blood, stomach acids, meat, piss, shit, everything, the contents of his father stained his pale skin. He could feel his head swim. He could feel his body sway. 

Long after he was left to boil the bones, break and grind those as well, he couldn’t get rid of that smell. He couldn’t get it off his skin. 

Looking down at his shaking hands, the water spraying against him did nothing to take away what he knew, hidden beneath his skin, was there. It was there, it was always there. He couldn’t get rid of it.

His heart sped as his hand darted for the soap. He needs to scrub it off. He needs to get rid of it. He needs to be clean again. 

~   
Eren rolled over in bed, expecting to find Levi at his side. With a frown, he realized the space the man had occupied had long since gone cold. He covered his yawn with his hand, brow furrowing as he sat up and looked to the alarm clock. 

It was almost four in the morning. He recalled they ended up in bed, with a slight blush at the memory, around eight or nine at the latest. Levi did wake up early, some days before sunrise, but four was pushing it, and on top of that, for his side of the bed to be so cold he had to have been gone for a while. This suggested Levi hadn’t merely gotten up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom.

Tossing aside the covers and swinging his legs over the side of the bed, he leaned forward and tried to listen for any sounds that might clue him in on what Levi was doing. When all he caught was silence, he frowned. Pushing himself off the bed and walking towards their shut door, he could dimly see a light was on in another room, a thin line of light visible under the door. 

“Leevi?” 

Eren called out and received no answer. A bit more concerned, he opened the door and stepped into the hallway. The light itself was coming from the kitchen, but what greeted him first was the strong scent of bleach. Pinching his nose, he waved a hand in front of his face, nearly coughing as he inhaled through his mouth.

“Did he spill it,” Eren muttered to himself before speaking up again, “Leevi?”

Entering the room, Eren didn’t know what to make of the sight before him, and quite frankly, at that moment he didn’t care. 

“Levi!”

Even at the call of his name, Levi didn’t even so much as flinch. Over and over he was speaking softly to himself.

“I need to get it clean. It’s not clean. I need to get it clean…” 

Approaching him cautiously, Eren called out to him again. His concern was rising, as he watched Levi mindlessly scrubbed at the floor. He was completely nude, it was far too strange. If Levi really just wanted to clean, he would have at least thrown on shorts and a t-shirt. Bleach was none to forgiving on the skin and whenever he used bleach, he always wore a bandana over his mouth and gloves. Yet here he was, on his hands and knees, the stretch of tense muscle in his shoulder digging the brush into the floor beneath him. The skin of his hands were irritated and red, but what really worried him was the small patches of whiting skin. 

“Jesus Christ,” Eren cursed under his breath as he tried to take Levi’s hands away from the scrub brush, “Levi stop!” 

He tugged and pulled, but Levi only shrugged him off, continuing to mutter under his breath. Slowly his words grew louder as Eren pleaded for him to let go. Eventually, he went for brush, and it was then that Levi lashed out.

“It’s not clean!”   
With the boom of his voice, Levi shoved Eren away. The brunette stumbled backwards, hitting his head against the leg of the table as he fell to his back. Wincing, Eren reached for his head. It wasn’t until then, Levi’s chest heaving as the dull look in his eyes reached some clarity that the raven jolted back to awareness. 

“Eren?” 

“Yeah, it’s me. I-I’m fine.”

Forcing himself to stand, Eren moves to help Levi up. The man clinging to him as he apologized over and over, but Eren assured him he was forgiven and guided Levi to the sink. 

Asking for his hands, Eren turned on the cold water and placed them under the running faucet. With a hiss, Levi flinched. The burn of his hands becoming more apparent after he had exited the fog his mind was left in. 

“Eren, I didn’t mean to push you... I…” 

“I know,” Eren reassured him, trying to smile though his eyes couldn’t help but stare at the damage Levi had done to his hands. 

“Why are you cleaning like this?”

“I… I had to…,” he trailed off as he shut his eyes and leaned his head against Eren’s shoulder. 

With his free hand, he brought his hand to pat Levi’s head. It was off comforting him. Up until lately, Levi was always the pillar of strength in his life, in recent years he had seen his confidence waver, but he had never broken down in the ways the man showed him now. And certainly, he had never seen Levi in such a trance before. It was nothing short of frightening. What had caused this and why? 

“Leevi, please. How long have you been out here? Why are did you have to?”  
“I… I don’t know. Eleven? Twelve? I don’t… I can’t.” 

“Why can’t you? Leevi, you’ve been out here scrubbing like this… Whatever reason there is for this, you hurt yourself. Look at your hands. I worry about you just as much as you worry about me. I don’t want to see you hurt.” 

“I know… I know.” 

“Then tell me, what happened? What made you do this?” 

Levi’s eyes moved side to side, as if seeing something that wasn’t there.

“I had to protect you. Eren I did it to protect you. I had to…..” 

“Levi,” he dropped the pet name and tried to keep his voice firm, “What do you mean?” 

A heavy silence hung over them, and Eren waited with baited breath for Levi to speak. When he finally did, Eren felt the air leave his lungs.

“To protect you.. I had to stop him… My father never left. Eren, I killed him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's a pretty short chapter - I apologize -- but in the next Eren will finally get the details he never knew of Levi's past --- How will he handle it???? On top of that we might see Erwin making another appearance ! What could he possibly want????? 
> 
> So yes.. and ah sorry this took so long -- I wrote a and completed a ?two-shot? fic this past week 'What's left in our Hearts' for all those who read it Thank you so much for all the kudos and comments!! and before that I was on a 7 day cruise so I got some writing done but ... well not much haha awww... 
> 
> I have plenty on the way and a chapter to To Exist that I need to finish up
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading !~ I love hearing from you <3 Thank you again!! Till next time <3


	13. Chapter 13

Eren’s eyes searched for any sign on Levi’s face for the punch line that, he was sure, had to follow. Killed his own father? There was no way. Levi wasn’t capable of such a thing, right? Levi, who, while rough around the edges, wasn’t someone without compassion; he could never forfeit a life so easily. 

So why? Why was his voice so even? Why was his stare unwavering? Why was it firm and steady? Why wasn’t it shaking and unsteady?

Even if it was true, why couldn’t Eren find a hint of remorse in his voice or a waiver of doubt in his eyes? And what did he mean by saying it was to protect him? 

“Eren.”

The soft way he spoke should have reassured him, he knew Levi would never hurt him; he had said it was to protect him after all. In all his years, Levi had never, truly, been a threat to him. Even at his worst, even when he frightened him, he knew Levi would never do anything to voluntarily hurt him. Taking the, very few, rare events when Levi had scared him with his behavior, he knew, deep down, he was never in any real danger. 

So for the life of him, he couldn’t understand why, when Levi raised his hand to cup his cheek, that he flinched. Or why, when Levi took a step forward, his body seemed to move on its own accord and step back. 

He wasn’t prepared for the pained, crestfallen look that befall upon Levi. His heart ached as he tried to will his body to take a step forward, meet Levi’s and tell him it was ok. To tell him that, if Levi really did something like that to protect him, it had to have been for a damn good reason. One that Eren could not question, because Levi knew best, and everything he did meticulously followed his morals and values. He knew, with that in mind, that Levi wasn’t capable of something so terrible, if not for just cause. 

Thinking back to what he just walked in on, Levi scrubbing the tiles of the kitchen, bleach permeating in the air to the point, he was sure, it had to have burnt his lungs, and in light of his compulsive behavior, it all seemed to make sense in its own way. 

Even with missing details, the Levi’s patterns easily fell into place. His obsession with cleanliness could very well have been brought on by carrying out such an act. 

Murder.

The word echoed in his mind, causing every muscle in his shoulders and back to tense. He felt him body compacting, as if to fold in on itself, ready for fight or flight, even though, he knew better than to think he was in any danger to warrant it. Even if Levi was responsible for his father’s death, could he ever really call him, think of him, as a murderer? 

No. No there had to be a reason. A good reason. Levi was protecting him, he was defending him, such a thing could not be considered murder then. His mind toiled over the idea, split between the idea of what could have possibly driven Levi to do something so heinous and whether or not he had been justified; even if it was for him.

Moreover, this was something Levi kept to himself. In solitude, how many nights like tonight had gone past him noticing? How many times had Levi entered a cleaning frenzy that Eren had so casually joked about as he passed it off as a mere quirk of his personality. Had it really been for this reason that Levi became like this? And granted, even though he had never seen Levi triggered in such an extreme way, how could he have not noticed before? If it was because of what he had done to his father, if that was truly the reason for his obsessive compulsiveness, how cruel was he to have teased him all those years for something, he now realized, could have very well been Levi’s way to cope through suffering. 

Levi had to battle his own demons, day in and day out, having to live with that decision on his own. Alone, completely alone. All for Eren’s sake; everything, even this… Even something so unspeakable, Levi did this for him. Possibly at the sake of his own sanity. 

But the burning question remained, why? 

What could have possibly made Levi feel so threatened that he would have to resort to such a thing? And by his father no less. 

“I-I don’t understand. Why…How...,” Eren winced at his own trembling voice, his nerves building and getting the best of him, contradicting his desire to try calm down and let Levi explain, because surely, he could bring to light the how’s and why’s and settle his racing heart. 

Worse yet, he couldn’t control the verbal garbage that spewed forth next.

“How could you do such a thing… to your own father?”

~ 

Levi brushed off the imaginary lint on his sleeve for the umpteeth time while he waited impatiently at the corner of Hazel and Lark street. His eyes scanning those who passed by him for the one who called him out this evening with less enthusiasm and far more disdain than even the perpetual frown let on. 

His brows remained knitted, features tempting to grow tenser as each face that shuffled past him went unrecognized. He didn’t want to be out here, waiting on some no name street corner, sketchy enough as it was, waiting for a man he had absolutely no desire to see. To make this much more painful than it had to be, he had to wait here while being bombarded by the gutter trash of the general public and the rotten smell lingering beneath his feet. Nose curling, he swore he could smell the piss. Unlike home, the air here was stagnant . The atmosphere itself bogged by the odor of it’s inhabitants and their waste.

Stink aside, he was in absolutely no mood to deal with people in general. Let alone the countless numbers of loud mouthed bimbos chatting away on their phones in high pitched giggles or screeching at their boyfriends through their receivers. Nor was he prepared for the men who bumped his shoulder without apology as they rushed by to catch the crosswalk in time. Obnoxious behaviors, and voices far too loud than what was necessary, grated on his, already paper thin, nerves. 

Closing his eyes and exhaling a lengthy breath, the real source of his anxiety, that was making these minor indirect interactions currently the bane of his existence, was off god knows where thinking about knows what. 

Shoving his chilled hands into his pockets he tried not to vex himself over the ordeal. Eren would calm down, he was sure of it. Then after this, whatever this was, they could talk through this more and Eren would come to understand his reasons or so he prayed. Even just the thought of losing Eren now…

A hand on his shoulder interrupted his thoughts, though, he wasn’t distracted by them enough not to slap the hand off his shoulder reflexively. 

With a hearty chuckle, petting his own hand as if it had been injured by the small swat, Erwin stood towering over him with a grin. 

“I suppose I deserve that either way for keeping you waiting.”

“You deserve a bit more than just that for calling me out here in the first place,” Levi pointed out, trying his best not to grumble out the response. 

Levi eyed the man wearily. The fact that he wasn’t in uniform only served to fuel his suspicions about meeting him here. A red scarf and a long tan overcoat form fit against his body with a pair of darker slacks, certainly fit his visage. He might as well have been made of plastic and shoved in a box with a business Ken label. All he was missing was the gaudy leather gloves. 

Ah, his eyes found them peeking out “Ken’s” coat pockets, the look was complete. 

“I don’t see why you didn’t just pay me another unexpected visit at my house rather than drag me out here.”

“Ah, but I wish to have a more…,” Erwin looked off to the side as if searching for the correct word to place next, “appropriate place of discussion.” 

Quirking a brow, Levi remained completely unamused. Just who did he think he was fooling? Appropriate would have been his home or the police station, something private? Like this?

No, this was anything but appropriate. 

“I fail to see how meeting you outside of a professional setting is deemed appropriate.” 

He put extra emphasis on that last word. Making sure Erwin knew exactly how he felt about this apparent nonsense of a meeting; a meeting he knew nothing of the reason for even happening. Formalities seemed shattered between them at this point, at least from Levi’s view. 

Erwin had clearly called them out on their little performance as he left from his last visit. It was obvious the man had some ulterior motive for calling him out here. Why else would they be meeting like this?

But that still left to question, knowing what the man did, knowing that they were indeed lying and Erwin may very well have deduced an inappropriate relationship between Eren and himself, what did this man have to gain from using it as leverage? Because surely that was what this was. That was why he gave Levi his card and threw that pointed revelation to him as he walked away from his home; that was why he kept quiet about his case. What else could his purpose have been if not for sway?

Levi wasn’t stupid enough to see it as anything else. Erwin had the power to tear his life down over his head by continuing that investigation. The fact he made, very clearly, known to him; that he knew there was something else going on behind the scenes and ‘not’ reporting it, simply meant he had power over him. 

But to what end? 

“I imagine this conversation would have only upset your precious son. I’d also assume, you wouldn’t want to see him distraught, you’re very clearly, a very loving, doting father.” 

The raven felt himself bristle at the comment, and the involuntary reaction didn’t go unnoticed by the smiling blonde. The way those last words rolled off his tongue; cheeky, smug. Even with the scathing look cast in his direction, Erwin simply gestured his head to the side in the direction to the right of him. 

“Well, I did have dinner reservations for us. If you don’t mind, we should head over. We don’t want to be late after all.” 

“No,” Levi could barely contain the urge to hiss out the words, “we don’t.” 

The walk was uncomfortable, at least for Levi, who wanted nothing more than to kick the man’s knee caps out and punch the smile right off his face. He was even more suspicious now, more angry, more frustrated than even how their last meeting had stirred him. Yet, here he was, standing a good foot or move over his height, walking casually alongside him as if the silence were comfortable. As if they were friends or acquaintances that need not words to pass between them as they arrived to their destination. 

Not even as they were ushered into the door, of a restaurant they had absolutely no reason for being in for men in their position, and sat down at a table where their chairs were pulled out for them as if they were some god damned honeymoon couple, did that smile ever leave his face. Levi could swear, as every passing moment his eyes bore into the flesh of Erwin’s head, it only grew. 

It wasn’t until the menu’s were passed to them, and a waiter kindly offered and poured, as Erwin gratefully accepted, two glasses of a champagne, no salary detective should be able to afford, that Levi finally cut through the silence. 

“This hardly seems the place for someone of your pay grade to reserve” 

Erwin simply hummed over the sip of champagne, pulling the glass away from his lips to swirl the liquid. 

“You have me there,” Erwin leaned forward with a mischievous glint in his eye, “...though I’m a man of particular tastes, and I won’t let a simple hurdle deter me from obtaining what I want.” 

Erwin then sent Levi a knowing look, setting his chin to rest upon the back of his hand as he set the glass down on the table with his opposite. 

“But I’m sure you understand me in that aspect. At least when it comes to a certain someone.” 

“If you’ll excuse me if I both don’t follow nor care to at this point, but I think you’ve had plenty fun this evening jerking me around here.” 

“I’d hardly say I’ve provided myself with any entertainment just yet,” Erwin sat back up as he drummed his fingers on the table with a subtle tilt of his head.

“And truly,” Erwin’s eyes squinted in their mirth, “I doubt you’re the type of man to be so dense in a situation such as this. We both know you go beyond your expectations as an adult and a father. I simply would like to… have a more intimate understanding of such a relationship myself.” 

To anyone else, the conversation would seem innocent enough, but the meaning hidden behind those words shook Levi with a growing fury that began to rise to it’s cap. If he meant what Levi had thought he’d implied, jail be damned, the world be damned, he would see to it personally that every inch of flesh would be licked clean from his bones. 

Edging closer to the table, Levi’s voice dropped dangerously low.

“If you mean to touch a hair on his head I swear…” 

Putting his hands up in defense, Erwin let out a friendly laugh. Completely mismatched for the conversation, he seemed to somehow make it light enough to be believable; at least to anyone else that would foolishly play into his hands.

“Levi, honestly. My interests do not lie with Eren. I thought you would have known at least that much.” 

His jaw ground down, and he let out a uneven breath filter through his nose. Adjusting himself to sit back up as the waiter came back to take their orders, his gaze never left Erwin. The questions sitting on his tongue tasted bitter. The desire to spit them in the blonde’s smooth features far too strong to ignore, yet not the smartest impulse to act upon. The waiters own words lost as his focused remained solely on the man in front of him. 

Politely, Erwin ordered for himself, and when the waiter turned to Levi and received no answer, not even a turn of the raven’s head away from Erwin himself, the blonde took it upon himself to gain the waiters attention once more and order for him. With a small bow and a look of annoyance in Levi’s direction for his rudeness, the waiter stepped away and gave Levi the space he needed to press Erwin for an explanation. 

“What could you possibly want from me?”

Erwin laughed with a wave of his hand, “From you? No, no. Not from. You’re the one my interests lie in Levi.”

With a scowl Levi placed his hands on the table and pushed himself to stand from his chair. Whatever Erwin expected to procure from him, of him, he would not get it. He wouldn’t stand for it. The innuendo underlying his words was not something he would subject himself to; not again. He would find another way around this. He would find a way to keep Eren and himself safe, together, and he wouldn’t allow Erwin to pull at his strings like a mindless puppet to do it. 

“I think I’ve heard enough. If you want to go ahead with your false accusations, Eren and I will have them dismissed in court.” 

“Sit. Levi.” 

For the first time, the smile completely slipped from Erwin’s features.It was a warning; a silent threat that lingered in a way that sent a chill down his spine despite himself. The once gentle lift of his eyes and brows fell as his head tilted down at the chin, just enough to have him look up to him. To Levi, the new commanding presence gave him more insight to Erwin’s true character. At the very least, it was a preview to his potential as more than just a simple menace. 

“I don’t take well to orders or threats.” 

“And the court won’t take well to mysterious disappearances.” 

“What are you implying?” 

“I’m sure you can guess well what I’m implying. I won’t repeat myself a third time. Sit. I don’t think it wise to draw any more attention than you already have.” 

Glancing about the room, it was hardly a surprise to see a few lingering stares and overhear hushed whispers that rose around them. It took him only a moment longer to settle himself back in his seat. Weighing his options, it wouldn’t be wise to simply leave. Not without knowing what it was that kept Erwin so sure of himself. He was far too confident for him not to remain alert, not without truly understanding the extent of risks. 

“I’m not sure how a father who steps out on his child is that child’s responsibility, sir.” 

The venom dripped from his lips like acid from his tongue. Having the mere mention of his father leaving his mouth again this night, with the knowledge that it would probably would not be the last, only added insult to injury. 

“But you are responsible for cashing those checks, weren’t you?”

As if the man had already spoken checkmate, he watched with a look of satisfaction, “I’d much prefer if you dropped the sarcasm.”

~

“I did what I had to.” 

“I don’t doubt that…” 

“Then why are you cowering away from me.” 

Levi watched as Eren’s eyes searched every inch of his face. Wildly moving over his features before falling away to his feet or hands, getting distracted by little things here and there in the room without ever settling on his eyes; not without really looking at him. It was a dead giveaway to what Eren truly felt toward him in that moment, what he felt the very second the admittance of his part in his father’s death was let known, terror.

“I’m not.” 

“Eren,” Levi tried again. 

Steeling himself, he tried his best to keep his voice even; calm. He needed to ease Eren’s nerves. get him to relax and really listen to him. This wouldn’t work in the slightest if Eren remained this apprehensive. 

“He would have hurt you. I couldn’t… I wouldn’t allow a man like him to touch you Not you..” 

“He was your father.” 

Eren was pleading with him. Unable to see what Levi saw because he didn’t know the whole truth. He should have known he wouldn’t understand. Of course he couldn’t understand. Levi made sure Eren grew up never knowing anyone could ever be like his father. That no man would ever willingly bring harm to their son. Not through verbal abuse, physical abuse, and never, ever, sexual abuse. 

“He was hardly a father to me Eren.”

“But he was your father.” 

“THAT MAN WAS NEVER MY FATHER!” 

The boom of his voice practically caused Eren to jump backwards. He hadn’t meant to raise his voice, especially not the to volume he had. The topic of his father and the memories that remained fresh in his mind after the nights events began to erode little bit of restraint he had left. 

Even so, he knew, he had to rectify this as quickly as he had almost, if not already, spoiled it. 

“A father,” he spoke in a near whisper, “would never touch his son.” 

The shock in his eyes, and mouth hung open, was purely evident. There was hesitation in Eren’s voice, a pause as he looked up to grey orbs for the first time since they started this conversation. Swirls of emotions, confusion, pity, each one that played before his own eyes made him feel as if he was punched in the gut. He didn’t want to do this. He didn’t want to speak of it. 

“Wh...Leevi what are you saying? What.. What do you mean?” 

Levi wanted to bow his head. He didn’t want to see the pitying gaze. This was something he never wanted Eren to know about. He never wanted to tell Eren that another man, his own father, had violated him in such a way. He never wanted Eren to learn that he was soiled. Inside and out, mentally and physically. In life and at his end, even now to this day, and probably till the end of his own life. But this was something he didn’t want to share. He didn’t want Eren to know about any of this, and he never thought he’d be cornered into telling him like this. 

Especially not like this.

Somehow he needed to make Eren understand; he needed to explain. No matter how hard this would be, it would be even harder if Eren rejected him. No, not just harder. He wouldn’t be able to take it if he couldn’t make Eren see eye to eye with him. If Eren thought of him as a murderer, he didn’t know what he would do. 

~ 

He hasn’t so much as touched his fork to a single bite of food on his plate. The proposition left in front of him did little to aide his appetite. It was hard enough to swallow the idea, let alone the ‘fancy feast’ placed right under his nose. The waft of smell should have still brought some type of appeal, instead, it repulsed him. The fragrance, rather than alluring, made him feel physically ill.

This restaurant, the glass of champagne, even the meal itself, seemed like an offering; a sort of incentive to smooth over this revolting scheme of his, one that he wanted nothing of. Anything from this man would stir nothing from him but disgust. 

“What do you gain by this?”

“Power.” 

“What power could you possibly gain through me?” 

Erwin cut away a piece of his steak, making a show of biting it off his fork and pulling it in his mouth with a satisfied hum. 

“Control. I stand to gain a delectable amount of control.”

“I don’t follow,” Levi’s brows creased further, “I’m hardly in any position of direct influence.” 

Dabbing his napkin against his lips, Erwin set it back down with a small laugh. 

“Haven’t you ever wondered what it would be like to have complete control over someone? To be empowered into making decisions they must abide for you; by you? I’m sure, you’ve covet a desire to keep that ‘son’ of yours under your thumb. It’s much the same for myself, except I don’t have someone like that of my own, though you’ve seemed to provided me with a perfect opportunity.” 

Levi’s palms moved to his knees where he squeezed to try to quell his building rage. 

“So you see, It’s really not the what more as the whom I control.” 

Erwin gestured to the plate across from his with a smirk, “You’re not going to eat that? Such a shame. It’s quite exquisite.”

A momentary silence fell between the two as Erwin, who had been able to carry on through the dinner as if nothing was out of the ordinary, casually sipped his drink and continued to eat. It left Levi’s frustrations to fester, to grow more alarmed as he tried to this of anyway out of this, but came up short. If Erwin was smart enough to figure out so much on his own, just a few key words that could spiral into a full on investigation, then with a team he would surely be able to bury him. For every step he took this man’s legs reached thrice his stride. There was far too great a risk, and even if he were to try to expose this man it would be his word over Erwin’s. There was no other way was there? 

He was lost in his thoughts for so long, he hadn’t since noticed Erwin pick up the check and hand his card to the waiter. He would be forced to make a decision now, he knew. 

“Well?”

Levi didn’t react to the question right away. Choosing instead to stare at the meal he wished nothing more than to throw across the room. 

“Your answer, Levi.” 

Slowly his eyes trailed up to Erwin’s. His lips slightly parted as he struggled to reach an answer. He knew what he had to say. He knew what needed to be done, but he didn’t know whether or not he could truly speak those words. 

 

~ 

 

Eren pushed himself forward and back on the swing, rolling to his toes back to the balls of his feet before repeating the same motion. His hands holding the chain on either side of him loosely above his head, which remained hung low in thought as he stared at his shoes and the movement of his knees as they covered them. 

He wasn’t exactly sure what he was supposed to feel at this point, but a lot of things now made sense. He’d be lying if he said the thought that their first time together, when he, himself, taken Levi, wasn’t somehow soiled and in the same breath, exuberating. 

Depressing because, had he just been used to replace the feeling of what Levi’s father took for him; was it just a tool to forget? Yet, he was honored, taking fulfillment in being the only one who could liberate Levi from such a nightmare. 

The worst, he couldn’t even imagine it. He loved Levi, loved him more than anything he had ever known. It was scary to admit, and he hadn’t thought that up until now, but his life was all but Levi’s. His heart, his body, his soul, subconsciously, he had given it to Levi and voluntarily, he’d be lying if he said he wouldn’t make the same decision. Even in light of Levi’s confession.

He could feel his throat starting to close as the thoughts bubbled to the surface, scaring him out of his wits and throwing his turmoil to shame itself. 

How dare he fear Levi after all he had done? But murder? While Levi didn’t go into detail about how he rid the apartment of the body, his mind created scenarios on its own. From the cliche, rolling a body in a carpet and dumping into a river, to Daumer or Pickton feeding off the remains to animals or unsuspecting victims alike.  
Those wild thoughts aside, he realized none of this would be something Levi would do. Levi was intelligent, tactical in a way. The extent of which was truly unknown to Eren, and that became blatantly obvious. Everything he thought he knew about Levi, the gaps and cracks showed otherwise so really, could he say he truly knew him at all? 

For the first time since he told his friends off, he really wished he had them here. Sure he wouldn’t be able to confide in them, but at the very least, he could give himself a reprieve from these conflictions. 

With a growl, Eren scuffed his shoe against the ground as he rid that thought from his head once again. Levi did this to protect him. He had to right to sully that… but even so.

“Uuuuuuuuuuugggggggggghhhhh!!!!” 

He released the growing shout hoping it would help he alleviate himself from the stress of his looping thoughts but all it served to do was make him feel childish and awkward. At least no one else was in the park to hear such a thing. 

“That’s a bit of a strange greeting.” 

Eren’s head whipped around at the sound of Levi’s voice. The raven, despite the poor attempt to bring humor into his tone, kept a flat face as he crossed the small distance to stand behind Eren’s swing. With a gentle press of his hands against Eren’s back, he began to push Eren on the swing, only stepping back when necessary. 

Eren flushed, both at the realize that Levi overhead him shout and Levi pushing him on the swing. It had been like a lifetime ago that Levi last pushed him on a swing. It seemed weird, but at the same time he couldn’t help but miss this feeling. He couldn’t quite describe it, but the nostalgia from simple times long since past settled a warmth in his stomach; pleasant and welcoming. 

“How’d you know I’d be here.” 

Levi could’ve rolled his eyes, but instead he held onto the base of the swings chains and brought Eren to a stop. 

“I didn’t… It’s just quiet here at night.” 

“Yeah,” Eren agrees with a light sigh.

It isn’t till Levi crosses from behind him to crouch in front of him, that he manages to speak again. 

“I’m sorry,” he offers a soft smile though it doesn’t quite reach his eyes, “for earlier.” 

“I didn’t expect you to take it well. It’s not something… I take very well either.”

“I noticed,” Eren tried to joke and even though it was in poor taste, Levi still let out a breath of laughter and almost smiled.

Reaching up, Levi took Eren’s cheeks between his hands, caressing his thumb over his cheeks as he leaned up to place a kiss against his forehead. 

“No matter what happens. Everything I do. I do for you.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back tracking - a little fluff and the usual angsty shit too but nothing too heavy --  
> Sorry for the unintended Hiatus - I need to get back into writing - Things have been .... tough lately in many ways but I'm trying to keep my chin up -- It's just hard for me to write when I get too out of sorts - 
> 
> Sorry again - Next chapter we 'll get back on track with the story and see what erwin has planned for Levi

“Leevi!” 

Eren’s tiny legs, in a flurry of rapid movement, launched him forward as he latched onto the elder’s leg. Tugging at the cotton cloth of his sweats, Eren strained his neck back to look up to the raven with wide, hopeful eyes and an equally bright smile.

“Leevi! Can we go out to play today? Pleeeeeeeeeease!!!” 

Levi couldn’t help but roll his eyes as the boy’s lips pulled back, an absurd show of gums and teeth made it ever more so ridiculous a expression, as he held onto the syllable longer than necessary. The sight, made more comical than the pull of his cheeks, were the missing bottom tooth that left a gap between his teeth. 

The second he lost it, Levi had to deal with a panicked child running about and waving the bloody tooth in the air. All the while screaming that his tooth had died and lamenting, much louder than he deemed appropriate, not drinking milk as Levi had told him to do to keep strong bones.

He hadn’t felt the need to correct him about his teeth not actually being ‘bone’, not at least, when it finally got the brat to drink the calcium rich beverage. Either way, it would strengthen both his bones and teeth, and there was no need to go into technicalities; not with a six year old. Especially, a six year old Eren, two thousand more questions per question, no thank you. He wasn’t ‘that’ cute. 

After finally calming him down, he explained the process of losing and replacing teeth, and even went as far as spouting that rubbish about the tooth fairy. Levi never had grown up thinking there was a tooth fairy. If anything, he thought the kids in his school, when he actually attended, were idiots to buy into it. 

A floating fucking fairy. Wings. Pixie dust, the fucking works, visits you at night and pays you for your rotten ass tooth with nickels, quarters, or sometimes even dollars? Sure, he could buy that, as much as he could buy the idea of shitting out golden eggs. 

Never the less, Eren wasn’t him, and he didn’t want Eren to grow up like him, so when he told the kid about this little fairy tale, the whole crack pot story was worth it just to see the kid beam brighter than lights on christmas. 

“Is that any way to ask a favor kid?” 

The tiny smirk was a dead giveaway that he was only teasing, though Eren took it to heart and jumped back with a grin. Clapping his hands together, Eren bounced once before settling on his heels. 

“Leevi, may we please go outside to play today?” 

Levi crossed his arms, pulling his right hand to his chin to rub his index and thumb together and out, as if in deep contemplation. 

“Hmmm,” he held onto his answer for dramatic effect, one that was working all too well if Eren’s squirming and insistent chewing of his bottom lip were to tell.

“Have you cleaned your room?”

With a mini salute, Eren gave a small ‘hee-hee’ of confidence, almost certain of his victory. 

“Yes sir!” 

“And you put all your clothes in the hamper to be washed?” 

“Yup!”

“Did you put your cup back in the sink?” 

“Uh-huh!” 

“Did you brush your teeth this morning?” 

“Leevi,” Eren whined as he tried to limit, but ultimately failed, as bounced up and down on his toes, “You were there with me! You saw me do it!” 

“That so?” 

“It is so! I promise! We even used that green stuff after!”

“Mouth wash?”

“Yeah that!! And I swo- swis- show-wished it just as long as Leevi did! So can we?” 

Levi made a mental note to tease the brat on his confusion of vocabulary.

“Can we what?” 

Eren puffed out his cheeks. Spinning in a small half circle then turning his head to look back, he pointed at the door, trying his best not to whine. 

“Can we go outside to play.” 

“Can we go outside to play…..”

“Please! Can we please go outside to play, please!” 

“That’s a lot of please’s.” 

“Leevi!!!!” 

With a chuckle to himself, because Eren was just too cute not to fluster, Levi was already headed to the closet to grab his jacket and change into jeans. 

“Get dressed.” 

With a, not so silent, whoop thrown into the air, Eren chased after Levi to go get ready. 

~ 

It seemed like every kid and stay out home parent decided today was the day to take their kids to the park, unfortunately for Levi. He knew, due to his age, it meant constant nagging and questioning. Especially by the female populace. 

The first assumption was always, being as young as he was, that he was a loving older brother taking his little brother out to play. When this transitioned to an understanding that, no, this was not his younger brother, he was taking care of him. They would set upon him like vultures.

Someone his age taking the very adult responsibility of raising a child was not just commendable, it was sought after. 

It certainly didn’t help that Eren himself, being as attached to Levi as he was, gave them even more reasons to strike conversations, or at least attempt. Along the lines of, ‘He really adores you!’, ‘You must be a wonderful guardian to this little guy,’ and the ever more so blunt, ‘Do you have a girlfriend to help you take care of him?’ 

Single women took every opportunity to latch onto him or at least try to, Eren seemed to be more efficient at warding them away then even he was. Luckily, if Eren were ever in earshot he would dismiss each girl one by one. 

‘I’m not little!’ or ‘Leevi doesn’t need help taking care of me!’ 

The flare of his cheeks and his indignant pout were probably the highlights of his little temper spats. He was honestly beside himself whether to smile or reprimand him for being so rude. Especially when he mouthed off more than those two lines.

He usually ended up smiling. 

“Leevi, can you play on the jungle gym with me? I wanna do the monkey bars, the monkey bars!” 

With a raise of his brow Levi glanced over to the monkey bars in question. There were at least three or four other boys all playing on them, and though he did generally dislike other children, more so because of their parents poor excuse of discipline then the children themselves, he didn’t think it was healthy for Eren to only socialize with him, no matter how prideful he felt to the devotion Eren had for him and him alone. 

“What about those other boys there,” Levi asked, “Wouldn’t you like to play with more kids your age.” 

Eren frowned and shook his head quick enough, Levi swore, he could have flung the brain out of his ears. 

“Why not?” 

Eren didn’t answer. Instead, the boy looked down at his feet before glancing back at the boys on the monkey bars and back to his feet again. Scuffing his heel against the ground, he kicked his leg back and forth with a pout. 

“Eren,” Levi pressed, and the boy only sighed, muttering under his breath. 

“Speak clearly.” 

“I don’t want to play with them,” Eren kept up his pout and spoke barely above a whisper. 

“I asked why, Eren, you know I don’t like when you tip toe about things.” 

“I’m not,” Eren pleaded as his head shot up to defend himself, but immediately lowered again as his pout turned into a grumble, “I only want to play with Leevi.” 

“Don’t you want to make more friends?” 

“I don’t need em… Leevi’s enough.”

The raven opened his man to object, to tell Eren he could have more friends and not cling only to him, but the words fell short. Instead, he reached out to ruffle Eren’s hair with a frown. 

“Then we’ll wait for our turn on the monkey bars, ok?” 

Eren’s smile lit up almost instantly. 

“Ok!” 

Grabbing hold of the edge of the bench, Eren pulled himself up with a huff. Pouting as he tried to push his weight onto his arms, he swatted away Levi’s hand with a firm, ‘I can do it!’ as he struggled to get up and into a sitting position. With a small chuckle at his antics, Levi ignored the mini glares sent his way from musing himself in Eren’s quest with a mere quirk of his lip and brow. 

“S’not funny,” Eren pouted and he finally turned himself around to sit, plopping down with a huff and crossing his arms before definitely pointing a finger at his nose, “One day I’ll be as tall as you! No! One day I’ll be taller! Really, really, really tall! You’ll see!”

“Too tall and you won’t fit through the door kid.” 

The tike only giggled, grabbing his toes as he stretched his legs out and leaned forward, he peered over to Levi with a squint.

“I can just duck silly.” 

Levi hummed, ruffling the brunette's hair, “That you could.” 

“Leevi?” 

“Hm?”

“We’ll… always be together right?” 

Thrown by the question, Levi frowned, tilting his head in slight confusion, “Of course….,” he answered carefully, “Did I ever give you reason to think otherwise?” 

Eren quickly shook his head with his lips pressed into a tight line. 

“Then what made you think that was a possibility?”

Eren pulled his lips back, biting his bottom lip briefly in thought before shifting his eyes from Levi to the ground. 

“I always want to stay with Levi, thats why.” 

“Eren… you do-...” 

“Look! It’s our turn!” 

Without giving him even a second’s warning, Eren shot up from his seat and rushed over to the monkey bars, turning once he reached his destination to wave the raven over with a wide grin. Pushing aside the odd conversation, Levi stood from the bench and made his way over, deciding it best for now just to enjoy their time at the park together. 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Age 17 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

The moment class was dismissed, Eren didn’t so much as have a chance to pack his notebook back into his bad before a loud slap on his desk caught his attention. 

“Check it out,” Reiner smirked, mere inches from his face as he looks to and fro to make sure no one else was looking, “I found this is my dad’s office.” 

It wasn’t too much of a surprise, having Reiner try to break into conversation with him, he had attempted to do so on numerous occasions but there was just something off about the kid that Eren couldn’t quite place. He didn’t necessarily mind him, but the guy was just a bit strange.

“What are you even,” Eren began but immediately choked on his words as the large busted female leaning forward, with her legs spread out wide, in a very provocative pose, occupied the top of the magazine cover that now sat on top of his desk. 

With almost inhuman speed, he launched his body over the offensive material to cover it up. 

“What the hell are you thinking Reiner,” Eren hissed as quietly as possible. 

Never Mind the numerous screeching chairs, and chattering students whom were leaving the classroom in a ruckus. To Eren, even his voice, as low as it was, was louder than a brick thrown against a concrete floor in an empty room. 

“I’m thinking,” Reiner drew out his words for dramatic effect, “...we should snag Armin and check this out.” 

“Why would he want to,” the brunette questioned with twisted features, “Why would you think I would want to?!” 

“Oh come on Eren,” Reiner leaned closer to lower his voice, “You can’t tell me you don’t want to look. You’re a guy. You’ve got to be at least a little curious.” 

He wasn’t. Not even in the slightest. The thought of seeing a woman expose herself in photos didn’t seem appealing in anyway at all, and he was going to say as much, as he opened his mouth to throw back a nasty retort, but something stopped him. A small thought that voiced itself in the back of his head. 

An annoying reminder that most boys ‘are’ into that kind of thing. Most boys ‘are’ staring at older girls and their shapes; their curves. He knew he wasn’t most boys, and he knew how guys who didn’t follow along were treated, especially the ones who didn’t have that bizarre fascination for the opposite sex. Honestly, he didn’t see why it was so damned important, he wasn’t afraid of a fight either but that didn’t mean he wanted to paint a target on his back.

“A little,” he mumbled the lie, shifting his eyes from Reiner’s satisfied grin to his own arms which still cover the offensive material. 

What’s the worse that could come from looking at a few pictures anyway?

~~ 

Levi’s mouth pulled into a displeased frown as he heard the door slam to the front door, followed by the second of the bedroom door. The house was not meant for Eren to take out his little temper tantrums whenever he saw fit, and the shock of the noise was enough to cause him to jump and spill his coffee onto the carpet. 

The liquid glared back at him, daring to soak into the fibers of the cream colored yarn, and Levi set his jaw as he pictured just who would be scrubbing that defiant dark discoloration until it was gone. 

“Eren,” Levi called out, trying not to raise his voice too much. 

He couldn’t really be sure why Eren was having a little hissy fit. The temptation was there to shove the kids nose into the wet patch, but it was a passing aggression that ended up in a long sigh as he received no response. 

“What the hell is his problem anyway...,” the raven scratched the back of his head as he mumbled, making his way to the bedroom door.

“Eren, open up.” 

When his feet reached the spot in front of the door and not a word was heard in response, Levi’s mouth twitched to the side in annoyance, and admittedly, mild concern. A bit more firmly he requested the door be open, and again, when he was met with silence, he released a soft, agitated sigh. 

Trying the knob, he wasn’t surprised to find it unlocked. Even when Eren did have his moments, he never really ever shut Levi out. Strained as their relationship became over these past couple years, whether it was intentional or not, he always left it, ultimately, up to Levi to intervene; always leaving him the opportunity to either comfort or talk him to him. It was one of those things he found relief in. A simple gesture that showed Eren would never truly hide from him that relieved an immense burden off his shoulders. Though he could do without the obnoxious slamming of doors. It was one of those reminders that Eren was still a teen after all.

Fitting to his age, there Eren sat on his bed with his back to the door, legs pulled to his chest as he hunched over them and the light of the room ignored in favor of retreating to the dark. Levi himself had never necessarily found comfort in finding a cave to hibernate in every time he became upset, and so in a way he was grateful to see this behavior. Eren was, like most his age, going through the hormonal moods any other teen would go through. He wasn’t Levi, he didn’t have to grow up to early or have to leap over the normalities, silly as they might seem in retrospect, of an everyday teenager. 

This moping angsty little brat sulking away in the dark on his bed, maybe it should have annoyed him, and it did to a certain extent, but it was something Eren was capable of experiencing that he could not; a normal life. As much as he’d like to, with this in mind, he could never truly complain. 

Crossing the room to sit on the opposite side of the bed, Levi let out a small breath he didn’t realize he was holding and spoke in a near whisper.

“Did something happen today?”

“Obviously.”

The sarcastic bite didn’t faze him in the slightest, more than likely, this probably aggravated Eren that he wasn’t taking the bait.

“Tell me about it then.” 

Only a moment's breath between them.

“And if I don’t want to?” 

“You would’ve locked your door.”   
He couldn’t argue back. Levi knew it, just as Eren did. So instead, he rested his chin on his knees with a quiet grumble, choosing silence. Patience was the only thing he could utilize to get Eren to talk. If he sat here long enough, letting Eren’s eyes to flicker back to him to see if he’d yet left long enough, the kid would eventually cave. It was a clock work routine whenever Eren would get like this and Levi knew it all too well. 

His presence would grate on Eren’s nerves until he spilled every detail before exclaiming, ‘Happy?’ 

Predictably, with a huff, Eren glanced back to him. 

“You’re not leaving are you?”

When he received nothing in return he let out an exaggerated sigh and ruffled his hair aggressively. 

“Fine,” he bit out. 

Giving himself another moment to find his words, Eren’s mouth moved to speak several times before he managed to do so. 

“This kid at school,” Eren started then clarified, “This guy… I don’t talk to him much but he’s always trying to include all the guys into his stupid friend circle. He’s not a bad, or whatever, but today he brought in this dumb magazine and wanted me to fucking check it out.” 

“Language.” 

“Sorry.”

“What magazine?” 

“Some stupid men’s adult sh..stuff…”

Levi actually chuckled at that one, “He brought his porn to school… and showed you?” 

Eren felt the tips of his ears heat up as he nodded his head.

“Idiot.”

“Yeah,” Eren huffed out in agreement.

After a pause, Levi realized Eren wasn’t continuing with the story. Whatever happened with this boy and his stupid porn magazine must have really bothered him. Levi felt his skin itch at why Eren could have possibly gone silent. This is one of the numerous reasons he didn’t want Eren in a public school to begin with. Idiotic teens, bad influences, they all served to help Eren drift further apart from him and he already had enough with that problem as it were.

“So some moron dropped his porn in front of you…” 

“Pretty much.” 

“Is that all that bothered you,” Levi asked carefully, admittedly, a little afraid of Eren’s answer, or rather, the potential of where the answer may lead. 

If this boy had done anything else, anything to make Eren uncomfortable or put him in a bad spot…..

“He was drooling all over that damn thing it was disgusting. He was just oogling every picture staring at their tits and making these gross comments about how he’s bang this one or how he’d let that one sit on his dick. Why would he even think that's something you’d say in front of someone? In front of me!” 

“He’s a guy,” Levi fell short of shrugging, wanting to remain nonchalant but far too annoyed to pass it off, “At his age isn’t that sort of thing expected.” 

The look that crossed Eren’s face let any further words abandon his tongue entirely. A expression mixed of shock, annoyance, anger, hurt, betrayal; all at once, in a push and pull, they continued to flicker in his wide eyes.

“Fuck you.”

It was whispered. So soft he doubt he heard it. Doubt, even, that Eren had even said it; that he even dared to say it out loud at all. 

“Excuse me?” 

Levi sounded incredulously, completely scandalized, and Eren expected that but it still stung at his chest that much worse. 

How dare he? The implication alone, though it shouldn’t have angered him to such an extent, left him reeling. ‘Guy’s his age are supposed to be like that?’ But he wasn’t anything like that. There wasn’t a moment, as Reiner turned the pages with a whistle or nudge at his shoulder, that he didn’t feel uncomfortable. 

The girls on the page did nothing for him. They were pretty, he could admit that much. He’d even go as far as to say they were attractive, but he wasn’t ‘attracted to them’. 

Even though Levi might not have meant it, he implied Eren was expected to act in such a way. However, arousal wasn’t found in hallways, books, magazines, girls or even men. It was found in the form of a sinful whisper leaving his lips in the form of Levi’s name as he touched the organ hardened by the recollection of Levi’s voice. It was found in the smell of his clothes, his aftershave, his shampoo, and it was found in the mannerisms and in, the accidental or not, physical contact. 

It was Levi, it was always Levi. He didn’t want to think of any one else, just him. 

“I said… Fuck… you…” 

The surprise drained to a grimace and Levi found himself gritting his teeth, “Eren, yo-...”

“I said fuck you,” the brunette roared, his frustration gaining the best of him. 

With a strength he didn’t know he had, or perhaps he just caught Levi completely off guard, he grabbed the older male and shoved him back against the bed and let the words spill from his lips. Every bitter word, every bitter thought. Every complaint he had, every frustration. 

He loved Levi. He loved him more than he should. He wanted Levi to love him in that way. He wasn’t normal. He wasn’t like other boys. He didn’t want to be. He only wanted Levi, Leevi, his Leevi. He wanted him to want him so badly his chest heaved as he cried. The tears dropped from his eyes to cascade down Levi’s cheeks, and they only fell harder as Levi, at the end of it all, adverted his gaze with a silent apology. An apology he knew he had no hope to hear aloud. 

Pathetically, he begged, yet all Levi could do was hold the boy against his chest. Weary from the emotional struggle, Eren fell into the embrace, letting the shivers escape his body as he tried to reclaim his breath. 

After so long, after so much silence from the one who raised him, loved him, and stole his heart but would not return it, Levi stroked his back, eyes still focused on a random place in the room. It didn’t matter where, all Eren knew, all he cared about, was that the gaze wasn’t directed to him. 

“I love you Eren.” 

“...Th-then wh-” 

“That is why,” Levi let it rush out along with the long breath, “Thats why, you know I can’t.”

And he had to close his eyes as Eren’s body shook again. He knew, he was fighting a losing battle.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize a zillion times ~ that hiatus was completely unintentional - I'm going to try to get back on track with my writing - this is relatively short - I wanted to write more but I'm feeling kinda eh - I apologize again ~ I hope you can look forward to more chapters despite my absence ~ Thank you everyone <3

Levi pinched his bottom lip and chin between his pointer, middle and thumb. His ring and pinky fingers in a curled position under his chin as he stared at the screen before him. He had doubled checked over and over again for errors, and even though he found none, and knew he would not find any, he continued to scan through. Now that he was glancing over the lines of code he had written over the past few weeks, he contemplated whether or not he could go through with this. Perhaps that was the cause of his insistent checking. He was delaying the inevitable. 

To anyone else who didn’t program, it would look like nothing more than endless lines of gibberish, but if they were able to decipher it… 

Pinching his lip a little more forcefully he recalled just whom this program was for and just what he intended to do with it. Erwin Smith had proved to be a truly frightening man. Someone with such a strong sense of justice that would ignore all else in favor of the greater good. Just as he was willing to turn a blind eye to Levi’s past and even his present sins, he was a man willing to sacrifice as needed and carefully use every piece on the board as carefully as possible to his advantage. For Levi himself, to become a pawn in his game, good will or not, had it not been for Eren, he would have rather taken his chances; accepting Erwin’s challenge of locking him away. 

But of all the things running through Levi’s mind when Erwin had proposed his ‘terms’, this was one he would have never predicted. He had assumed his intentions would be far less than nobile for certain, and while Levi didn’t agree with the way this man planned to go about it, he couldn’t deny that his reasoning wasn’t just.

“Leevi..?”

Reacting faster than his mind could register just who the voice even belonged to, his hand was already on the mouse and closing out of the program. He was being ridiculous, he thought after he realized he reacted on impulse. Even considering the fact that he taught Eren how to program, without seeing more than a few lines of code he’d never be able to figure it out, especially not something so complex. He was completely on edge regardless.

He blamed it partly on the exhaustion and partly on his frayed nerves. Because he knew, no matter how much he contemplated it, no matter how much he question whether it was right or wrong, he would do it. He would do it because it was for Eren. He would do it for Eren. To keep him safe, and to keep him by his side.

In any other circumstance, it wouldn’t have even been a question. He would fight Erwin against his threats. He would challenge him on every front and dare him to pin him on any charges. But this situation wasn’t one he was willing to take risks. No matter how slim the chance, he would never gamble when it came to Eren.

Rubbing his eyes with a tired sigh, he spun the chair around. 

“Yeah?”

Levi caught the shift of weight as Eren rested on his other foot as his right hand rubbed and squeezed his left elbow when he peeled his eyes back open. The uncomfortable stance just another reminder that Eren still didn’t know what to make of the recent revelation of their past and what Levi had done. Over the past few weeks, it had been as if Eren was always watching, but more so calculating than before. As if he was trying to find hidden truths that he previously overlooked. Anytime Levi had caught his stare, Eren’s own had guiltily glanced off, and this only proved that in some way and on some level, Eren was afraid of him. 

It was the only conclusion he could draw. There was no other explanation for this tense atmosphere, and thus, involuntarily and voluntarily, Levi had kept a small distance between them. As much as it pained him, he gave Eren extra boundaries; his own little bubble, and until he felt Eren trusted him again, until Eren knew he would never harm him in any such way, it needed to stay that way. 

“I just…. When are you coming to bed?” 

Levi frowned at how soft Eren’s question was. It only solidified the fact, in his mind, that Eren was weary of him. It pained him, as it always did whenever Eren became timid around him. It wasn’t something he was used to, and it was something he never wanted to get accustomed to. 

Glancing off to the clock in the corner of his monitor, he did indeed find it edging closer to three am. Turning his head back to Eren, he cracked his neck as he stood with a small moan as some of the tension left. 

“I’ll go wash up. Go on ahead, back to the room, you looked exhausted.” 

The brunette opened his mouth to speak, but ultimately clamped his lips closed and nodded before heading back to the room. 

Levi took his time washing his face and brushing his teeth. He tried his best to avoid his own reflection but his line of sight aligned against his will. The dark rings under his eyes were all but glaring back at him in the mirror. He damn near looked like a raccoon. The sunken circles almost bruised in appearance as the blue-ish hue stood out against his, otherwise, pale skin. 

Scowling at the image, he rinsed his mouth and turned off the water, a bit more forcefully than was necessary, before exiting to the bedroom. 

The small lump under the comforter had Levi rolling his eyes, but a softer expression filtered onto his features as he drew near. The temptation to poke at the lump, locate Eren’s sides and tickle him until he burst out in unruly laughter was almost too great to pass up. Almost. 

As much as Eren had been walking on eggshells with him, and as much as he hated that, he found himself doing just the same.There was just a small bit of hope that Eren felt the same way about that. He hoped Eren was as frustrated by the distance between them as he was. Though, if he were honest, it would be of little comfort. Even if Eren did feel that way, it didn’t change the current dynamic between them. It didn’t change the fact that conversations, were once again, stiff. He even felt that touching was taboo in a way. Whether Eren acknowledged that or not, he didn’t miss the moments of hesitation when he would reach out to him or the way his eyes, involuntarily or not, watched him.

No matter how aggravating the situation was, he wasn’t willing to damage their relationship in the long run. 

Carefully, he pulled the blanket back just enough of the cover to slip under. Careful not to stir Eren and rouse him from his sleep, he laid down and brought the blankets up to his chin, rolling onto his side. The second his head touched his pillow, he knew he wasn’t by far, going to be capable of falling asleep. His mind was going to too many directions at once, there was no way he’d capable of shutting it off.

The dull ring that accompanied the silence, alongside the ticks and creaks of house, did little to help his attempt at shutting himself down. He felt hyper aware of every sound in the night. Each thought that passed felt an tangible as the mattress beneath him; prickling his skin and itching at his bones. Thoughts of Eren, Erwin, what he must do, what was working, what was failing, and with his position between the both of them bringing the heaviness that smothered him more so than anything else… 

“Leevi?” 

Ah, so he wasn’t asleep. 

“You should sleep.” 

A small break between them. The silence was hard to bear after that melodious voice broke through. Levi, without realizing, held his breath to listen to what Eren would say next, for what he was waiting for he didn’t know. Perhaps he wouldn’t say anything. Maybe, he just chose to obey and was forcing himself back to sleep rather than bothering to respond. The raven’s feet fidgeted against themselves as the quiet air settled around them. He was too high strung, maybe he should take a bath. Something, anything to help sooth this, near maddening, tension. 

“.... I don’t want to sleep…..I want….” 

Eren trailed off, contemplating what to say next, or so he thought. When he didn’t hear anything further Levi rolled over to face him. It was too dark in the room to make out his features completely, but he was sure Eren was chewing his lips between his teeth. His expression appeared torn, as if debating whether or not to speak again, and for the moment, Levi thought he was going to give up. He should have known, Eren was always full of surprises, and now would be no exception. 

“Touch me.”

A pause and Levi’s eyebrows rose.

“Excuse me?” 

Eren huffed and looked off to the side, seeming annoyed but quickly turning back to face Levi with a stronger wave of determination. 

“You haven’t touched me.. not like… not like last time. You’re avoiding me,” he accused, and truly Levi could not deny that.

“I have my reasons,” Levi started stiffly; weary of the childish tone Eren was taking with him. He knew this was not a conversation to be had without consequence.

“I told you before. Everything I do,” he began, slowly, “I do for you. Understand?” 

“No, obviously I don’t.” 

The snippy tone was enough to make the raven grimace. It was times like these he was blatantly reminded of Eren’s age; stubborn and temperamental. He was still a teenager. Still too wet behind the ears and lacking in experience to read into underlying meaning rather than taking his words at face value. 

Sitting up, Eren took it upon himself to take Levi’s hand and place it over his heart. 

“I don’t understand. I don’t get why you won’t kiss me, why you won’t touch me. You barely leave that room and you won’t tell me what you’re working on, and ever since…” 

“Ever since what, Eren?”

He was losing his patience. He was tired, exhausted beyond belief and very much at the end of his rope. There was too much stress, too much worry, too much doubt and too much fear. To throw even this in his face without any forethought into why he kept silent; questioning what he was doing and not. Eren, justified in his curiousness or not, did little to keep him from wanting to snap. At this pace he knew he couldn’t keep his head level. 

“It doesn’t matter, don’t answer that. You’re not ready, end of discussion. Get some sleep.” 

He didn’t even get the chance to completely roll over before Eren voice ripped forth another comeback. 

“So I was only ready when you fucked me the first time and now you think what? I’m a kid again? Just what are you…..!” 

With a growl, low in his throat, Levi pushed Eren back against the bed quick enough for the boy to release a startled gasp. Pinning him by his shoulder, he silenced any protest with his lips, pushing his tongue into his mouth when Eren attempted opening to try and retort. 

Levi felt Eren’s hands, palms flat against his chest, try and push him away but he wasn’t having any of it. As Eren’s palms dug deeper into his chest, he claimed Eren’s merciously. He nipped whenever the brunette denied him access, forcing his tongue inside as he traced his lips and divulged further. The hand that held his shoulder grew heavier, placing more weight into it to keep Eren from jolting up or knocking him away. 

Even with the taste of Eren of his lips and tongue. Even with the whimpers and panting that Eren couldn’t hold back, he felt no arousal. This wasn’t pleasure for him. He hated Eren’s knee jerk reaction to push him away. He hated forcing himself onto Eren. He hated that this was what he felt needed to be done in order for Eren to understand why. This wasn’t what he wanted, not in the least, it was purely to prove a point.

He knew Eren was stubborn. Words would only work so well with him, therefore, he would drive his point home through example, whether he liked it or not. 

His other hand moved over Eren’s neck, trailing over his collar bone to pass over his chest and stomach. His fingers and palm dragging the skin uncomfortably under the pressure. Even so, he wasted no time in pushing his hand downward till he cupped Eren’s flaccid member through the cotton night pants he wore. 

The second his hand touched his skin, Eren visibly tensed, and just as his hand had cupped him, Eren’s own had shot out to grab his wrist stopping short before twitching and settling back on the bed. It stung. It stung witnessing what he already knew to be true. Eren was afraid of him.

He couldn't hold back the frown that pulled at his lips as he let out a quick aggravated sigh and let the hand once holding his shoulder to snatch Eren’s wrists and pin them above his head. He couldn’t bring himself to look into the wide green eyes above him. Instead, he kept his gaze low, allowing his teeth stealing a small bite here or there as he moved down the column of the brunette’s neck. He could hear the rush of air pushing and pulling from Eren’s lungs in rapid succession. Hell, he could feel it. Damp, rapid, erratic. Levi could feel his heart clenching in his chest. Thoughts bubbling to the surface of his own past edging at his consciousness as he tried to push them further back. 

He had to do this.

Eren wouldn’t listen.

He wouldn’t listen.

He wouldn’t take this too far, just far enough to understand. Far enough for him to grasp the root of the problem between them. A growing lack of trust and the festering growth of fear.

Eren wouldn’t listen to reason so this had to be done. But, how far would be going too far?

His hand continued to wander lower, massaging his fingers over the thin cotton barrier. With a jerk, Eren gasped and attempted to squirm away with a breathless protest but Levi only pressed a bit more firmly. Alternating his hand around his thigh, entrance and length, he let his fingers press, brush and knead slowly, though there was little tenderness as he did so. 

“L-Levi..! I-I..” 

Silencing him with a harsh kiss, he nipped at his lips before pulling back just far enough for him to speak. 

“You’re not hard at all. Isn’t this what you wanted? Am I still treating you like a kid?”

He watched Eren’s lips part, shaking as he made a fruitless effort to speak. His eyes worrying over Levi’s face as they blurred with yet unshed tears. It wasn’t until their eyes caught each other that a sob escaped from Eren’s lips despite himself. With the echo of that sound resounding in their room, Eren turned his head immediately and Levi had to fight against himself not to turn his; disgusted with his own actions as he were.

Levi’s grip loosened enough for Eren to pull his wrist away and hide himself behind his arm. His chest rose and fell sharply as he took each choked breath. the raven hoped that eren understood his actions for what they were. Though even if he did, it didn’t ebb away the guilt.   
Leaning back on his heels, Levi released Eren completely. His hands curling as his sides as his face twisted in disgust over himself. 

The drop of a tear marred the brunette’s reddened cheek as another broken sob was choked out from trembling lips. Try and fight it as he may, once the first had dropped more easily followed. 

“You’re not ready…,” Levi’s voice was stern as he repeated this fact. 

A reminder. A warning. A lesson. 

Eren knew Levi better than anyone else. No. Perhaps he was the only one who could understand him at all. He only hoped he could understand this as well. It was for his own good, so they could realize both their short comings between each other and face what truly was to blame…. Although, the line seemed to blur, even for him. It didn’t sit right in his gut. It ate at him as he watched Eren struggle to calm himself down. His fists twitched, near releasing their grip in favor of peeling away Eren’s arm and comforting him. 

Instead, he withdrew from the bed. Walking to Eren’s bedside he pulled the covers over him, delivering a gentle kiss, as close to an apology as he could offer, to the top of the brown mop of hair.

“Get some sleep.” 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~   
“Ah, Levi, it’s good to see you.” 

Levi eyed the offered hand with a scowl, not caring in the least for his clipped response.

“Forget the formalities. I’d like to get this over with quickly.”

“Fair enough.” 

Smith smiled easily as Levi’s fingers strummed over the flash drive in his pocket, his nerves wearing thin. 

“Have you completed our little project?”

“Yours,” he corrected immediately, “Not ours. It’s not my project,” Levi glared before glancing off to the side, tossing around the drive in his pocket between his fingers, “I’d rather have nothing to do with this.” 

“I’m well aware,” Erwin mused as he gestured to sit.

Levi obeyed, more so to be over and done with this. The less he questioned, the quicker they could run through these motions and the faster he could get the hell out of here and back to Eren. He wanted nothing more than to bury this in his memory and leave it untouched; back home where he could lead the life he had with Eren before all this disruption. 

Taking his own seat, the taller man humbly ordered from the waitress after she approached. When asking for Levi’s own order, he waved her off, but even after another refusal, Erwin chose to order for him anyway. With a small wink and flirty comment to the waitress, Erwin completed his order smoothly, as if the raven’s bad attitude were non-existent entirely. 

Levi watched the waitress smile too brightly before happily trotting off to fill their order, his irritation growing. Why here? Of all places to hand over an item such as this one. Why a cafe in the city? Granted, it wasn’t the busiest spot, but neither was it inconspicuous. 

When he thought on it, it didn’t seem like a lapse in judgement. Erwin didn’t seem the type to make a misstep. He was always several ahead of Levi himself in every encounter they’ve had thus far. He assumed, at that point, the idea was to hide in the open. 

Regardless, this was not a meeting he could crave tea or crepes without turning his stomach. 

Soon. Soon, he’d be over and done with it.

~~~~~~~~~~

Eren played with the phone in his hand. Turning it over a few times before stroking the smooth surface with his thumb and repeating the action again. Levi had left a couple hours ago. Since that time he hadn’t moved an inch from the bed. The moment he heard the click of the door he rose out of his rouse of sleep. 

It wasn’t that he was angry at Levi, rather, he was disappointed with himself. He would be lying if he said Levi’s method wasn’t harsh, frightening even, but he knew, in a way, he was asking for it. He was just too frustrated and too conflicted as to what to feel and what to do. He just wanted everything to go back to normal, but he couldn’t shake the unease that had settled within him. Even worse, he had no one to talk to.

There was no where he could turn. No advice to be given. No comforting words or an ear to lend. There was only Levi. 

His hand stilled at that thought. He only had Levi, there was no one else. There was a time that would have been enough, and in many ways it was, but now it felt… different? 

He couldn’t explain it, and this only served to aggravate his mounting frustrations. His mood darkening as thoughts of Levi and himself, of Armin, Mikasa, even Jean, and himself, plagued him. 

Who could he trust? Even now he didn’t know whether he could even trust his own decisions. He knew he was always the first one to storm in head first. He was stubborn and brash, but Levi usually managed to keep him in check for the most part, but with the way things were now….

He couldn’t wrap his mind around any of the truths he had learned. Not about Levi’s past, which he tried in vain to move back on the subject to try and better understand, but Levi always changed the topic. He was still keeping secrets, still hiding things. Even now and over the past few weeks, Levi was creating even more. What had he been working on? Who was it for and why wouldn’t he tell him anything about it. Not only that, but suddenly things had grown quiet. He hadn’t seen that noisy officer at all since their last meeting. Was it possible he dropped it entirely? But if that were the case, then why? Why was Levi continuing to be so secretive after large pieces of the puzzle had been revealed? And why was he taking off without any explanation whatsoever?

How the hell was he supposed to overcome this and trust Levi again as he had before all this if he wouldn’t talk with him; if he wouldn’t explain?

His anger shifted back and forth, over and over again. Who was to blame for this or that. But no matter how many circles his mind ran in, he knew, all he was doing was exhausting himself. He couldn’t find answers alone, but he didn’t have anyone to turn to. 

Unless…

With a shuddering breath, he steeled himself as he opened his phone and pushed through the short list contacts. He let his thumb hover over the send button and paused.

He supposed, if he would get no where with just himself… if he was careful then maybe…

Hitting the button a little harder than necessary he brought the phone to his ear as the dial tone echoed alongside his heartbeat. 

This could be a mistake. This could make a bigger mess than what he was already in, but even so, he had to do something. 

A sound and a hesitant voice pulled him away from his thoughts as the dial ceased. 

“...H-Hello?” 

He held his breath as the familiar voice reached his ears. He’d never admit that his eyes stung as a pain pierced him, not realizing until that moment just how much he missed them.

“Eren is.. is that you?” 

He needed them now more than ever. Any regret he thought he may have had left him; simply replaced by a calming relief. With a soft rush of air passing his lips he leaned his head down with a growing smile as he dug the heel of his palm into his tired eyes.

“Yeah… Yeah, its me. I… I’m sorry… I just,” too many things were whirling in his mind all at once but he stuffed them all down in favor for the most prominent of all, “Armin I uh… I miss you guys..”

**Author's Note:**

> so like.... all that smut.... and then that ending..... did I just fuck with your mind because mines fucked now! 
> 
> ...... sleep.... gonna sleep.... 
> 
> Thank you all for the comments reviews kudos and support thus far!! I love hearing from you guys and I'm happy you can enjoy this little train wreck with me! For news on updates and such - follow/track me on tumblr - I'm pretty good about putting previews and teasers as well  
> xoxstrifexox = user  
> xoxstrifexox fic: mine  
> snk fic: mine
> 
> Till next time!


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